


Reapers and Keepers

by greendoodle



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Guardian Angels, M/M, Mystery, Reapers, Slow Build, Supernatural Elements, it's slow and concept building until it gets to chapter 4 XD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-27
Updated: 2018-10-04
Packaged: 2018-10-11 20:27:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 45,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10473738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greendoodle/pseuds/greendoodle
Summary: “What if…” Akaashi frowned, clutching his folder and the papers in his hands. “What if I decide to just kill off whoever this Bokuto Koutarou person is? What then?”Kenma’s eyes shone. “You’ll just get another living person assigned to you. Over… and over again.”“Have you done it before?”Kenma looked intently at Akaashi before gesturing with his hands to take the papers back. “Who knows?”or: Akaashi and other guardian angel/reapers look after their assigned humans.





	1. First Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> I was developing this idea ever since I saw these posts on tumblr:  
> http://star-tear.tumblr.com/post/156395372664/jordisstigander-writing-prompt-s-everyone-has  
> http://rockandrollchick.tumblr.com/post/96417796622/my-guardian-angel-probably-facepalms-himself-a  
> and thus, a cross-hybrid was born! *cue evil laughter and Frankenstein music*
> 
> It worked with the prompts for Bokuaka Week so ta-dah~! I know I'm a day behind;; but the next chapter will be up soon!  
> I missed writing my gay owls T v T As always, feedback is so appreciated!! (I shall love you forever XD)

“Alright, take care.”

Akaashi stared blankly at the file in his hands. The indicator on the side clearly read what he assumed to be a name: ‘Bokuto Koutarou.’

He looked back at the man sitting at the brown desk.

“What is this?”

The suited man looked up at him blankly. “Exactly what it looks like. He’s your assignment.”

“I don’t…”

“Oh, are you…?”

Akaashi blinked as the man stood up from the desk twirling a pen in his hands.

“You’re new here, huh? Let’s see…” he glanced down at his documents, sticking his tongue out in concentration before looking back at Akaashi with an easy smile. “Akaashi Keiji-kun.”

Akaashi nodded warily, clutching the folder in his hands as it was the only thing he could physically hold on to.

“There’s already Kei-chan so…” The man tapped the pen on his chin before making a noise of realization. “Keiji-chan!”

Akaashi stared at the man, feeling his fingers twitch in nervousness. “Excuse me?”

“Your name, duh,” the man hummed, seating himself back in the office chair. “Anyways, since you’re a newbie, I should probably call someone to help you out…”

In an instant, a shadow appeared from behind Akaashi and he jumped, looking back to see a shorter man with bleached hair standing astutely in the illuminated doorway.

“Kozume-chan?”

The shorter man responded with a curt nod.

“Could you please help Keiji-chan get adjusted? He’s new here.”

“No, wait,” Akaashi shook his head, hands still clutching the file. “I still don’t know what I’m doing here or why… who ARE you people?”

“That will all come in time,” the man smiled, straightening some papers on his desk. “Now, if you please?”

This ‘Kozume-chan’ gave Akaashi a quick look out of the corner of his eye, before nodding once and turning to disappear out the door.

“Wai—” Akaashi started, beginning to run after him.

“Ah, and Keiji-chan?”

He stopped, looking back at the man at the desk whose hazel eyes now seemed illuminated from where Akaashi stood.

“It’s Oikawa-san to you.” the suited man gave him a sad smile before swiveling around in the chair. “Don’t let go of that folder.”

 

* * *

 

 

Akaashi blinked a bit helplessly as light washed over him from the doorway.

He didn’t know where he was going or where he was headed, but his feet carried him towards the direction he presumed ‘Kozume-chan’ was at a steady pace. The shining light behind the door lead to an open space where the two were walking in sync.

He couldn’t see anything but blinding brightness, and he felt extremely lost despite the fact he didn’t really remember anything about anything except for his own name. Honestly, what was he doing in a random office room out of the blue clutching a folder as if his life depended on it?

He stared down at the folder in his hands, half tempted to let go of it and run aimlessly into who knows what direction elsewhere. Surely, listening to the words of strangers was not a good way to start for having some kind of amnesia, right?

“Don’t let go of that folder.”

Akaashi jumped. He didn’t think ‘Kozume-chan’ could talk at all much less give him orders in that kind of tone.

“Ah… mm,” Akaashi agreed quietly, feeling his fingers shake on the files, suddenly scared of letting go. He couldn’t see the boy ahead of him, but he could feel his presence somehow. “Um… Kozume-chan…?”

“Call me Kenma. Oikawa always gives us guardians really crappy nicknames.”

“Guardians?”

“Yeah,” Kenma responded curtly and it seemed as if he came to a stop, prompting Akaashi to stop walking as well. “We’re here.”

The brightness around them slowly melted away and Akaashi blinked, finding the two of them in a park on a bright, sunny day. He gaped at his surroundings, a bit surprised that their walk through the eternal abyss of nothingness brought them to someplace far away from the office room where they started.

“Where—?” Akaashi began but stopped upon seeing Kenma.

The short boy with bleached blonde hair was no longer standing next to him and instead, in his place stood a small, black-haired child. The only feature he could tell belonged to the Kenma he had known for those brief moments were his large, amber eyes. Akaashi began to point a finger at the child in shock before realizing that he was reverted to a younger version of himself as well, messy curls and all.

Kenma smiled a little upon seeing Akaashi’s expression. “I was kind of stunned too, the first time.”

“How…?”

Ignoring the question, Kenma pulled some paper out of his… white kimono? White kimono? When did they get changed into kimonos? They were previously in the same style of suit as Oikawa.

Clearing his throat and then ultimately deciding against talking, Kenma thrust the papers towards Akaashi.

Taking them in his hands, Akaashi read the words on the paper carefully.

“ _Being a Guardian Angel/Reaper_ ; _contrary to popular belief while you were alive…_ ”

Akaashi blinked. “I’m dead?”

Kenma shrugged. “Some of us remember. Some of us don’t. All depends on how we died.”

Nodding slowly, Akaashi continued:

“ _...your sole purpose is not to just protect, but also to document. Given to you are files on the person you will accompany. You are to document on the human that you are given. All documentation in this file will automatically be sent to the briefing room for organization. Not only do you have the power to take the life of your person at any moment, but you should keep from being spotted. You are technically invisible to them, but not completely, so be wise. Touching your human or interfering in their lives other than in instances of great peril is prohibited.”_

Akaashi began to think this was too much work already. He skimmed down to the end.

“ _Humans are frail creatures. As a human in the past, it is the guardian angel/reaper’s duty to keep their person safe from fatal dangers until it is time. If there is no proper documentation, the guardian angel/reaper’s duty continues until the right documentation is eventually provided even at the expense of multiple human lives. Good luck._ ”

Akaashi looked up helplessly at Kenma. “What am I supposed to document?”

“Nobody knows for sure to be honest,” Kenma shrugged. “All we know is that those who document ‘properly’ disappear and we never see them again. At least… that’s what Oikawa says.”

“Who is he?”

“Oikawa?” Kenma inquired, looking up at the bright blue sky. “The same as us probably? But, he knows what he’s doing most of the time so he’s basically our leader I guess.”

“…our?”

“There’s others of us too.”

Akaashi furrowed his brows in confusion. There were still many things he didn’t understand. He didn’t get why they had been assigned to complete this task and why ‘properly’ documenting made them disappear. Would that be better than staying here doing the same thing forever? Babysitting people for an indeterminate amount of time hardly seemed like an enjoyable pastime. Did he have to fulfill a higher purpose that he didn’t understand for entities he had no knowledge of?

“What if…” Akaashi frowned, clutching his folder and the papers in his hands. “What if I decide to just kill off whoever this Bokuto Koutarou person is? What then?”

Kenma’s eyes shone. “You’ll just get another living person assigned to you. Over… and over again.”

“Have you done it before?”

Kenma looked intently at Akaashi before gesturing with his hands to take the papers back. “Who knows?”

Akaashi didn’t know it was possible to get chills once a person passed away, but at least he had his answer now. Tightly gripping the file in his hands, he looked at the indication with the name once more, swallowing thickly.

“Well, I kind of feel like it’d be boring documenting for the rest of eternity so I guess I’ll do my best,” Akaashi said softly.

Kenma smiled and then pointed towards the jungle gym portion of the park. “That’s him.”

Akaashi looked towards where Kenma was indicating and found himself looking at a boy who seemed to be about his age with white and black hair spiked up like some kind of overgrown fern in a garden. The boy was bouncing around from one section of the jungle gym to the next with another boy who had straight, black hair jutting out at odd angles like a messy comb.

“I’m… looking after a toddler??” Akaashi asked, incredulously.

Kenma shrugged. “Some of us get assigned young people, some of us get assigned old people.”

“Is that why we look like toddlers now too?”

“You’re getting it.” Kenma said, taking a few steps back from Akaashi. “Except, I’m headed back. So, bye.”

Akaashi’s eyes widened, turning to his senior. “Wait, I still need…”

He looked around finding himself alone on the outskirts of the park. Akaashi sighed deeply, looking down forlornly at the files in his hand. He figured it wouldn’t hurt to take a look inside for starters.

Eyeing an empty bench, Akaashi made his way over to open the file about Bokuto Koutarou. Judging by where Kenma had pointed, it had to be one of the two kids playing around on the jungle gym. He had a hunch which one it was--the one his eyes had automatically drawn to--but he needed to make sure.

Suddenly being reverted to the age of 5 or 6 out of the blue made getting up onto the bench difficult. After hopping onto it with moderate strain and effort, he huffed, flipping open the folder wide.

The contents were sparse. There was a small photo of the boy as a baby and then one at 1-year-old, 2-year-old, 3… the papers didn’t say anything specific other than the birthdate, his current favorite colors, his height, and his weight at every point in his life until now. Just as Akaashi had expected, the boy he would be taking care of was the animal planet disaster of zebra hair on the swings now. He squinted, looking at the two as they laughed like a bunch of midget maniacs. Well, it wasn’t as if the other boy’s hair was any better.

Closing the file, Akaashi continued staring as the two boys made some contest about who could swing highest. He sighed, throwing his head back up to view the sky. There were only a few clouds out and it was a clear, sunny day. The perfect day to nap and do nothing.

What was he even supposed to be looking out for? Some kind of natural disaster? Kidnappers? Thugs? What in the world was he supposed to do as someone as short and tiny as this Bokuto boy? He definitely couldn’t fend off a potential attacker as an equally small child.

He found himself sighing again. Honestly, what was the point? Being a babysitter for the rest of time was boring, but there weren’t any repercussions for not keeping these people alive either. Would it be too bad to let a few die here and there?

Akaashi heard a squeal and a gasp before a sickening crunch. He jolted up, looking for the two boys and found rooster-head rushing towards Bokuto as Bokuto curled into himself, whimpering quietly.

Wide-eyed and intrigued, Akaashi made sure he was holding onto the folder before leaping off the bench and making his way towards the two. Upon reaching them, he saw that Bokuto’s arm was either broken or sprained, and he presumed that the dolt had jumped off the swing in his enthusiasm.

“Sh-should I call your mom??” the bedhead asked, in obvious panic.

Bokuto didn’t answer, his face twisted in pain. Instead, he merely whimpered, curling into himself more.

Being closer to the two, Akaashi was able to recognize some key features of them he hadn’t noticed before. The uninjured one had slanted eyes and was thinner while Bokuto looked to be rounder and rougher overall. The two were covered in dirt from head to toe and had t-shirts and shorts on along with rugged sneakers.

Akaashi stepped closer to look at the wound. Slant-eyes didn’t seem to notice him at all, merely looking past the curly-haired boy standing in front of him. Akaashi reached out to touch Bokuto’s arm, but recoiled remembering the conditions of being… well, whatever he was. He wasn’t supposed to touch except in times of great peril.

Akaashi looked down at the boy and narrowed his eyes. Didn’t this sort of count as a time of great peril? I mean, obviously, Bokuto was in pain and there was the possibility that he could die from breaking his arm. Akaashi blinked. Actually, he didn’t know whether people could die from breaking bones. So, should he just let this one sit?

Akaashi mused over it for one moment longer before deciding against intervening and backed off from the two boys. Right as he did so however, Bokuto looked up and they locked eyes: teary goldens to modest greens. Akaashi froze.

“I’ll go get your mom!” Akaashi heard in the background, but failed to register as Bokuto sniffled, brought his knees together and continued to stare directly at him.

One thought flashed persistently through Akaashi’s mind. ‘Can he see me?’

Time seemed to stand still for a moment too long until Akaashi heard a woman screaming Bokuto’s name, and after ripping his gaze away from Bokuto’s, he stood aside to let the mother rush in to grab her child.

“Kou?! Kou, my baby, what happened??”

Bokuto whimpered and sobbed, fresh tears rolling down his cheeks, burying his chubby face into his mom’s shoulder. The mother rubbed the boy’s back and bounced him around a bit before asking the friend for details.

The three of them made their way to a car nearby where they were greeted by another middle-aged woman who Akaashi presumed to be the friend’s mother. They exchanged a few hurried words before Bokuto was carried into the vehicle. Akaashi watched the car drive away into the sinking sunset, most likely to a hospital somewhere.

Akaashi sighed, releasing shoulders he didn’t realize were tense. Well, that could have gone better. Now what was he supposed to do?

Just as if on cue, the same medium-length black haired boy seemed to appear out of thin air next to him.

“How was it?”

Akaashi groaned. “I’m so lost. What am I supposed to do? I don’t think he’s going to DIE but, he did get hurt.”

Kenma nodded. “Yeah, I saw. Oikawa said to keep an eye on you because you’re new.”

“Am I fired?” Akaashi murmured with a little grin, feeling as if he were way too dead for this kind of trouble.

“No,” Kenma gave a soft smile. “He just wanted to make sure you weren’t completely lost.”

“But, I was.”

“Well, you did rush to help, didn’t you?”

“Mm…” Akaashi responded tiredly. “Wasn’t much help.”

“I think that was a good call leaving that arm alone,” Kenma said, inviting Akaashi to start walking with him again. “You have good instincts.”

“You think?”

“I totally ignored my first human.” Kenma mumbled. “He was this big, lumbering tall… half-Russian, half-Japanese… green-eyed… nuisance.”

Akaashi snorted. “Nuisance?”

“Yeah, I got him sometime in his middle school years,” Kenma continued as their surroundings became a blinding white once more. “He was so awkward and obnoxious being the only one above six feet in his classroom, I didn’t even want to bother.”

Akaashi noticed the two of them were reverting back to how they were before, their childlike features disappearing one by one. His robes dissolved into the same suit he had been wearing previously.

“So, it was totally my bad I didn’t see that car coming and well, with a target as big as him—”

Akaashi stared at Kenma with wide eyes. “Did he end u—”

“Welcome back, you two.”

Akaashi stopped walking, setting foot in the same office once more. He had a feeling he would need to get used to being here. Oikawa was sitting at the desk just as he had been when Akaashi had left, twirling a pen in his fingers.

“How was it Keiji-chan?”

“It was…”

“Ah, ah!” Oikawa interrupted, wagging a finger in front of them. “Don’t tell me…” The man pat some spare folders on his desk and raised an eyebrow at Akaashi. “Document it.”

“…right.”

After Kenma promised he would return to introduce Akaashi to the others, Akaashi sat down in a spare couch in the room and the moment he opened the folder, a pen magically appeared in his hands. The sole intention to document something had willed it into being. Akaashi stared at it in quiet amazement before wondering what he would write.

By all accounts, there wasn’t much he COULD write. He had barely spent an entire afternoon with the kid much less gotten to know him as he played some kind of rough housing game with the other child. Akaashi stared blankly at the paper before him and frowned. He had to write SOMETHING.

If only the kid hadn’t been a complete wreck, then Akaashi would have gotten some actual good information…

A lightbulb went off his in head.

It wasn’t much, but before he could stop himself, he wrote a statement on the blank paper that was now producing lines for him to write on top of.

Bokuto’s weakness #1: Gets overexcited to the point of injury.

He stared at it a moment longer before shutting the folder closed. Well, it was a start.

Oikawa was waiting for him, writing something down on the desk with a free hand outstretched. Akaashi placed the folder in his hands and watched the man swivel around in his chair and place it in the shelved section with the rest of the B’s.

On cue, Kenma was behind him and ready to take him to meet the rest of… people like them.

They entered the brightly lit doorway once more and began walking to who knows where. Akaashi was pleased to see that his body wasn’t undergoing age changes again. He wondered if Kenma’s current human was also the age of Bokuto.

“Kenma?”

“Hm?”

“What’s your current human like?”

Kenma paused and then looked straight ahead. “I don’t have anyone assigned right now.”

“Oh,” Akaashi murmured, feeling the grooves of the fingers in his left hand with his right. “Did you like your humans?”

Kenma gave him a strange look. “What do you mean?”

“Like… I don’t know, when I was thinking about what to do with Bokuto, he was… well, he was just a mess so I didn’t know what to think of him to be honest. I was completely satisfied with letting him die. But then, I think… I think he stared at me for a bit? And it felt weird like it wasn’t me who was doing the watching. And I felt like I could come to like this kid if I spent more time with him.”

“Mm…” Kenma responded, focusing on the path ahead of them. “Not really. Besides, he was probably spacing out. Our humans usually can’t see us.”

“Why not?”

Kenma looked Akaashi in the eye. “Cause they don’t like seeing death.”

“Aren’t we keeping them from dying?”

“Yeah, but, we’re also the ones who kill them in the end.”

Akaashi felt his pace slow as he let those words sink in. He was new to all of this, and yet, it felt so natural, the easy flow of life and death in the hands on a single entity.

He remembered the large, golden eyes of the boy on the playground. Eventually, he’d have to end the life of something that small… something that was once so bright-eyed and chipper. Akaashi didn’t really know how to feel about that.


	2. New Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“Bo, what are you talking about?”_
> 
> _“There’s like… a kid!”_
> 
> _“What kid?”_
> 
> _Akaashi heard some steps and turned to come face to face with rooster-head who was looking down the hallway on both sides. He seemed to completely look past Akaashi._
> 
> _“There’s… no one here, Bo.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic will prob carry on a little after Bokuaka week I've come to realize XD So erm, I guess, look forward to that??  
> Hope everyone is enjoying it so far~ it's weird writing so soon after the first chapter tbh I should write more frequently XDD

The light faded away to reveal an area that looked like a guest lounge. There were a few couches and chairs surrounding a rectangular table. The entire area was carpeted and a lone, unlit fireplace stood nearby as well.

Akaashi blinked, noticing one figure lounging around the fireplace and another sprawled out across one of the couches presumably sleeping. He stuck a little closer to Kenma’s side as they made their way from the glowing entrance towards the middle of the room.

Wordlessly, Kenma sat down on the other remaining couch and Akaashi followed, eyeing the figure across from them who had his eyes squeezed shut. He looked to be a delinquent from his shaved head and the black suit jacket they all wore draped across him like a blanket. He had broad shoulders and seemed to be grumbling in his rest.

“When we sleep, we have the same dreams that our human has,” Kenma explained, lying down more comfortably. “Helps us get to know them better or something, I have no clue.”

Akaashi shifted slightly in his seat, eyeing the screwed face of the delinquent man. “Looks uncomfortable.”

“We get our fair share of nightmares, though it doesn’t affect us as much as it does our human.” Glancing at the figure across from them, Kenma made a face. “Honestly, the wet dreams are the worst.”

“Newbie?” a voice from behind droned.

Akaashi jolted, and turned around to see the figure around the fireplace directly behind him, looking down at him with a condescending smirk.

“What’d you do to land here?”

“Huh?” Akaashi voiced, confusion clear in his tone. He looked the stranger over from the top of his blonde curly locks to his long, lanky form. The man seemed to be younger than him, but his golden eyes spelled trouble. The suit he was wearing made him look sharp and professional, despite the fact he was slouching over to look at the two on the couch.

Feeling slightly apprehensive, Akaashi arranged his body so that he was facing towards the blonde. He glanced over at Kenma once before looking back up at the man’s sneering face. “What does that mean?”

The blonde began to talk back, but was interrupted by Kenma.

“Akaashi-san currently does not have memories of his death.”

“Ah, is that so?”

“Excuse me,” Akaashi frowned at the two of them. “Who is this? What is he talking about?”

Kenma gestured towards the man’s lanky form. “This is Tsukishima Kei. The one Oikawa calls Kei-chan.”

“Please don’t call me that, Kenma-san,” ‘Kei-chan’ said, looking disdainfully at the bleached head of his fellow guardian.

Kenma shrugged, laid back on the couch as a video game console popped into his hands out of thin air.

Akaashi stared at the device in Kenma’s hands for a moment longer before looking back up at Tsukishima. “What did you mean by that question before?”

“What question before?”

Akaashi deadpanned. “The one about what I did to get here?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Tsukishima hummed before making his way over to one of the chairs and sitting down comfortably as a pair of headphones appeared over his ears.

Inwardly, Akaashi groaned. He didn’t know he’d be working with a bunch of cheeky little shits at his new ‘job.’ Was he going to get answers out of anyone at all? He lay back on the couch, huffing as the figure on the couch across from them stirred and slowly sat up.

The delinquent blinked a few times, smacking his lips together before slowly turning to look at a very tense Akaashi.

“AHHH?”

Akaashi jumped at the exclamatory remark. He wasn’t sure if it even was an exclamatory remark or an invitation to fight. He glanced at Kenma for help, but the man seemed to be immersed in whatever game he was playing.

“Newbie?”

Before Akaashi could confirm, the delinquent had rushed forward, giving Akaashi one of the most stupidly intimidating looks he had ever seen. “What’re you in here for? Huh?!”

“I’m,” Akaashi stammered for a moment before giving the man a small smile and sticking out a hand in polite greeting. “I’m Akaashi Keiji. I apparently have some sort of amnesia so I don’t know how to answer your question.”

“Is that so?! Well, I’m sure whatever you did, it definitely called for—”

“BAAALLDDYY~!”

Suddenly, the delinquent was being pulled back away from Akaashi’s face. Akaashi sighed in relief, feeling a deep sense of appreciation for whoever it was who had prevented his eventual assault. He wasn’t sure if he could even feel pain given he was already dead, but he definitely needed the personal space.

Akaashi wasn’t sure when Oikawa had entered the room, but there he stood, grabbing the collar of the man’s dress shirt and looking at him disapprovingly. “Why do you always have to intimidate our newbies?”

The delinquent murmured something about an initiation ritual which made Oikawa sigh and put one hand on his waist, shaking the man slightly. “Honestly, don’t be such a brute, Iwa-ch—ah.”

Oikawa let go of the man, throwing a hand over his mouth. Then, as if he hadn’t reacted at all, he closed his eyes, breathed out once, and gave the delinquent a look that was enough to freeze over a continent. “Baldy?”

Ryuu-chan grumbled once, then turned towards Akaashi and bowed awkwardly. “Name’s Tanaka Ryuunosuke.”

Akaashi gave a lopsided smile in return. “Pleasure.”

Oikawa glanced at all of them with a winning grin and clapped his hands together. “Great to see everyone getting along! Is Futa-chan back yet?”

Earning no response, he looked around the room, humming to himself before nodding. “Guess he’s still out doing his thing. Or maybe he’s disappeared already!”

There was a deathly silence that filled the room. Akaashi wasn’t sure if it was due to Kenma and Tsukishima’s lack of attentiveness or if disappearing was as devastating as everyone made it out to be. Oikawa turned to look directly at Akaashi.

“We don’t have private rooms so feel free to sleep anywhere you’d like here,” he smiled, his eyes dancing with amusement that seemed oddly misplaced. “Some guardians decide they don’t want to sleep because of the dreams, and that’s fine too since we actually don’t need to sleep to function.”

He gestured to Kenma and Tsukishima who were still immersed in their own separate activities. “You could always summon something as well.”

Akaashi glanced over at the video game console and the headphones before looking back at Oikawa. “Anything?”

“Ah, well, no,” Oikawa smiled. “We can only summon the item we were most attached to when we were still alive. Why don’t you try?”

“How?”

“Just like how you summon your pen to document,” Oikawa responded before furrowing his brows in deep thought. “Though, I suppose that’d be difficult given you don’t remember anything.”

Akaashi stared down at his hands cluelessly. “I… uh…”

“Like this!” Tanaka smirked, snapping his fingers as a few comic books fell into his lap. Akaashi thought the man looked as if he wanted to be praised.

“I see,” Akaashi said instead, looking back at his fingers. They were long, and a bit ugly, he thought.

“Don’t rush it, Keiji-chan. Just get some rest for now.” Oikawa pet him on his shoulder before turning to Tanaka who seemed to be pouting a little. “You headed out, baldy?”

“Yeah,” Tanaka responded, stretching a little and standing up straight. “My human is so boring though. He had a dream about filmin—”

“Ah, ah!” Oikawa tutted, protruding a folder from his suit jacket and handing it to the man. “Document it.”

Tanaka grumbled something about stingy rules before grabbing the files and heading out the illuminated doorway.

Oikawa watched the man leave before bidding the rest of them farewell and disappearing as well out the same entrance. Akaashi figured he wouldn’t be able to get any answers out of either Kenma or Tsukishima so he got himself more comfortable on his portion of the couch and let his eyelids fall.

He didn’t know what to expect from the dreams of a toddler, but it wasn’t long before he felt himself drift into deep sleep.

Akaashi blinked as the haze cleared and he saw Bokuto’s unruly hair and all running along a stone path. Akaashi wasn’t able to move or do anything, merely watching the dream play out as if it were a movie.

It was a bright, sunny day and the greenery around the boy was as alive as he was, lush and thriving, flowering all across the path. A silhouette appeared, running next to the child and Bokuto beamed upon seeing the shadowy figure. The figure seemed to be a boy around his age with unruly hair. Akaashi assumed it was the same friend Bokuto was playing with in the park during the day.

Bokuto held out a hand and the silhouette grabbed it eagerly and the two continued along the path, chasing birds and kicking rocks together.

Suddenly, the stone path started to dissolve behind them and in alarm, Bokuto shouted something that seemed to get caught in his throat. The silhouette didn’t seem to hear and stopped in his tracks despite Bokuto’s attempts to pull the boy away from the crumbling floor that was approaching them.

The silhouette stood his ground and the earth fell beneath him. Bokuto lunged forward with the momentum, still holding on, his arm getting dragged lower, deeper, under…

There was a sharp ache Akaashi felt in his arm and he recoiled a bit from the dream, blinking rapidly in his attempts to repel the burning sensation. Was he feeling the pain Bokuto was through the dream?

The world was dissolving into black and the pain only worsened as everything disappeared. Bokuto seemed to be falling, and yet he was in the same place, clutching the same arm he had injured that day. His vision was blurring and his thoughts were jumbled. Before the scene faded to black, Akaashi felt two eyes watching him.

He jolted awake, clutching the cushions of the couch with fresh tears in his eyes.

 

* * *

 

 

“Will you be fine without Kenma?”

Akaashi took the folder from Oikawa’s outstretched hand and nodded solemnly. “I think I can manage.”

“Mm,” Oikawa hummed, getting up from his office chair and heading towards the illuminated doorway. “I know you met the others the other day, but I should probably explain how the door works.”

Clearing his throat, the man leaned against the doorframe, pointing at the file in Akaashi’s hands. “Unless you have a folder, the door is the only way to go back and forth between the lounge and the office. Once you have a folder, the door immediately takes you to where you need to be for your assignment. Simple, right?”

“Given the lack of answers I’ve been getting here, surprisingly so,” Akaashi mumbled, earning a snicker from Oikawa.

“Kozume-chan didn’t tell me you were a smartass too,” Oikawa grinned, heading back to sit in his seat behind the desk. “Don’t worry, things will get easier with time.”

“We have a lot of time, huh,” Akaashi smirked.

“That’s the spirit,” Oikawa responded, twirling the pen in his hands. “Once you’re done with your task, just give your folder a little shake and you’ll be able to walk back to this office.”

Akaashi nodded, making sure he was holding on tightly to his files before bidding Oikawa farewell and heading out the illuminated doorway to who knows where.

The walk was surprisingly short.

Having a much more solid grasp on what he was there to do, Akaashi felt less intimidated by the blinding brightness around him, not even taking the time to acknowledge his change in clothes or size. He walked confidently ahead and stopped only once the light began to dissolve around him.

A pearly white hallway.

Akaashi blinked, wondering if he had made a wrong turn somewhere until he saw a few doorways littered down the length of the hall. He made his way towards the rooms, taking care to read the inscriptions that were on each of the doors.

_‘Patient 4: Takanobu Aone – Broken leg.’_

Ah. He was in a hospital.

He quickened his pace, looking for the name indicated on his file.

Something drew him towards the room with the door open at the end of the hall. Upon reaching it and confirming Bokuto’s name on the plate, he paused outside, hearing voices.

“Now we can’t play anymore,” a pouty voice rang out.

“That’s okay! My mom got you these really cool picture books! Look, there’s a bunch of owls on it.”

There was a moment of silence save for the sound of pages flipping and occasional laughter. Akaashi made his way into the room.

It was a typical hospital room with white sheets and white walls. Bokuto was laying in one of the beds, his arm in a cast that had ropes hanging from the ceiling attached. The natural bedhead was there too standing on a chair, pointing excitedly at some pictures on the book on Bokuto’s lap.

Akaashi stood adjacent to the entrance, leaning against the wall and twiddling with his fingers. This was even more boring than the two kids playing at the park the other day. He was beginning to space out again. He let his eyelids fall.

Bokuto giggled a bit at something the other boy said, but then stopped suddenly, an unnatural silence filling the room. Akaashi opened an eye.

“When did he get there?”

Akaashi jumped, looking towards the two to find Bokuto pointing at him with an uninjured finger. The black-haired comb disaster seemed to be confused.

“What are you looking at?”

“Him!” Bokuto asserted, jabbing his finger in Akaashi’s direction as if that would help to improve his friend’s vision. “He was at the park the other day too!”

Akaashi felt as if he had to go. With tensed shoulders, eyes still locked with Bokuto’s, he began to walk stiffly towards the entrance once more.

“Wait, no, don’t go!”

“Bo, what are you talking about?”

Akaashi stood rigid outside the door, feeling something beating heavily in his chest. Did guardians have hearts? It wasn’t as if Bokuto could follow him so why was he feeling like this?

“There’s like… a kid!”

“What kid?”

Akaashi heard some steps and turned to come face to face with rooster-head who was looking down the hallway on both sides. He seemed to completely look past Akaashi.

“There’s… no one here, Bo.”

“No, it’s the same guy with curly hair!”

Rooster-head gasped and went back into the room. Akaashi could hear hurried footsteps running away from him and jolted when he heard the chair clatter loudly as if the boy had tackled it in his haste.

“I heard something like this before! People see things when they’re going to die. I think it was called a… reaper? You see it and nobody else can. And then… you die! Bo, does it hurt that bad?”

“Ow!” Bokuto yelped and Akaashi imagined the bedhead had moved forward to clutch the injured arm. “Don’t be dumb Kuroo, he’s there! Maybe he’s just shy or something.”

“But, I really didn’t see anyone…”

There was an awkward silence. Akaashi wondered if he should head back. There was no way Bokuto would fatally injure himself if he was tied down to a hospital bed. He heard a small whisper.

“Is he imaginary?”

“…maybe?”

“What does he look like?”

“Like, he has curly hair and he’s wearing all white and, and… oh! He has really green eyes!”

“…that sounds fake. Only one in a bajillion people have green eyes.”

“But he does!”

The voice sounded really pouty. Akaashi exhaled slowly, trying to calm himself. It wasn’t as if it was illegal to be spotted by his human. He just didn’t expect it, no, not at all. Perking his ears one last time, he noted that the Kuroo kid seemed to be trying to cheer Bokuto up, the injured boy extremely disheartened by the whole ordeal.

Akaashi sighed before shaking the contents of the folder, wanting to escape as soon as he could. Next time, he’d be sure to keep a considerable distance between him and Bokuto. That much was for certain.

Immediately his surroundings began to dissolve and he was surrounded once more by a bright white light on all sides. He began to walk, his mind a blur until he reached the doorway leading into the office.

Oikawa didn’t seem to question his quick return much to Akaashi’s relief. Akaashi settled down at the same seat as the day before intending to document, but nothing came to his mind. The only thing he could register were the boy’s bright golden eyes locked on his. He wondered if he could ask Oikawa whether guardians had hearts, but decided against it because it seemed like such a fickle, unimportant question in the great span of things. Surely there have been humans strange enough to be able to see the guardians? It wasn’t something to get worked up about.

And yet, Akaashi couldn’t stop shaking. His fingers curled and uncurled around the pen for what seemed to be an eternity and because he couldn’t think of anything else, he wrote:

Bokuto’s weakness #2: Can’t learn to take a hint. Gets dejected too easily.

Akaashi nodded in agreement to his writing. Honestly, if other humans couldn’t see him, then he should just let it go, shouldn’t he? There was no point in arguing his point with a friend who had no idea what he was talking about.

He sighed, closing the file and handing it to Oikawa who hummed coolly in response, placing the folder away once more. Akaashi began to make his way over to the lounge, feeling as if he needed to unravel somehow.

The boy was obviously strange. Of all the humans he could have been assigned, he got assigned the one that had some kind of defect. Bokuto Koutarou was a complete mess, even for a boy his age. His life was honestly all over the place and it drove Akaashi mad.

As he made his way through the illuminated doorway, something beating heavily in his chest and hands shivering, one thought rang in his head: Why was he so bothered by this boy anyway?

One thing was for certain though. Akaashi definitely felt something… different, something new after that encounter. He couldn’t be sure what it was though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading~! :D As always you can find me @ my twitter tetsookie and tumblr greendoodle~ Thanks for all your lovely feedback so far ^^ I'm running behind (even more so XD) but, the next update will (hopefully) come soon!!


	3. Fly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“Keiji, I’m taking your folder back,”_
> 
> _Akaashi blinked. “What?”_
> 
> _Oikawa turned, heading out of the doorway once more. “It’s too dangerous for you. I’ll give you another assignment.”_
> 
> _“Um!” Akaashi started, suddenly feeling very embarrassed by the small number of things he had documented. “Who’s it going to go to?”_
> 
> _Oikawa didn’t reply, disappearing in a flash of bright light. Akaashi felt his shoulders slump._
> 
> _“Great.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok i lied it's gonna be 7 chapters after all XDD I did some final planning last night and it came out perfectly to 7 so! *thumbs up*
> 
> Up til now, it has mostly been concept explaining and not much plot--from here on forward, it will be very plot driven! ;) so look forward to that~ for now, enjoy the shortest chapter (only shortest by a hundred words or so XD) this chapter was hard to write T T

“Oikawa,”

“Mm,”

“Oikawa.”

“…”

“Oikawa- _san_?”

Oikawa lifted his head from his arms and gave the short figure clothed in a white kimono in front of him a sad smile. “Mm.”

“Oikawa-san,”

“…”

“…let’s go home.”

_Home?_

“Oikawa-san?”

“…yeah.”

Slowly, Oikawa stood up from the brick wall where he had been sitting and followed the robed figure in front of him as they plunged back into perpetual brightness.

“Oikawa-san,”

Oikawa made a small noise of recognition.

“You can cry if you need to.”

A strangled sob made its way out of Oikawa’s throat. He stopped walking, curling into himself and burying his face into his hands. He didn’t know he could cry this much, he didn’t know he could feel this broken.

He could feel the eyes from his friend on him, but he didn’t care. It didn’t matter. Nothing was right anymore.

“…-chan,” he choked, the tears falling freely from his eyes. “I…”

_I lost him._

 

* * *

 

 

“Wait, you’re saying he _actually_ saw you?”

Akaashi nodded once, a little apprehensively. He was sitting on the couch with Kenma in the lounge that was currently empty. The shorter boy set aside the game console in his hands which disappeared with a small poof.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, he could even describe what I looked like and everything,” Akaashi responded.

“Huh,” Kenma paused, looking at nothing in particular. “I’ve never had that happen before.”

“Has it happened to anyone else here?”

Kenma blinked and then looked down. “One person, but other than him, not that I know of.”

Akaashi sat up a little straighter in his seat. “Who??”

“Oikawa,”

Akaashi felt his shoulders slump. “He… probably won’t tell me anything, huh?”

“What about me, Kozume-chan?”

The two on the couch jumped in response to the voice. Oikawa had appeared from the illuminated doorway and walked over to them before they had realized.

“Ah, Oikaw—” Akaashi began.

“Kozume-chan~” Oikawa hummed, handing the guardian a file. “Your new assignment~”

Kenma stared at the file blankly before grabbing it and nodding solemnly. Akaashi thought he saw a hint of hope flicker for a brief moment in the guardian’s eyes.

“You can start whenever you want, or whenever you don’t want. It doesn’t really matter to you, does it?” Oikawa sang as he turned and started to head back out of the room.

“Oikawa-san,” Akaashi started once more, getting up from the couch.

“Yes, Keiji-chan?”

“Kenma told me that your human is able to see you. Could you tell me about that?”

Akaashi saw something dark flit through Oikawa’s eyes, but it was so quick he wondered if he had only imagined it. Oikawa stared at him for a moment too long and Akaashi felt as if he were being scrutinized.

“Why do you ask that?”

“Um, my human can see me too,”

Oikawa continued to stare at Akaashi. Akaashi was starting to feel extremely uncomfortable under the man’s unwavering gaze.

“…Oikawa-san?”

“Keiji, I’m taking your folder back,”

Akaashi blinked. “What?”

Oikawa turned, heading out of the doorway once more. “It’s too dangerous for you. I’ll give you another assignment.”

“Um!” Akaashi started, suddenly feeling very embarrassed by the small number of things he had documented. “Who’s it going to go to?”

Oikawa didn’t reply, disappearing in a flash of bright light. Akaashi felt his shoulders slump.

“Great.”

“Upset about the transfer?” Kenma looked up at him from the couch. “Were you attached to your human?”

“Not… particularly,” Akaashi managed to sigh, going back to sit with Kenma on the couch. “I just feel like I could’ve done a little better job at documenting.”

Kenma gave him a look. “You’re surprisingly more perfectionistic than you look, huh.”

Akaashi made a face. “Not any more than any other person, I don’t think.”

“Hm,” Kenma responded, opening up his folder to look at the contents. Akaashi wondered if it would be rude to look.

Before he could ask though, Kenma snapped the folder shut and got up from the couch. “Well, I’m going.”

“Already?” Akaashi asked, feeling a little lonelier despite the fact the shorter guardian had not left yet.

Kenma merely nodded in response.  After giving Akaashi a short wave, he disappeared into the illuminated doorway as well.

Akaashi slumped on the couch a little. Now what?

He was in the same place as Kenma, a guardian without a folder, a worker with no purpose, someone who had nothing to ‘live’ for. Not that he was alive by any means.

He looked down at his hands. If only he could summon something to pass the time like the others could.

There was a flash behind him and upon turning around to see what it was, Akaashi spotted Tsukishima’s lanky form emerging from the light. Akaashi turned back, closing his eyes. He wasn’t THAT desperate for the company.

He heard Tsukishima sigh and heard a pop. Akaashi assumed that the blonde had summoned his headphones. There was a shuffling of weight on some cushions and then all was silent once more.

Akaashi cracked an eye open to see Tsukishima with his head thrown back, eyes closed, listening to his headphones. Akaashi smiled slightly. He was glad that despite how cheeky the guardian was, Tsukishima seemed to value comfortable silence between people just as much as he did.

“AGHHH, I’m EXHAUSTED,”

Well, the silence was nice while it lasted.

Akaashi didn’t even have to look up to see who had made that exclamation as the man in question plopped down heavily on the couch across from him.

“How was your day, Tanaka-san?” Akaashi asked, as politely as he could. Tsukishima had his face scrunched up in annoyance, but Tanaka didn’t seem to have noticed.

“Boring as heck,” Tanaka groaned, kicking his feet back. “My human is such—”

He stopped, looking around to see if Oikawa was there and then finding it safe to speak, sat up straight to whisper something in Akaashi’s general direction.

“He’s a college student now and all he does is work. Honestly, I’m half-tempted to jump a few years, but he’s working with this cute girl so I’m sticking through best I can.”

Akaashi blinked. “Jump a few years?”

“Yeah,” Tanaka huffed, leaning back into the cushions and throwing his feet on the table once more. “You didn’t think we had to stay with our humans for all 100 years, did you?”

He did actually, but he wasn’t going to admit that.

“Can you please explain how that works, Tanaka-san?”

Tanaka seemed surprisingly happy to comply, bursting in pride about being the senpai in the room.

“So, unless you jump time, you’re going to be stuck going day by eventless day and that’s no fun. When you jump time though, you are brought to every major injury or mishap that your human has during their life time. Sometimes it’s only a few days or weeks, other times, it’s entire months or years.”

Akaashi sat closer to the edge of his seat, soaking in all the new information. “So how do you do it?”

“Oh, basically, you bend your folder in half, not completely, but enough so that when you let go, it can spring back and a few extra informational pages will be added,” Tanaka brought his hands together to mimic the motion. “Just some pages that have new photos if it’s been a few years or stuff like graduation, divorce, whatever.”

“It does that automatically?”

“Yeah,” Tanaka shrugged.

“What’s the point of documenting anything then?”

“I don’t know, man, don’t ask me.”

Akaashi sat back on the couch, brows furrowed in deep thought. It didn’t seem as if the guardians were even DOING anything. If the folders were half-sentient enough to catalog every important event in the human’s life regardless of their input, what was the point of documenting at all?

“So, wait, is time just… some kind of construct here?”

Tanaka stared at him. “If you mean time doesn’t matter, then yeah.”

“How long have you had your human?”

Tanaka frowned slightly. “Uh… like, four days?”

Akaashi gaped at him. “And he’s already in college?”

“Well,” Tanaka rubbed the back of his neck. “I got him high school freshman year so… yeah?”

“Okay, wait,” Akaashi shook his head, trying to put the pieces together. “Oikawa-san is the one who gives us our assignments right? How does he decide? Is it just random? Or is someone else telling him? What determines—”

“Akaashi-san, please keep it down,” Tsukishima droned from his chair.

Akaashi snapped his mouth shut, feeling a little heat in his cheeks. He hadn’t noticed he had been getting progressively louder with every question he was asking. Tanaka was staring at him with eyes as wide as saucers. Akaashi closed his eyes and murmured out a small ‘apologies.’

“You’re the second person we know of who came here with memory loss,” Tsukishima sighed, taking off his headphones to look directly at Akaashi. “We understand you’re confused, but we know exactly why we’re here so please don’t question it. Some of us have real problems to worry about.”

Akaashi paused, giving Tsukishima a look. “Why ARE you guys here?”

Tanaka gave a nervous laugh. “Ah… well…”

Tsukishima closed his eyes and placed his headphones back on his ears.

“We shouldn’t talk about it,” Tanaka mumbled.

“Why not?”

Tanaka gave a sheepish smile. “King’s orders.”

“Oikawa-san?”

Akaashi felt a bit befuddled as Tanaka gave him a shy nod. Oikawa was the same as whatever they were and yet he was acting as some sort of authority figure to them all. He was getting sick at the lack of answers he was getting.

“Whatever,” Akaashi said, turning away from the two of them and curling into himself on the couch. He let his eyelids fall, but for some reason he couldn’t sleep.

_Ah, right. I don’t have a human anymore._

As Akaashi learned from Kenma the other day after his shared nightmare with Bokuto: No human, no dreams, no sleep.

He lay there until he heard Tanaka fall asleep and Tsukishima’s music die down as well. Akaashi heaved a heavy sigh, tossing and turning on the cushions. He wondered when Kenma would get back. He furrowed his brows.

It was going to be a long and grueling wait until his next assignment.

 

* * *

 

 

Kenma wasn’t sure what to expect from a name like ‘Hinata Shouyou.’

The smiling photos in the file made him think of his first human. The boy had the same goofy smile that stretched from ear to ear except that this human had a fluffy orange head as opposed to the white one that Kenma remembered.

 _All humans are the same_ , Kenma mused, watching as his clothes dissolved into those familiar white robes as he walked. _They’re like insignificant, dumb ants you don’t pay attention to. Whatever they do, they don’t make any difference._

The white light around him began to fade and he found himself outside an indoor gymnasium. He blinked, taking the time to look around. He seemed to be at a small school in the countryside given by how rural the nearby surroundings looked. He could hear the squeak of shoes from inside the gym along with some cries of ‘don’t mind’ and ‘one more’.

Kenma went to the entrance and looked in, spotting several volleyballs scattered across the floor. He looked around for his human and spotted him just as he ran and leapt to spike a ball.

Kenma felt his eyes go wide. The kid could definitely jump. Wasn’t he like 5’4 or something? And yet, there he was flying across the gymnasium as if he had wings…

That is, until he landed smack-dab in the middle of the net, letting out a cry of surprise.

A taller, angrier looking guy yelled a few insults his way as Hinata slumped on the floor, cradling his head (and wounded pride). Kenma felt a soft laugh escape his lips and he paused, realizing how surprised he was to even find the entire scene amusing. But, honestly, that was definitely one way to make an interesting first impression.

Hinata grumbled a little, rubbing the back of his head and turning to whine out a response to his fuming teammate. As he did so however, something caught his eye and he looked towards the doorway where Kenma stood.

Kenma froze, wondering if the redhead saw him. The conversation he had with Akaashi earlier flashed through Kenma’s head.

“Hinata, you idiot, what are you looking at?!”

“Nothing!” Hinata retorted after a brief pause, turning his head away from the door and puffing his cheeks out in indignation. He leaped up, making his way back to the end of the court. “One more, Kageyama!”

“Get it right this time, you idiot!”

“I will!!”

Kenma let out the breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding. That was certainly… something else. The way the boy’s golden-brown eyes had flashed as if he had seen Kenma standing there was indescribable. The light from the windows had caught in his eyes, making them dance with a fire Kenma wasn’t sure humans were able to have. He didn’t even know what to think. He shook his head to clear his thoughts and then made his way from the doorway to the back of the gymnasium.

Having a full view of the gym, Kenma crouched down and observed. He laid the folder out in front of him, reading more into the description of his human. Apparently, Hinata had a little sister. He had only recently gotten into Karasuno high school as a freshman and was accepted into the school’s volleyball team.

Kenma mindlessly flipped through some of the older pages, only taking time to register the boy’s face in the pictures that were growing younger and younger until he reached infanthood.

 _Excitable_ , Kenma thought, a pen popping out of thin air. He grabbed it, making a bullet point on the lined paper and writing down the description. _Jumps high for his height._

A loud garbled noise echoed across the gymnasium as Hinata once again fell face first onto the shiny floor. The Kageyama boy was yelling at him again. Kenma stared and then jotted down: _Unpredictably clumsy._

Kenma sighed, letting go of the pen and watching it disappear with a quiet ‘puff.’ The kid was definitely a lot like his first human. The only real difference probably lay in Hinata’s height.

Standing up, Kenma brushed off the bottom of his robes before shaking the contents of his file. He’ll just document the best he can and then leave the boy be. He probably wasn’t documenting properly, but he couldn’t be bothered with another excitable train wreck. He decided he would just fast forward to any significant moments in the kid’s life and then move on from there.

Just as the last of his surroundings dissolved into white, he heard a resounding smack and looked to see a volleyball making contact with the floor opposite of the net where the two players were. As soon as Hinata landed, both feet firmly on the ground, he shot Kageyama a look with eyes sparkling, wide and eager.

Kenma felt something leap in his chest. He frowned, looking at the area that used to hold his now non-existent heart. That was weird… and oddly unnerving.

He was surrounded on all sides by brightness once more and he heaved a heavy sigh. It was probably not something he should be too concerned about. Just like all his other humans, this one will probably fade from his memory as well. It was only a matter of time.

His feet carried him back to the office where Oikawa was waiting, deep in concentration over something on the desk. Kenma stood patiently in front of the man before Oikawa turned to look at him.

“Ah, Kozume-chan,” he hummed, voice sounding a little worn. “How was it?”

“Fine,” Kenma stuck the folder out for the guardian to grab.

Oikawa took the folder and swiveled around in the chair to place it in its appropriate category.

“Oikawa-san, are you alright?”

Oikawa jolted a bit and then turned to look back at Kenma. “Yes, why do you ask Kozume-chan?”

Kenma stared at him for a moment longer before looking down at the desk to see what Oikawa was doing before he had walked in.

There were a few papers scattered here and there, all coming from a folder that was clearly labeled ‘Bokuto Koutarou.’ He looked back up at Oikawa.

“Are you the new guardian?”

Oikawa waved a hand dismissively.

“Hm,” Kenma responded, refusing to budge from where he was standing. “Is it because of what happened with—”

“KOZUME?”

Kenma stared at Oikawa, waiting for the man to continue.

“Could you go check on Futa-chan?”

Kenma paused.

_He’s avoiding it again._

Kenma nodded, a pen popping out of thin air to rest easily in his hand. He headed to a drawer at the side of the room and opened a column to reveal a bunch of empty folders. Taking one, he wrote ‘Futakuchi Kenji’ on the label and watched as the folder shook once and then glowed in sync with the light from the door before reverting back to normal. A single paper was stapled inside.

“Then,” Kenma said, heading towards the door.

Oikawa waved from his seat at the desk, his focus back on the papers in front of him.

“Don’t lose that folder, Kozume-chan,” he called out as Kenma’s figure became bathed in the white light.

Kenma nodded. “I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been feeling somewhat discouraged abt my writing so I'm taking a small break for a few days before the next update!  
> It's no wonder I don't update frequently in general XDD
> 
> Thank you all for reading though!! I'll try to get back into it as soon as possible! *salutes


	4. Dejection

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“If you wanted to know,” Tsukishima began, refusing to look Akaashi in the eye. “The first person who came here with amnesia was someone who we considered to be Oikawa-san’s second-in-command.”_
> 
> _“Did he disappear?”_
> 
> _“Yeah,” Tsukishima continued. “We all thought he’d take over after Oikawa-san disappeared, but after a certain… incident, we never saw him again.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I suck at picking out these chapter summaries XD
> 
> Also, I'm only on day 4 of Bokuaka week when today is the last day hhh.. don't worry though! I'm writing the fifth chapter right now and the fic will continue until I get through all the prompts (even if I'm late)!

“Keiji-chan, meet Futa-chan!”

Akaashi blinked as a tall man with ash brown hair nodded towards him. The man had bangs naturally parted in the middle with eyes that matched the color of his hair. He looked just as problematic as Tsukishima.

“Futakuchi Kenji,” the man said casually, continuing to look Akaashi over as he asked Oikawa a question. “What’s _he_ in here for?”

Ignoring the question, Akaashi gave a slight bow in response. “Akaashi Keiji.”

“We thought he had disappeared, but he was just fooling around in the real world with his human,” Oikawa hummed, giving Futakuchi a smile that sent shivers down Akaashi’s spine. “He didn’t even tell me his human could ALSO see him.”

“Is that such a big deal?” Futakuchi mumbled, shoving his hands in his suit pants. “Beats staying here.”

Oikawa turned to Akaashi who was now giving Futakuchi a much closer look. “We guardians can’t stay in the real world for long unless we are within thirty feet of our assigned human.”

Akaashi looked at Oikawa. “What happens if we exceed thirty feet?”

Oikawa shrugged. “We just get moved back fifteen feet closer.”

“I see…”

“On that note,” Oikawa smiled, turning to Futakuchi. “I’ll need to give you another assignment as well.”

Futakuchi frowned. “Why?”

“It’s too dangerous for you Futa-chan, I’d rather like it if—”

“You’re not my boss, Oikawa.”

Oikawa stared for a second before his facial features settled into a pleasant-looking smile once more. “Don’t say that Futa-chan, I only want to keep you safe.”

“From what?” Futakuchi pressed, a vein twitching in his head.

“I…”

“What do you know Oikawa? You’re literally the same as us. Just because you lost your human once doesn’t mean everyone else will follow!”

Akaashi froze. Even though the rest of the guardians were not present in the lounge, the three of them together like this created an extremely tense atmosphere. What did he mean Oikawa lost his human…?

“…Futakuchi,” Oikawa began, a little softer this time.

Futakuchi made a small ‘tch’ noise in response and turned to head out the illuminated doorway. “I’m going back. _And_ I’m taking _my_ human’s folder with me too.”

The two watched silently as he left, and then Oikawa gave a very audible sigh of exasperation. “Honestly…”

“Um, Oikawa-san,” Akaashi started, but stopped abruptly as the man in question spun around and lay a hand on Akaashi’s shoulder.

“Now then Keiji-chan, your assignment?”

Akaashi nodded, swallowing the unanswered questions simmering in his mouth. Even as Oikawa continued to exude this sense of authority, Akaashi wondered if the other man had always felt this… small.

“Give me a little more time,” Oikawa hummed, tapping his own chin lightly. He seemed to be ignoring the fact that there had been a fight just moments before in this same room. “I want you to tag along with some of the others.”

“What do you mean?”

“Just follow a guardian around for a bit until I sort things out,” Oikawa said, smiling.

Akaashi shifted uneasily on the couch. “Without a folder?”

“Don’t worry,” Oikawa sang, leaning against the couch. “It’s easy enough to find lost guardians.”

“Is… how did you find Futakuchi?”

Just as Akaashi asked the question, a light shone from the doorway and Tanaka entered, stretching lazily with his eyes closed.

“Baldy?”

Tanaka blinked and then upon seeing Oikawa, slumped a little. “Oh, it’s you.”

“Would you do Keiji-chan a favor and teach him all you know the next time you head out?”

“Wha—”

Oikawa walked over to him and pat him once on the shoulder before disappearing out the entrance as well. “I’m counting on you as the senior~”

Tanaka’s eyes lit up. Akaashi silently cursed Oikawa for the trouble he was inevitably going to get into. Tanaka laughed out loud, strutting over confidently to smack Akaashi on the back. Akaashi felt the wind knocked out of him.

“Sure thing, of course I can help you!” Tanaka laughed, making his way to the doorway. “Let me just grab my folder!”

Akaashi sighed as he watched the guardian disappear and slowly got up from the couch. He would not have minded tagging along with Kenma or someone more manageable, but Tanaka was sort of…

He made his way to the entrance and upon entering found himself in the office room once more. Tanaka was already there, shuffling through some of the shelves behind Oikawa as the man was focused on something on the desk in front of him.

“There,” Tanaka exclaimed, grabbing a folder from the ‘E’ section and walking over to where Akaashi stood near the illuminated door. “Let’s go!”

Akaashi blinked. “Already?”

“Do you have anything better to do?”

Akaashi sighed, shaking his head and following Tanaka as he made his way into the surrounding brightness.

 

* * *

 

 

The walk was short and when their surroundings dissolved around them, Akaashi found the two of them standing in white kimonos backstage at some theatre production show. There were an assortment of props lying on the floor and a few people walking around and talking around them. Some of the people were dressed up while some were giving orders to others.

“That’s him,” Tanaka pointed, his finger making a straight course to a meek, average-looking man with dark brown hair.

“He’s…” Akaashi searched for words, staring at the human’s sleepy face. “Interesting…?”

“Nah, he’s a total mop,” Tanaka huffed, taking the pen that had appeared in the air above his hands. “I like coming here though because of _her_.”

Akaashi turned to see where Tanaka was looking and saw a girl with medium-length black hair and pink glasses. She was talking to a smaller girl with blonde hair and light blue star-shaped accessories.

“She’s one of the actresses,” Tanaka hummed, looking drunkenly infatuated. “Don’t you think the mole looks so sexy? Kind of wish I was _her_ guardian… all the guys give her _looks_.”

 _Aren’t you one of them?_ Akaashi thought, but nodded in agreement anyways.

“What does your human do?”

“Oh, he’s boring. I think he’s one of the directors or something? They’re writing some kind of screenplay right now for a college performance.”

“Huh,” Akaashi looked around at his surroundings to see if he could guess what the performance would be about. He spotted a whole hanger with black robes and matching hats. “It looks… kind of magical almost?”

“Yeah, it’s some sort of wizards and witches thing.”

“Alright!”

The two guardians turned to see Tanaka’s human had clapped his hands loudly, taking the attention of every person in the room. “We’re going to do one final take running through the entire thing so everyone get to your places!”

“Oh shit, we should move,” Tanaka said, gesturing for Akaashi to follow him to the side of the room. “Things get kinda hectic here. Even if no one can see us, we can still reach out and touch them so it’s safest to stay on the sidelines.”

Akaashi nodded and together they made their way to one of the double doors leading from backstage to the actual theater. Before the rest of the cast could grab their things and follow the guardians into the auditorium, Tanaka and Akaashi made their way down to the audience seats and sat down in the chairs, in one of the middle rows.

Soon, the entire production team made their way into the theater from backstage, setting up the scenes, and practicing vocal exercises on the side. The directors and camera crew were last to make their way into the auditorium.

The lights began to dim and the set-up team quietly made their way backstage once more. Akaashi noticed that the blonde girl was among them.

“Alright,” Tanaka’s human called out loudly, a clapboard in his hands, a pen nestled neatly behind his left ear. He clapped the board once, and the sound echoed clearly across the room. “Action!”

The scene unfolded before them: a beautiful tale of a chosen wizard and his friends embarking on a journey to save the world from an evil dark lord. The girl Tanaka was interested in was front and center, captivating the audience with her powerful lines. Even though she was only one of the main character’s best friends, Akaashi had to admit that she was the most impressive actress on stage.

The story itself seemed fairly original and the actors playing were very passionate about their roles. The entire performance seemed to be high-quality, each respective job taken care of effortlessly and with efficiency.

As quickly as it had begun, the last scene ended, the lights dimming and eventually the entire theatre going pitch black. A few people in the audience clapped full-heartedly and the lights came on once more. Tanaka’s human wrote something on a clipboard before going over to talk with the actors and actresses.

“Do you get to watch these performances every time you see your human?” Akaashi asked, turning to Tanaka who had his eye locked on the girl.

“Huh?” Tanaka answered distractedly before looking back at Akaashi. “Oh, yeah, I guess.”

Akaashi thought it would be pointless to ask anything else and he lay back more snugly in his seat, continuing to watch every person do their thing on set.

“Oh, oh!” Tanaka jumped up, making his way hurriedly out of the aisle. “She’s going backstage!”

“…what?” Akaashi stared, watching the guardian sprint towards the double doors after the female figure. “But, your human…?”

“Oh, he’s fine, there’s no chance of him injuring himself to begin with!”

Akaashi sighed, supposing that that was true. He stood up as well, making sure to stick closely to Tanaka as he was the only one with the folder to get back.

When the two went backstage once more, they saw the actress with the blonde girl from before. Tanaka sighed contentedly, sitting on one of the spare boxes near the double doors. “Aren’t they angelic?”

Akaashi didn’t know what else to say or do but sit with Tanaka and watch them as well.

The two seemed to get along fairly well. The black-haired girl was very patient and kind, encouraging her friend as easily as she had acted on stage. The blonde girl in contrast was really clumsy, continuously dropping her clipboard and papers on the floor. Thankfully, she seemed hardworking enough to not be burdensome and the two of them seemed to bounce off of each other’s strengths to carry out successful performances. The blonde said something a bit frantically to the taller girl who giggled a little before bending over to help her pick up the things she dropped.

A voice called out for the actress and she yelled something back before patting the blonde on the head and making her way towards the person who asked for her.

“Let’s go,” Tanaka said, getting up from the box. Akaashi felt as if this were some wild goose chase.

Before he could make his way to follow her however, the double doors opened and Tanaka’s human came through, talking seriously with another one of the directors. In Tanaka’s haste, he had almost run into the man, but instead he veered to the left and fell face first into a rack of clothes standing by.

The noise turned all the heads in the room and Tanaka lay there, a bit disoriented from the fall, an assortment of props scattered around him.

“Where’d you come from? Who are you?”

Akaashi watched as Tanaka’s human knelt in front of Tanaka, a clear frown on his generally sleepy looking face. Tanaka looked up to meet eye-to-eye with him and they stared at each other for a second too long. Akaashi felt a shiver run down this spine.

Déjà vu.

Tanaka quickly took a hold of his folder and shook it hard without responding to the question asked. Akaashi felt his blood run cold. He watched in shock as Tanaka disappeared right before his eyes without him.

“Ennoshita-san?” a voice asked, and Tanaka’s human blinked in confusion before turning to the caller.

“Yes?”

“What happened?”

“I… someone ran into the props, I believe.”

The person looked at the wreckage and then back at Ennoshita. “Who was it?”

“I… I have no clue,” Ennoshita scratched his head in confusion. “I... was it me?”

“Oh,” the person responded, looking sympathetically at Ennoshita and patting him on the back reassuringly. “I know you’re tired, director, but please keep it together before the performance.”

“…right.”

The conversation Ennoshita had had with the concerned college student didn’t register with Akaashi. Instead he merely stared dumbfoundedly at the space where Tanaka had been. The guardian had just LEFT him there. All alone. With no folder.

He stood there a little awkwardly, his fingers on his right fiddling with the fingers on his left. What should he…? Does he just wait? Does he wander? Where would he even go if he did? Where even was he? On some college campus, but where was this college? Tanaka would probably come back right? Or would Oikawa assign the guardian another person now that this ‘Ennoshita-san’ saw him? I mean, it was only for a brief second right? There was no guarantee that—

“You alright, Keiji-chan?”

Akaashi jumped as he came face-to-face with the concerned face of Oikawa. He felt his shoulders slump in relief. “O-Oikawa-san.”

Oikawa sighed in exasperation. “Maybe Baldy wasn’t the best teacher for you,”

“How… how did you find me?”

Oikawa held up a folder that had a single paper stapled on the inside. The label indicated ‘Akaashi Keiji.’

“I have a folder as well?”

“Not exactly,” Oikawa hummed, tucking the file under his arm. “It’s just a blank folder more or less, but once we write a guardian’s name on the indicator, we’re able to go to where they are. Well, as long as they haven’t disappeared yet.”

Akaashi nodded slowly, watching as Oikawa shook the folder once, their surroundings dissolving into white.

“What’s the paper?”

“Oh, you want to see?” Oikawa responded, handing Akaashi his folder as they began to walk. Akaashi opened it, unsure of what to expect.

Inside, there was a picture of him, his face the same constant age he was in the office and the lounge. There were a few statistics about him: his date of birth, his hair color, blood type, and the like. There was a line of text that was blurred under the facts and below that, there was a bullet point that read: Bokuto Koutarou. Other than that, the folder was completely empty.

“You should have seen Baldy’s face when I asked him where you were,” Oikawa laughed a little, holding out his hand to take the folder back. “He was so spooked about his human seeing him he totally forgot about you.”

“I noticed,” Akaashi responded, a little dryly.

“Ha, well,” the two reached the office room once more and upon doing so, Akaashi’s folder disappeared in a poof. Oikawa wrung his hands and gestured for Akaashi to follow him out the door once more. “There’s more than one guardian for you to learn from.”

 

* * *

 

 

“No,”

“Oh, don’t be like that Kei-chan,” Oikawa whined, leaning onto the blonde’s lanky form. “Keiji-chan needs you just as much as you probably need him!”

Tsukishima made a face, looking at Akaashi. “I refuse to babysit two people at once.”

Akaashi bristled a bit at being called a child, but shook it off quickly, looking at Oikawa with a pleading look in his eyes. “Oikawa-san, can I just go with Kenma? I get along much better with him.”

“Ah, but Kozume-chan isn’t here right now, is he?”

“Yes, but I can wai—”

“Tut, tut, tut,” Oikawa began, shaking a finger in front of him. “Kozume-chan has only just started with his human, hasn’t he?”

“I… suppose,” Akaashi admitted.

“I refuse,” Tsukishima repeated, folding his arms, and leaning back in his chair. He summoned his headphones and lay them over his ears.

Oikawa pouted, his hands on the couch where Akaashi was sitting. Tanaka was across from him as usual. He had fallen asleep after nervously apologizing for leaving Akaashi behind on his assignment.

“I guess,” Oikawa sighed, leaning heavily on the couch and speaking loud enough for his voice to reach past Tsukishima’s music. “I’ll just tell Keiji-chan all of Kei-chan’s embarrassing stories to make myself feel better…”

Tsukishima’s headphones disappeared in a pop and he stood up, his face scrunched up in annoyance, cheeks flushed slightly. He looked at Akaashi for a brief moment before heading towards the illuminated doorway. “Meet me in the office.”

“That’s the spirit, Kei-chan!” Oikawa called after the blonde as the tall figure disappeared in a flash of light.

“Is… that alright?”

Oikawa smiled at Akaashi. “Of course! He has nothing better to do anyways and neither do you, right?”

“Right…” Akaashi looked down at his fingers before standing up to follow Tsukishima into the office.

When he reached the office, Akaashi found the suited man waiting for him, clutching his folder tightly. Akaashi nodded, and the two made their way back out of the doorway into the whiteness.

The walk was quiet and a little bit awkward in Akaashi’s opinion. Tsukishima kept his eyes straight forward and he was picking at the nails on one of his hands as his other held onto the files. Akaashi smiled a little, finding it a little more than pleasant that they shared the same bad habit.

The light dissolved around them and Akaashi found the two standing at the entrance to some sort of lab. There were test tubes all over the place and people were bustling about in front of their respective tables, dressed in white coats. It wasn’t exactly loud, but it wasn’t quiet either. There was a quiet, intense atmosphere around the room as the people focused on keeping the liquids from spilling as they worked with different chemicals. Everyone was wearing safety goggles. They all seemed to be young high school students.

Without a word, Tsukishima went to a collection of nearby stools that were empty and sat, watching a teenager with messy hair fiddle with some bubbling flasks. Akaashi sat down next to him, looking at the human as well. There was something about that hair that seemed oddly familiar to Akaashi…

“Kuroo,” another teen slid up to the rooster-head, pointing at something on a piece of paper. “Did I do this right? The numbers aren’t adding up…”

“I thought you were the one who was better with numbers, Bo,” Kuroo responded, leaning over to look at the sheet in his friend’s hands. Akaashi stood up in realization.

“Is that?”

Tsukishima looked at him in confusion before looking back at the two students. “What?”

“Oh, I thought…” Akaashi sat back down, slightly embarrassed. “Nothing.”

Tsukishima frowned at him. “Was he your last human?”

“Ah, yeah,” Akaashi admitted, fiddling with his fingers in his seat. “The zebra-haired disaster.”

“I see,” Tsukishima responded, looking more closely at the two of them.

The two guardians sat silently watching both of the humans’ backs as they worked on their lab reports. Among the low din of noise, Tsukishima spoke up quietly.

“He’s okay,”

Akaashi looked at him. “Who?”

“…my human.”

“Oh,” Akaashi said, observing the crazy mess of hair once more. “Did you not like your last humans?”

“I killed them.”

Akaashi’s eyes widened and he turned to look at Tsukishima. “What?”

Tsukishima shrugged. “I killed them.”

“Yes, I got that, but why?”

Tsukishima stared back. “Why not?”

Akaashi paused and then looked down at his hands, wondering if he could do something like that so easily. “Like Kenma, huh?”

“Kenma-san?” Tsukishima blinked. “Kenma-san hasn’t killed anyone.”

“What?” Akaashi frowned, giving Tsukishima a look. “I thought he had? What about his first human?”

“Oh, the annoying guy?”

Akaashi laughed softly. “Did everyone think he was annoying?”

“Just loud,” Tsukishima shrugged, looking back at Kuroo, a small smile growing on his face. “He got transferred to another guardian.”

“Who?”

“He already disappeared. I guess you can ask Kenma-san about it if you’re _really_ curious.”

“I’ve _been_ really curious for a while,” Akaashi deadpanned.

Tsukishima exhaled out of his nose, a laugh dancing in his eyes. “Sorry.”

Akaashi blinked before smiling at the blonde. “It’s alright. Thanks for bringing me here.”

“Orders,” Tsukishima mumbled in response, turning his face away from Akaashi. Akaashi was sure he saw a faint red behind the guardian’s cheeks. He closed his eyes, smiling to himself. Tsukishima was actually quite pleasant once you get past all the sass.

“BOKUTO, STO—”

A loud resounding boom rumbled across the classroom. Both guardians jumped up, looking towards the area where the sound originated which was coincidentally... or maybe, not so coincidentally where the two teenagers were.

Thankfully, the explosion was not too bad, but both Kuroo and Bokuto were unmistakably winded by the noise, hair fluffed up, eyes wide and beady, hands splayed across the floor where they had landed. There were glass shards all over the ground.

The teacher stormed closer, a bit of worry etched into her features, but moreso anger. She stopped in front of the two and barked out a reprimand, asking who in blazes was responsible for this unwarranted experiment.

Bokuto whined, and Kuroo gave him a firm pat on the back. The teacher glared at the mess of black and white hair on the boy’s head before asking him to follow her outside. Bokuto looked back at Kuroo with eyes wide in fear. Kuroo smirked and then wished him good luck. Akaashi couldn’t help but think the face that Bokuto made was quite amusing.

As Bokuto walked towards the front of the classroom, he seemed to spot Akaashi and stared, a curious look crossing over his golden eyes. Akaashi shrunk a little under the gaze, immediately sure that the teenager could see him. Which… honestly, given Akaashi was not Bokuto’s assigned guardian anymore was impossible.

…Wasn’t it?

When Bokuto disappeared out of the door, Akaashi looked back at Tsukishima who he found to be hovering around Kuroo. The rooster-head was brushing himself off and salvaging what he could of their lab report, seating himself back on the stool at the table.

Tsukishima came back to Akaashi, seating himself next to his fellow guardian and sighing heavily.

“Honestly, my human can handle himself most of the time, but he won’t stop hanging out with that Bokuto boy and that’s when the chaos starts. I don’t understand why they stick together.”

Akaashi wondered that too. He glanced at Kuroo who was now wiping down their table with a brown cloth. “Just checked him for fatal injuries?”

Tsukishima nodded, holding up the folder in his hands. “Shall we go?”

Akaashi looked back one last time at the entrance where Bokuto was still being scolded from behind the window. If he continued following Tsukishima from time to time, he had as many chances as he wanted to see if Bokuto still remembered him. Though, the likelihood was definitely low and he wasn’t sure why the boy continued to interest him even now. He stared for a moment longer before glancing back at Tsukishima and giving him a smile. “Yeah.”

Tsukishima shook the folder and they were surrounded by brightness once more. The two began to walk side-by-side back to the office.

“If you wanted to know,” Tsukishima began, refusing to look Akaashi in the eye. “The first person who came here with amnesia was someone who we considered to be Oikawa-san’s second-in-command.”

“Did he disappear?”

“Yeah,” Tsukishima continued. “We all thought he’d take over after Oikawa-san disappeared, but after a certain… incident, we never saw him again.”

Before Akaashi could ask Tsukishima anything more, the two of them stepped foot into the office once more. Oikawa was still at his desk, looking as if he hadn’t moved an inch since Akaashi had been forced to tag along with Tsukishima and even before that.

Wordlessly, Tsukishima wandered over to the shelf section labeled with the ‘K’s and shoved his folder back in its place. Oikawa looked up suddenly, finally realizing that there were other people in the room with him.

“Ah, Kei-chan, how was it?” Oikawa glanced around the room to confirm Akaashi’s presence as well. “Seeing as Keiji-chan is here too, I’d say it was a success!”

Despite the exclamatory statements, Oikawa looked… extremely tired and way too overworked. Akaashi wondered if the man was working hard for all of their benefits.

Oikawa glanced up at Tsukishima. “Did you document anything?”

Tsukishima shrugged. “Wasn’t anything to document.”

“I see,” Oikawa responded easily, looking back at the papers on his desk. He shuffled through a few of them, organizing them in some kind of formation. He stopped briefly, looking back at both guardians.

“Oh, Kenji disappeared while you guys were gone.”

Tsukishima paused and then nodded in recognition. Akaashi furrowed his brows. Wait… Kenji?

“Who’s that?” Akaashi asked, a little apprehensively.

Oikawa blinked back at Akaashi. “Why, Keiji-chan, you met Kenji earlier!”

_Earlier…?_

All Akaashi could recall from earlier was the figure of a tall, suited man with brown hair. Was his name Kenji? He could have sworn it was something else…

Tsukishima walked away from Oikawa’s desk and stopped next to Akaashi. “When guardians disappear, we forget half of their names.”

Akaashi stared. “What?”

“That’s how we tell if we can find them or not,” Tsukishima continued, making his way to head to the lounge. “We can’t write a full name on a folder if we don’t know half of it.”

Akaashi watched as Tsukishima disappeared out of the doorway in a flash of light. He looked down at his hands, slowly clenching and unclenching them. Was something similar going to happen to him as well…? Would the rest of the guardians remember Akaashi or Keiji? Would anyone remember him at all? The same question that had been burning in the back of his mind screamed at him once more: Is it so good for guardians to disappear?

“Oikawa-san,”

“Mm?” Oikawa responded, his focus already back on the papers in front of him.

“What was your second-in-command like?”

Oikawa continued writing for a moment longer before taking a stack of papers and straightening them on the edge of his desk. He gave Akaashi a look. “Did Kei-chan tell you?”

Akaashi flinched. “Not… much.”

A light flashed behind him and Akaashi turned to find Kenma stepping out from the doorway, folder in hand.

“Ah, perfect timing Kozume-chan!”

Kenma gave Akaashi a curt nod before raising an eyebrow slightly at Oikawa. The guardian at the desk grinned.

“Would you take Keiji-chan with you?”

“Wha—”

Kenma paused momentarily, assessing the situation silently before nodding and turning to head back out of the doorway, the same folder in his hands. Akaashi suppressed a sigh and followed after, the same million questions jumbling around in his head.

Once the two had reentered the light, Kenma looked sympathetically at Akaashi. “Was he avoiding telling you something again?”

Akaashi stopped, a little taken aback, but nodded tiredly. “Yeah, I asked him about his second-in-command.”

“Oh, Shigeru,” Kenma mused, walking a little more slowly. “Yeah, Oikawa doesn’t like bringing him up because it reminds him of the time he lost something special.”

“…his human?”

Kenma gave him a look. “Who told you?”

“Kenji did,” Akaashi responded and immediately felt as if something were missing on his tongue. He shut his lips tightly to get rid of the feeling.

“Mm,” Kenma said in deep thought. “Shigeru picked Oikawa up when he was lost in the real world.”

Akaashi felt as if he knew the answer already, but he wanted to make sure. “How’d he get lost?”

Kenma gave him a sad smile and looked forward. “He lost his folder.”

Akaashi looked down at his feet. “I see.”

“We used to call Shigeru something else, but no one can remember,” Kenma shrugged, his suit dissolving into the familiar white robes. “That’s disappearing for you.”

They walked a little further in silence before Akaashi remembered something he wanted to ask. “Oh, Tsukishima mentioned something about a transfer?”

Kenma made a face. “Did he tell you?”

“Yes… you actually didn’t kill your first human?”

“I never said I did,” Kenma stared at Akaashi. “I told you he got into a car accident, I never said he died.”

Akaashi nodded slowly. Thankfully, things were starting to fall into place. Even though he still didn’t understand a lot of what was going on, he was at least getting some of the answers he needed.

Their surroundings dissolved to reveal the hallway of an urban home, the walls and everything around them made entirely of wood. There were some stairs behind them, but before them, there were several doors that lead to different rooms.

“Guess he got home safely,” Kenma murmured, walking forward. Akaashi followed.

Kenma entered the room with the open door halfway down the hall. There, the two found a young ginger-haired boy tapping his foot impatiently at his desk as he worked on what looked to be some homework problems. The window was open, letting in a cool, spring breeze.

“I was just out so I saw him leave school,” Kenma explained, sitting down cross-legged on the floor and inviting Akaashi to do the same. “It’s the same day so I think he’s just trying to finish some assignments.”

The redhead groaned, throwing his head back and dropping his pencil on the floor. From his position on the chair, he stared intently at the volleyball that lay between the two guardians, squinting his eyes in contemplation. Suddenly, he sprang up and grabbed the volleyball, practically leaping out of his seat and out the door.

“Natsu, I’m headed out!”

A young voice responded. “Tell mom!”

“It’s only for a bit!”

Akaashi blinked. It was as if an orange wind had passed by them. Kenma laughed softly. “Yeah, he does that.”

“You seem fond of him,” Akaashi voiced, looking at the open door and then back at Kenma.

Kenma paused, staring at Akaashi before looking back at the empty desk. “Not really. He just…” He gave Akaashi another look that sent chills down his spine. “…interests me.”

“That’s…” Akaashi stopped. He didn’t know if it was good or bad, but Kenma seemed to be content. He opted for a fairly neutral sounding word. “…nice.”

Kenma gave him a smile. “You must be tired.”

“A bit. I’ve been… around.”

“Then, let’s go.”

Akaashi nodded, standing up with Kenma as the shorter guardian shook the folder in his hands. Akaashi watched their surroundings disappear for the third time that day.

The two began walking back in silence. Akaashi was glad that he got to end the day with Kenma. Despite getting closer to Tsukishima, and learning more about Tanaka, he just fit in naturally with Kenma.

When they reached the office room again, Oikawa was waiting for them, staring directly at Akaashi from his seat. The files on his desk were neatly sorted and piled on top of one another. Kenma nodded in Oikawa’s direction before filing his folder back in the section labeled with ‘H’s. Then, noticing that Oikawa wanted to talk to Akaashi alone, made his way to the lounge.

“Keiji-chan,”

“Yes?”

Oikawa gave him a look up and down. Akaashi threw his hands behind his back and fiddled with them uncomfortably. It wasn’t as if his suit had suddenly changed or anything. What was he looking at him for?

Oikawa leaned over to grab one of the files on the desk. “Your assignment.”

Akaashi nodded, walking forward to grab the folder and reading the indicator that read… Bokuto Koutarou? He stared at Oikawa, completely befuddled.

Oikawa sighed, a bit of a sad smile on his lips. “He… he’s been very depressed.”

“What?”

“Dejected maybe?” Oikawa mused, leaning back in his office chair once more.

“Yes, I understand what depressed means,” Akaashi responded a bit dryly, gesturing to the folder. “But why…?”

“After you were taken off the assignment, I jumped a few years to see how he was getting by and he seemed…” Oikawa made a completely unrelated motion with his hands to explain his thoughts. “…upset. The boy he met on the playground that day was nowhere to be found.”

“Well,” Oikawa swiveled around in his chair looking at the other files on the shelves. “You can see for yourself.”

“I… don’t understand,” Akaashi clutched the folder a little tighter. “I thought you said that it was too dangerous.”

“Yeah,” Oikawa responded, his voice sounding heavy with exhaustion and sadness. “But there’s no other choice.”

He turned around to look Akaashi square in the eye, something deep in the brown irises that begged… that pleaded.

“Be careful.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of my favorite comments from my beta reader, bless her soul for taking the time to read these this week T u T  
> "poor Ennoshita xD ur not crazy I promise"  
> "WHO DID U KILL TSUKKI. DID MY SHIP FOR U JUST SINK."  
> "stap w/ the secrets T ^ T both me and akaashi are dying here"
> 
> I also drew something for day 3 (Model/Photographer AU) if anyone wanted to check that out! ;D  
> https://tetsookie.tumblr.com/post/158971568659/day-3-for-bokuakaweek-modelphotographer-or
> 
> Thanks for reading everyone!! :D Anyone have a guess as to who Futakuchi's human is? XDD It's just very lightly implied throughout the previous chapters~


	5. Spring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“Wha…” Akaashi furrowed his brows in confusion. “Wait, so… did you see Oikawa? The one who took over for me for a bit?”_
> 
> _Bokuto shook his head. “Just you.”_
> 
> _“But… why?”_
> 
> _His human looked befuddled. Staring at Akaashi with wide eyes, Bokuto’s voice rang out in concern across the empty park. “You don’t know?”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> //pokes head in  
> hallo.
> 
> it is i.  
> with new content.
> 
> I had a busy year and now that I'm preparing for Anime Expo, I'll be even busier in the coming weeks... my goal is to finish this fic (and update my viktuuri one) before then but who knows XDD ANYWHO! Here's a LONG chapter to make up for my absence haha; on to the gays!

“Oi, shittykawa,”

“Mean, Iwa-chan! Why do you keep calling me that? What’d I do this time?”

“…nothing.”

Oikawa gave the shorter man a look. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

From the floor the figure shrugged, leaning his head back to rest between Oikawa’s legs that were dangling off the bed. “Are you going to leave soon?”

Oikawa stiffened, looking down at the man before relaxing and smirking. “Will you miss me when I go?”

‘Iwa-chan’ frowned, ramming his elbow into Oikawa’s left leg and causing the taller figure to yelp and recoil. “Idiot, of course not.”

“Mean… Iwaizumi Hajime is a big bully!” Oikawa whined, nursing his leg into his chest. Iwaizumi rolled his eyes, pushing Oikawa’s remaining leg up onto the bed.

“Oh shush, it’s not like you can die again.”

The two sat in silence, save for the sound of a ticking clock in the hallway. The sun shone on the windows to the bedroom making for a perfect lazy day. They could hear birds chirping outside and the steady flow of traffic as it carried people to and fro.

“…hey,” Iwaizumi breathed, the words cracking with the low volume. “How come you’re my guardian angel when  _ I’m _ the one who’s taking care of you?”

“What—I take care of you too!”

“Do you?” ‘Iwaizumi smirked, turning around to grin in Oikawa’s direction.

Oikawa pouted, throwing a pillow at the smiling face. “I’m still learning, okay?”

“The leader of the guardian angels is still learning how to do his job, wow, I feel so much safer,” Iwaizumi droned in a mocking tone, laying back against the bed once more.

Oikawa threw himself onto Iwaizumi, pulling at the man’s cheeks angrily. “I’m doing my best! Mean, mean, mean, Iwa-chan!!”

Iwaizumi grunted at the extra weight from Oikawa’s upper body. “Oi, get off Shittykawa!” He wrapped his arms around Oikawa and dragged him down from the bed and onto the floor. The two of them fell onto the carpet with a loud thump.

Oikawa whined, finding himself under Iwaizumi. “Iwa-chan, you brute.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Iwaizumi mumbled, shielding Oikawa’s eyes with his hands and turning away from the guardian. “Y-you work yourself way too hard, you idiot. Take care of yourself more so I don’t worry.”

Oikawa smirked. “I thought you said it didn’t matter since I was dead. …wait, are you blushing?”

“Oh, shut up,”

Oikawa pulled himself up and scooted over to lean against his human. “C’mon, Iwa-chan,”

“What?” Iwaizumi grunted, still refusing to look at the taller man.

“I love you~”

The tips of Iwaizumi’s ears got bright red. Oikawa delighted in seeing them, a bubbly feeling growing in his chest. He put more of his weight onto the man. “Do  _ you _ love  _ me _ ?”

“You’re an idiot,” Iwaizumi said, getting up from his place on the floor, leaving Oikawa to fall over.

“What, Iwa-chan…”

“Tooru,” Iwaizumi sighed, looking down at the guardian. “Is this okay?”

Oikawa felt something twist in his chest. “What?”

“Are  _ we _ okay?”

Oikawa laughed, the sound a bit hollow in his ears. “Of course we are, Iwa-chan, don’t be silly!”

Iwaizumi folded his arms, turning away from Oikawa. “Are you sure it’s  _ me _ who’s being silly?”

“I…” Oikawa swallowed thickly. “I’m not being silly.”

“Are you sure? Nobody else can even see you. I get weird looks when I talk to you in public. You literally cannot be apart from me more than thirty feet or you disappear.  _ We’re _ not normal.  _ You’re _ … not normal.”

Iwaizumi paused, clenching his fists. “Can other humans see their guardians?”

There was silence. Iwaizumi turned to glare at Oikawa. “Well?”

“…no,” Oikawa murmured, sitting cross-legged on the floor and receding more and more into himself. He looked up at Iwaizumi, desperation clear in his eyes. “But, doesn’t that  _ MEAN _ something? Shouldn’t it mean something?? That we’re special or chosen… that this was meant to be somehow?”

Iwaizumi looked away. “I don’t know.”

“Don’t you believe in us, Hajime?”

“I…” Iwaizumi stammered, looking extremely lost and out of place. “I don’t know.”

“Fine,” Oikawa lifted himself off the floor, something hot prickling his eyes. “I’m going then.”

Iwaizumi didn’t respond, only turning away. Oikawa felt the tears spilling onto his cheeks now.

“Mean! Mean, mean, mean, Iwa-chan! I hate you!” Tears streamed down Oikawa’s face. Without looking back, he ran out of the room, hoping from the bottom of his heart that Iwaizumi would follow him.

He didn’t.

 

* * *

 

Akaashi’s surroundings dissolved into what looked to be a park on a breezy, calm spring day. He blinked, wondering if he had gone back to that first day where he had met Bokuto. Since time wasn’t on a continuum in that endless brightness, it was highly possible, right?

Taking the folder in his hands and flipping it open, Akaashi saw a few extra pages had been added since he had first met the boy. There were photos of Bokuto after graduating from elementary and middle school. It looked as if he were currently in his third year of high school. The papers didn’t give much information, only indicating the new skills he learned and years he’d gained. The photos however gave Akaashi the most information.

As every year passed and a new photo was added, Bokuto seemed to be a lot… sadder. His facial features seemed to have sunken in and his golden eyes had lost a lot of the light Akaashi had noticed from childhood. Akaashi wondered what the cause was behind the sudden health drop.

He closed the folder and grasped it in his hands tightly, looking around the park for any sign of Bokuto. If Akaashi was transported here, his human was undoubtedly nearby.

After walking around for a bit, he spotted the unruly mess of hair on one of the swing sets. The teenager was swinging lightly back and forth, his eyes focused on a certain nothingness in front of him. He had a high school uniform on, a gray blazer with matching slacks and a blue tie that wasn’t tied correctly, hanging loosely around his shoulders. Akaashi stood and watched.

Bokuto didn’t seem keen on moving from his seat and instead, continued to idle away in the park even as the sky started to dim, the final rays of sunlight starting to sink around the horizon. Akaashi didn’t even realize the time passed until the sunset’s golden-orange hue caught his eye and made him blink. He rose his arms to shield his sight from the sun.

Finally, Bokuto stood up and after shoving his hands into his pockets, started to make his way out of the park. Just as he turned however, something caught his eye and he turned to meet eye-to-eye with Akaashi once more.

Akaashi blinked a little helplessly as the light continued to hit him. Bokuto stood there, seemingly mesmerized, frozen in time. The two stood facing each other, neither of them certain what to do. Suddenly, Bokuto spoke.

“Are you my guardian angel?”

Akaashi lowered his arms, finding his fingers naturally intertwining to fiddle. “You… can see me?”

Bokuto’s eyes lit up. “You can talk.”

“Yeah,” Akaashi nodded, a little warily. “I can.”

“Can other people see you?”

Akaashi shook his head. “I don’t think so.”

Bokuto began to walk over, his hands leaving his pockets. “Are you real?”

“I… hope I am?” Akaashi admitted, feeling a bit tingly in his feet and looking down. He wasn’t sure if his body was instinctively telling him to run or if it was trying to root him to the place he stood. Bokuto stopped a few feet away from Akaashi.

“Where’d you go?”

Akaashi looked up at him. The teenager’s hair was gelled straight up in a funky formation that kind of made him look like an owl. From this distance, he could see that the boy had formed some rougher edges. He was so much more different than the chubby kid he saw playing on the playground beforehand. Akaashi felt a lump grow in his throat. He threw a hand over his mouth, surprised by the fact that his eyes were starting to prickle with fresh tears.

“Wh-why are you crying?”

“I…” Akaashi responded, laying a hand over his eyes and closing them momentarily. “I don’t know.”

“ _ Are you _ my guardian angel?”

“It’s…” Akaashi shook his head, looking at him once more. “It’s not as romantic of an idea as you’d like to believe.”

Bokuto frowned. “What do you mean?”

Akaashi shook his head again, uncertain how to proceed.

“Then, are you a reaper?”

“Must the two be mutually exclusive?”

Bokuto furrowed his brows, crossing his arms and tilting his head to one side. “Kuroo said that I was seeing a reaper because nobody else could see you.”

“He’s not entirely wrong…”

“But, I told him that you were my guardian angel because you weren’t scary-looking at all! You had the greenest eyes I’d ever seen and the curliest hair too,” Bokuto mused, looking Akaashi over and nodding as if to confirm. “See, I wasn’t crazy!”

“He called you crazy?”

“No… well, not  _ seriously _ , but everyone else did…” Bokuto seemed to slump a little.

“Why… why don’t you tell me everything that happened since I last saw you?” Akaashi suggested, holding the folder a little more tightly in his hands. He wondered if this was a good idea. Something bubbled deep in Akaashi’s chest.

“Can I do that?” Bokuto exclaimed, his eyes going as wide as saucers, a smile stretching from ear-to-ear. Akaashi blinked, a bit taken aback.  _ Much better than the pictures in the folder. _

Akaashi smiled softly and then made his way to a nearby bench. Bokuto followed after him at a distance.

The two sat with a space in between them, Akaashi looking a little out of place in his white kimono, but Bokuto looking extremely happy. Akaashi felt as if he were reuniting with a childhood friend, despite the fact that this was their first actual meeting.

“What’s in the folder?” Bokuto asked, eyeing the files in Akaashi’s hands. Akaashi looked down at them and then set the folder away from the teenager’s reach.

“It’s my ticket back home,” Akaashi said, realizing how strange the word ‘home’ sounded on his lips. He brushed the feeling away. “Nothing important.”

“I see,” Bokuto hummed, swinging his legs from his seat. Akaashi noticed that the boy had some really thick thighs.

“So why did everyone call you crazy?” Akaashi pried, his fingers curling and uncurling around the bottom of the wooden bench. “Is it your hair?”

Bokuto pouted visibly. “No! My hair is awesome!”

“I suppose it’d be easy to spot you in a crowd,” Akaashi smirked, looking at the black and white strands on Bokuto’s head as they stretched towards the sky. “I can’t believe you’ve kept the same hairstyle for so long.”

“What about you?!” Bokuto whined, leaning a little closer to Akaashi. “You look the same as before in your white clothes, you—”

Bokuto paused, staring intently at Akaashi.

“What  _ is _ your name?”

Akaashi felt his shoulders stiffen. “What?”

“Your name! You have one, right?”

“…Akaashi. Akaashi Keiji.”

“Akaashi,” Bokuto mouthed, the words tumbling naturally out of his mouth. His voice came out in a whisper. “Akaashi Keiji.”

“J-just Akaashi is fine,” Akaashi stammered, feeling a strange feeling twist his gut. He knew it was already too late, but was he even supposed to be talking with his human? Oikawa did say it was dangerous. There must have been a reason. Maybe talking to humans causes guardians to implode or something.

“Okay,” Bokuto said, a little quieter. He sat back and looked straight forward, a smile resting easily on his face. “Akaashi then.”

Akaashi nodded, though he wasn’t sure if Bokuto saw. The guardian looked away, staring at some far-off bushes. There was a weird, unsettling  _ something _ in his chest. Maybe he should get back. He was probably breaking a million rules already by even  _ talking _ to his human, much less sitting with him at an arm’s length.

“Hey, um, Akaashi?”

Akaashi turned to look at Bokuto.

“Can I touch you?”

The guardian stared, a bit dumbfounded, heat rising to his cheeks. “What?”

“No, like, just on the arm or something,” Bokuto shuffled his feet, looking extremely uncomfortable. “I… just want to know if you’re real.”

“I…” Akaashi blinked, then looked down at his hands. He wondered if he were real too. “Okay.”

Bokuto swallowed thickly and then scooted over on the bench to get closer to the guardian. Akaashi flinched slightly, but sat there without moving, his eye glued to Bokuto’s hands. The teenager’s fingers were shaking. They hovered hesitantly above Akaashi’s pale, long fingers. Akaashi thought Bokuto’s large hands looked really warm.

“Are you scared?”

“What?” Bokuto jolted, looking Akaashi in the eyes.

“It’s okay to be scared,” Akaashi said calmly, continuing to hold his gaze on Bokuto’s hands. “I’m not normal.”

“No, Akaashi!” Bokuto exclaimed, staring at Akaashi with an intensity in his eyes. “I’m the one who’s not… normal.”

The teenager’s shoulders slumped once more and he sat back on the bench, heaving a heavy sigh, and bringing his arms into himself. “No one else can see you, but I can. Everyone thought I was weird in the head and my parents made me go to all kinds of doctors because I was  _ sure _ I saw you. But, nobody would believe me. And then…”

He gave a sad laugh. “I think I realized that I really  _ am _ crazy. Who knows, I could just be sitting here all by myself talking to an imaginary friend I made up.”

Something compelled him.

Akaashi wasn’t sure what it was, but before he knew it, he had leaned closer to his human and had wrapped his hands around Bokuto’s. The teenager jumped a bit, almost recoiling from the touch, but sat still, staring in awe as their hands cupped around each other’s naturally.

“Does…” Akaashi stuttered, glaring at their hands and refusing to look Bokuto in the eye. “Does  _ that _ feel real?”

Bokuto nodded a little dumbly, rubbing a thumb slowly over Akaashi’s fingers. “Y-yeah. It’s… kind of cold and a little tingly, but… yeah.”

A huge wave of responsibility washed over Akaashi. His thoughts immediately went back to the pictures in the folder where Bokuto’s sad face flashed back at him. He felt an uneasiness. “I’m sorry. It was my fault you got so sad.”

“What?” Bokuto asked, incredulously. “What are you talking about?”

“If I hadn’t shown up in the park that day, you would never have had those problems. You… you’re at your best when you’re smiling. I took away that smile.”

“No, don’t say that!” Bokuto frowned, looking a little put out. “I mean, my parents and my therapist were a bit worried, but it was nice to know I had a guardian angel.”

“That’s,” Akaashi stammered. “That’s not what I am…”

Bokuto shook his head. “You’re my guardian angel.”

Akaashi swallowed thickly, taking his hands back from Bokuto’s. It made him feel a little emptier. Colder.

“I… I can kill you.”

“What?”

“I can kill you.”

Bokuto gave Akaashi a look.

“The things humans know about guardian angels and reapers are all wrong,” Akaashi explained, feeling a bit overwhelmed. “Those entities you guys see as guardian angels are the same entities who take lives as well. We can do whatever we want, no matter good or bad.”

Akaashi gave Bokuto a look. “We’re not good people.”

The guardian looked downwards. “We’re… actually not really  _ people _ at all.”

There was a silence as Akaashi shifted away from Bokuto. The teenager had his eyes down on his hands, clenching and unclenching his fists. Akaashi smiled sadly. He probably shouldn’t have said all that he did, but he was glad that at the very least, he could explain what he knew about the guardians to someone who he felt close to.

“Did you die though?” Bokuto inquired.

“What?” Akaashi blinked, startled by the sudden question.

“Were you a person who died?”

Akaashi nodded slowly. Bokuto gave the guardian a grin in return. “Then, you’re human too!”

“Aaaahhh…” Bokuto stretched his arms, his facial features relaxing. He lay back on the bench, peace settling over him. “I’m glad to know such a great guy is looking after me!”

“What,” Akaashi bristled, frowning hard. “Why aren’t you bothered by this?!”

Bokuto blinked. “What?”

“I can literally just kill you right now if I wanted to! Shouldn’t you be scared? Or upset?”

Bokuto shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “No…?”

“Why not?!”

“‘Cause you obviously wouldn’t kill me, right, Akaashi?”

Akaashi stopped. A voice echoed in his head.

_ But, I’ll have to. _

Bokuto stretched again, getting up from the bench.

“I’m glad I’m not seeing things,” he continued, giving Akaashi a light smile. Something twisted in the guardian’s chest. “I’m glad you’re real, Akaashi.”

Akaashi didn’t know what to say or what to do. He nodded a little blankly in response.

“Ah!” Bokuto exclaimed, an upright fist meeting his palm. “Does that mean Kuroo has a guardian angel too?”

“Yeah… did you see him that one time in lab?”

Bokuto blinked and then something dawned to him. “Oh, I saw you that day I made a huge explosion!”

Akaashi nodded as the teenager laughed, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

“That was last year… You’re always watching me, huh?”

The guardian stammered. “A-actually, that was only the second time I saw you…”

Bokuto blinked, flushing a little. “Oh.”

“Did you see the blonde guy next to me then?”

Bokuto stared at Akaashi. “Blonde guy?”

“Yeah, he’s Kuroo’s guardian.”

“I… didn’t see a blonde guy,” Bokuto said, looking into Akaashi’s eyes. “I only saw you.”

“Wha…” Akaashi furrowed his brows in confusion. “Wait, so… did you see Oikawa? The one who took over for me for a bit?”

“Who?”

“A guy with brown hair, pretty tall, looks quite flamboyant?”

Bokuto shook his head. “Just you.”

“But… why?”

His human looked befuddled. Staring at Akaashi with wide eyes, Bokuto’s voice rang out in concern across the empty park. “You don’t know?”

 

* * *

 

Oikawa was waiting for him when he got back to the office. As soon as Akaashi entered the room with Bokuto’s folder in hand, the man was immediately at his throat, bombarding him with questions.

“How was it Keiji-chan??? How’d it go?? Did he see you?? Did he see me??”

Akaashi took a step away from Oikawa, but the man didn’t seem like he was going to let up. Akaashi sighed, waving the files in the other guardian’s face. “Oikawa-san, a little space if you could.”

Oikawa seemed reluctant, but moved back a few spaces, eyes still glued on Akaashi.

“He said he couldn’t see you or any of the other guardians,” Akaashi said, trying to recall all the details. “He could only see me.”

Oikawa stood there thinking, his arms half-crossed, a frown crossing his features. “The same…”

Akaashi blinked. “Oikawa-san?”

The guardian shook his head. “Anything else?”

“I… ended up telling him a bit about us,” Akaashi admitted, feeling the need to pick at his fingers. “I hope that was alright.”

“He already knows about you so it couldn’t be helped,” Oikawa said conclusively, nodding once. “He wasn’t doing very well without you.”

Akaashi shifted uncomfortably. “I don’t think I made that big of a difference.”

Oikawa shook his head. “My human was the same way. Besides, wasn’t he waiting for you at the same park you guys first met?”

Akaashi opened his mouth to respond, but paused upon realizing the accuracy of his senior’s statement. The park had weathered over the years Akaashi had been ‘gone,’ but, it was definitely the same place where Bokuto had broken his arm as a child.

Akaashi watched as Oikawa made his way back to the desk with exhaustion clear on his face. Akaashi wondered if the guardian had been waiting for him by the door ever since he first left.

“Um, Oikawa-san?”

“Yes, Keiji-chan?”

“Do you… have a human right now?”

Oikawa sat down on the office chair and stared at Akaashi for a moment before turning to a stack of files in front of him. “No.”

“Can I ask what you do exactly?”

Oikawa paused contemplatively, before sighing and setting aside some papers. “I suppose it wouldn’t hurt.”

A spare chair popped up across from Oikawa and after placing his folder back on the shelves, Akaashi made his way to sit on it. As soon as he was seated, Oikawa swiveled around in his own chair to gesture at the shelves behind him.

“As you know already, I manage all the folders here. The shelves contain the files for every single human in this country. I pick out people for the guardians here.”

Akaashi took a moment to glance at all the folders on the shelves. “How do you choose?”

“Intuition?” Oikawa said, turning back around to look at Akaashi. “I think I’ve been pretty good at it since the rates of guardians disappearing has gone up.”

“So, is disappearing good?”

Oikawa shrugged. “It gets us out of this miserable place at the very least.”

“Do you… know how we can disappear?” Akaashi asked, brushing something off of his suit pants.

Oikawa gave him a look. “I’ve figured it out more or less.”

Akaashi’s eyes widened. “Then, you can tell the others and we can all leave our duties, right?”

After taking a moment to glance at the illuminated doorway, Oikawa looked back at him sadly. “Unfortunately, I can’t.”

“Why not?” Akaashi said, feeling his temper rise.

“No, I meant there’s no way  _ I _ can leave,” Oikawa said, a hollow smile on his face. “You guys are on the right track though. At least, I hope. I’m still not entirely sure myself.”

Akaashi took a moment to digest this new information. He always assumed disappearing was bad given how everyone had reacted in response to others disappearing in the past. He supposed it was always a scary experience to go someplace and not know where you were headed.

Oikawa cleared his throat to break the silence. Akaashi looked up at him.

“Are you following him for the next day as well?”

Akaashi nodded. “He… invited me to come with him to see his physical therapist. I know there probably won’t be any fatal issues, but, just in case, you know…”

“I’ll come with you,” Oikawa said, averting his attention to some papers on his desk. “I want to confirm one last thing to be sure.”

Akaashi stared at Oikawa, a strange sense of possessiveness overwhelming him. “He can’t see you.”

“I know,” the guardian coolly responded.

Akaashi felt himself flush and stood up quietly, excusing himself from the room. He wondered why he felt compelled to reiterate that point to Oikawa, but it seemed to have been a good idea at the time.

 

* * *

 

“Why did you pursue this field, Iwa-chan? Someone like you, I feel as if you’d fit better with something physical like being a cop or firefighter.”

“What’s ‘someone like you’ supposed to mean, Shittykawa…” Iwaizumi mumbled, looking up from the book he was reading. The two were sitting in a diner at a table with a booth and window seat.

Oikawa gave Iwaizumi a snarky look before crossing his arms indignantly. “You know what I mean Iwa-chan~ There’s no way a brute like you can keep focused in this kind of—OW!!”

Iwaizumi retrieved the book he smacked into the guardian’s face, flipping it open once more to resume reading. “I’m not really interested in your opinion, thank you very much.”

“Mean!” Oikawa grumbled, nursing the wound on his head. “Shouldn’t you care more? I’m doing this cause I’m looking out for you as your angel, Iwa-chan!”

Iwaizumi sighed and closed the book shut, staring at Oikawa intently. “Explain that to me again? You just showed up out of the blue a week ago claiming to be an angel or reaper or some supernatural shit. Nobody can see you. Nobody can hear you. You just loiter here every day like a smelly, jobless, good-for-nothing leech.”

“I am  _ not _ loitering for your information! Nor am I smelly  _ or  _ jobless! I’m doing very important guardian angel work!”

Iwaizumi raised an eyebrow. “Such as…?”

“That’s…”

Iwaizumi sighed. “Is Hanamaki pranking me again because I swear to God…”

Oikawa huffed, throwing himself back in his seat. “Just the fact that other people can’t see me should be proof enough I’m not human…”

“Uhuh,” Iwaizumi responded, turning his focus back on the book and enveloping the two into silence once more.

Oikawa sighed and resigned himself to watch people bustle by on the streets, as he listened to the quiet clinking of plates, cups, and utensils from the restaurant. He felt as if there were something he needed to tell Hajime. Something that would not only make the man acknowledge the guardian’s existence, but also settle the shaking feeling that Oikawa felt in his gut.

Suddenly, Oikawa threw both of his fists on the table, sitting up eagerly.

“I got it! I’ll tell you how I died!”

Iwaizumi felt a vein bulge in his head, but he sighed heavily and shifted his study materials to the side. “Alright, if it means you’ll be quiet enough to let me study, I’ll listen. Not like you’re going to leave me alone anyways.”

“Mean…” Oikawa murmured before laying back in his seat again. Iwaizumi crossed his arms and gave him a look, prompting the guardian to continue.

“So basically,” Oikawa began, tapping the end of his chin lightly. “I believe I stabbed a guy and he put me into a coma.”

“Woah, what??” Iwaizumi stammered, his eyes wide. “For what??”

“…Cause I stabbed him? C’mon, Iwa-chan, get with the program~”

“No, you idiot, I meant why would you randomly stab a guy?! I didn’t really… like, you’re not… other than being a bit annoying, I didn’t think you were that kind of person?”

Oikawa felt their eyes meet and hold. “What kind of person, Hajime?”

“Well, someone like you…”

“What’s ‘someone like you’ supposed to mean, Iwa-chan?” Oikawa hummed.

“I…” Iwaizumi started, but stopped as he felt the chill of déjà vu. He was sure Oikawa had said something similar. Shaking his head, he grabbed his study materials once more and turned away from the taller man. “Forget it. Just let me study. Thanks for the lovely story.”

“Ehhh… Iwa-chan… the story is true!! And you still haven’t admitted I’m your guardian angel yet!”

Iwaizumi looked up to give him a glance. “More like guardian devil…”

Oikawa pouted. “Iwa-chan…”

Iwaizumi sighed and pat the space next to him on his side of the booth. Oikawa perked up and made his way over to the other side of the table, leaning lightly on the shorter man. In response, Iwaizumi ran the free hand that didn’t hold his book through the guardian’s hair and the two relaxed into each other’s figures. Oikawa felt something settle deep in the depths of his soul and he felt safe… no, not safe… he felt…

“It’s… not too bad having you here.”

Oikawa looked up at him, eyes full of hope. “Really?”

Iwaizumi looked back at his book, his expression softening. “…yeah.”

Before Oikawa could say anything else, Iwaizumi added with a smirk— “Even though you’re some kind of homicidal maniac.”

“What, Iwa-chan, nooo… I’m not! It was literally one guy! That doesn’t qualify as maniacal!”

Without a response, Iwaizumi smacked him lightly on the head before looking back at his study materials. Oikawa blinked a bit, feeling something bubble in his chest. It wasn’t that Oikawa felt safe next to Iwaizumi, but more like…

Oikawa straightened up and stared at the face of his human who was glaring at the books on the table in deep concentration. There was just something about the man that captivated Oikawa. Was it his smile? His looks? Or is it the way he doesn’t back down from any challenge no matter how big? The way that he’s so firm, steady, focused… the way he doesn’t take any nonsense or foolery… the way he has the resolve to be something bigger, greater, even more amazing than he already is… that he can reach those heights.

The guardian looked down at the table where Iwaizumi was furiously writing down notes and flipping through his materials. His hands were big, rough, a bit callused. Something completely unsuited to sitting here in a diner on a Saturday evening, working with papers and pencils. In contrast, Oikawa’s hands were probably perfect for these types of tasks. A bit smooth, long and slender, nails aligned perfectly. Oikawa wondered how his human’s hands would feel like against his own.

Before he had realized it, Oikawa had reached out and grabbed Iwaizumi’s hands in his own. The shorter man let out a short cry of indignation before he was quickly silenced by a pair of lips.

No, Iwaizumi Hajime didn’t make Oikawa feel safe. In fact, Oikawa felt a bit more exhilarated than usual. His chest felt tighter, his breaths were faster, his eyes were more alive. He felt as if he could do anything as long as they were together. He wasn’t restrained anymore, he wasn’t stuck in that empty whiteness. As the two deepened their kiss, Oikawa came to the realization.

Hajime felt like  _ home _ .

 

* * *

 

“I hope you don’t mind if my senior is here with me,” Akaashi said, gesturing to Oikawa who proceeded to wave like a princess. Bokuto looked a little helplessly in the direction Akaashi was indicating and scratched his head.

“Well, ah… I can’t see him.”

Akaashi felt as if some weight was lifted from his shoulders. He didn’t know why he felt that way, but he was strangely glad that Bokuto wasn’t able to see the other guardian. Even though he had learned this already the other day, it was still a relief to see it was true.

“That’s fine,” Akaashi said lightly, sticking close to his human’s side. Oikawa made a noise that sounded like a mix of a snort and a hum. Akaashi chose to ignore him.

From the sidewalk where they met, the three of them made their way into a tall building and up a few floors to a small waiting room. Bokuto whispered for Akaashi to sit in one of the chairs while he talked with the receptionist. The two guardians did so and Bokuto walked up to the empty desk to ring the bell on the counter.

“Coming!” a voice sounded around the corner.

Bokuto loitered around the counter, reading a few pamphlets lying around for patients to grab. Akaashi silently watched Bokuto and Oikawa stared at the two of them in turn.

Soon, a man who looked to be an intern rushed around the hallway and made his way behind the desk. Despite his gray hair, the probably-intern looked very young, an easy smile settling on his face, a single mole under his left eye.

“Sorry about that,” the man huffed before looking up and spotting the patient. “Ah, it’s Bokuto!”

Bokuto smiled shyly. “Hey, Sugawara. Weren’t too busy, I hope?”

“No, no, you’re okay,” Sugawara laughed, holding up a clipboard and handing it to the taller man. “Here for the usual physical?”

Bokuto nodded, taking the clipboard and using the pen attached to write his name.

“No Kuroo today?”

“Nah,” Bokuto shrugged, handing the clipboard back. “He said he had some studying to do.”

Sugawara snickered. “Probably for the best since Daichi is here. You know how he is when you two get loud.”

Bokuto grinned. “Sawamura is pretty fun to hang with.”

“Yeah, well,” Sugawara checked off Bokuto’s name from the clipboard and set it on the desk. He gave the teenager a wink. “He finds the two of you a little more than he can handle.”

As if on cue, another man came from the hallway. This doctor had short black hair and was more broad-shouldered. The moment he spotted Bokuto, he seemed to steel himself both mentally and physically.

“Hey Sawamura!” Bokuto called, his eyes wide, a smile on his face.

“Hey…” Daichi said apprehensively, heading over to grab some files from the desk where Sugawara was. “Physical today?”

“Yeah,” Bokuto responded before turning towards the waiting room and gesturing for Akaashi to come to him. Akaashi gave Oikawa a look that clearly said ‘stay here’ and then got up to stand next to Bokuto.

Seeing that both Daichi and Sugawara were distracted with some papers for a moment, Bokuto leaned over and whispered into Akaashi’s ear.

“We used to play some sports together like basketball. The two of them are fresh out of med school right now, but we know them cause their parents knew our parents.” Bokuto choked back a laugh. “Kuroo said Daichi is just annoyed we’re better than him at everything.”

Akaashi gave Bokuto a small smile. “Is that so?”

“Alright,” Sugawara spoke up, writing something on a stack of papers. “Your therapist will be with you in a second. Take a seat for now.”

“Please don’t trash the magazines like last time,” Daichi grumpily called from behind the desk.

“Daichi,” Sugawara’s voice rang out in apprehension. The taller man behind the desk grumbled. Sugawara leaned in to plant a kiss on the doctor’s cheek. “Hang in there.”

“That was  _ once _ ,” Bokuto whined, but seeing as the two were occupied, elected to follow the intern’s orders. He made his way to sit on one of the couches in the waiting room, Akaashi following right behind him. Both Daichi and Sugawara spoke in a few low whispers before disappearing down the hall.

“What is he here for?” Oikawa murmured in Akaashi’s direction.

“Oh, his muscles got weaker over a few years of neglect so it’s just a precautionary thing,” Akaashi responded, earning a head turn from Bokuto. Akaashi then turned to his human. “I’m explaining you being here to my senior.”

Bokuto nodded enthusiastically, giving Akaashi a thumbs up. Akaashi couldn’t help but think the gesture was at least the slightest bit adorable though mostly just silly—

“Oikawa?”

The three in the waiting room looked up to see a tall man with similarly short, black hair to Daichi’s staring directly at…

Oikawa seemed frozen in time, staring back at the figure in front of them, his mouth open wide in shock. “…Iwa-chan?”

Bokuto looked from the tall man to the empty spot on the cushions where he was looking. Akaashi did the same as his human, but the connection clicked.

“Oikawa-san,” Akaashi began, but was cut off as ‘Iwa-chan’ stormed his way towards the other guardian.

“You piece of shit—”

Oikawa yelped as the man headbutted him right in the head. The guardian recoiled into himself on the couch, both hands nursing the top of his skull. “Iwa-chan, you brute! What was that for?”

“The fuck do you mean, ‘what was that for?!’”

The guardian flinched. “It’s… it was your fault!”

‘Iwa-chan’ scoffed, his imposing form blocking off all the couch’s escape routes. “How was it my fault? You run away and for four fucking years I don’t see you and you just randomly show up with a new human?! How long has it even been for  _ you _ ?! Only a day or two, I bet??”

“No, I…” Oikawa started, looking up at the man, but finding something hitch in his throat. Instead of responding, the guardian simply looked helplessly up at the human, his eyes beginning to well up with tears.

At this, Iwa-chan threw his arms around Oikawa and held the guardian tight. “You idiot.”

Oikawa wrapped his arms around the man’s neck and Akaashi saw tears welling up in his senior’s eyes.

“Doc…?” Bokuto asked the tall man, obviously not seeing the entire scene play out.

Before Akaashi could explain it to him, the doctor shook his head and gave Bokuto a sad smile from his seat on the sofa. “Sorry, I must look like I’m crazy, talking to a couch. You’re here for your physical, correct, Bokuto?”

Bokuto nodded, taking another glance at the empty seat on the couch before speaking. “Is your angel there, doctor Iwaizumi?”

Iwaizumi paused, slightly taken aback before he gave a soft smile. “Yeah.”

He turned to look at Oikawa once more. “Yeah, he is.”

Oikawa made a noise Akaashi didn’t think he’d hear from the senior guardian. The taller man clung onto Iwaizumi, burying his face into his shoulder. Akaashi could see Iwaizumi gently rub circles into the guardian’s back.

“I’m… sorry.” Iwaizumi muttered quietly to no one in particular before turning to Bokuto. “I think we’ll need to reschedule our appointment.”

Bokuto bolted upright in his seat. “No, no, that’s fine! You were reunited with your angel, right?? I know how that feels!”

He sent Akaashi a smile and the guardian felt his breath catch. Iwaizumi watched Bokuto before chuckling a little bit to himself. “I see. Well, um, not really cause I can’t SEE see, but I see.”

“Well,” Iwaizumi looked right through Akaashi, but his gaze held constant in the direction that Bokuto had previously stared at. “I definitely hope that you are a million times more competent than your sorry excuse for a leader here.”

Oikawa whined a small, “hey…”

Iwaizumi snorted, patting the guardian who clung to him on the head. “I’m kidding, Shittykawa. C’mon, I thought you were my guardian angel—shouldn’t you know this by now? I know you overwork yourself way too hard …that’s why you’re an idiot.”

“We…” Akaashi stood up abruptly, looking at Bokuto. “We should leave.”

Bokuto looked puzzled, but nodded once, leading his guardian out the door after bidding his doctor farewell. Akaashi felt a bit reluctant to leave because he had a lot of questions for Oikawa as well as his senior’s human, but he gave one last look at the two on the couch before closing the door shut behind them.

 

* * *

 

Akaashi felt the rest of that afternoon pass by in a blur. He didn’t even realize he was purchasing ice cream with Bokuto until he felt something cold and sticky drip down his fingers. He stared at the sweet treat for a moment in confusion before looking up at his human who stopped talking about something or another midsentence.

“You okay, Akaashi?”

“I’m…” the guardian shifted his grip on the ice cream cone. “I’m fine.”

Bokuto looked unconvinced. He glanced at the cone in Akaashi’s hands. “Are… you going to eat that?”

Akaashi gave the treat a blank stare. “I’m not sure if it is even possible for me to eat.”

“Won’t hurt to try?” Bokuto responded cheerfully.

Akaashi took one look at the half-melted cone and after a moment of contemplative silence, he shook his head, handing the treat to his human. “No, you should have it. You’re alive after all.”

Bokuto’s smile shrank slightly. “…you’re alive too.”

_ ‘Am I?’  _ the guardian’s thoughts rang out.

Akaashi bit back the words on his tongue and looked towards the setting sun. He felt a little too big for the bench they sat on, a little too alien to be here with this man. He felt lost, confused, and a bit uncertain.

Oikawa had been reunited with the human he thought he had lost. And, from the looks of it, the two seemed rather… intimate. Akaashi wasn’t sure what to make of all of that. Was it appropriate for a guardian to become so close to a living being like that? What was he supposed to think about how closely the two had touched… how closely they had felt? Oikawa and his human’s connection seemed very natural to him, but he wondered if it was something forbidden or taboo because he couldn’t help but feel as if something was… off.

“Akaashi?”

The guardian blinked and closed his eyes, heaving a heavy sigh. He had too much to think about. “I… think I’ll need to go back today.”

“O-oh,” Bokuto mouthed.

Akaashi could see that Bokuto had an ice cream cone in his hand as well. The two seemed to be different flavors, the one in Akaashi’s hand pink and the one in Bokuto’s brown. Strawberry and chocolate. Akaashi felt a soft smile on his lips.

_ Cute. _

The guardian shook his head at the thought and stood up, grabbing the yellow folder from the depths of his robes. “Well… goodbye.”

Bokuto nodded, scooting forward in his seat, a look of longing settling in his eyes. “Could you come again?”

Akaashi stopped in the middle of shaking the folder. He looked down at his feet as he watched his surroundings disintegrate into nothingness.

“I don’t know.”

 

* * *

 

“Where have you been, Akaashi-san?”

Akaashi blinked as he exited the blinding light to stand in the office once more, only to find Kenma sitting at a chair waiting for him.

“I was out with my human,” Akaashi responded plainly as Kenma gave him a concerned look.

“You were gone for much longer than that.”

“What…?”

Kenma looked over at the desk where several folders were splayed out randomly across the top. Akaashi followed his gaze and met the man’s eyes once more.

“Time here is free-flowing, but it follows a continuum more or less,” Kenma explained. “We can skip years, but there’s a limit to how many years we can go.”

Akaashi nodded slowly, walking across the room to place Bokuto’s folder on the shelf.

“We can’t exceed a human lifespan. Basically, we can’t skip a hundred years or anything close to that. When our human passes or if we’re assigned a new human, we stay within the same hundred years that the rest of the guardians’ humans are around. Essentially, I could be taking care of an 80-year-old man and you could be taking care of a 10-year-old girl, but the two humans would still be living in the same time frame. And when my human dies, I’ll be assigned a human that is living in the same time frame as your human.”

Akaashi looked down at the files on the office desk to find his name written on several of the folders.

“Are… are these…?”

Kenma gave an exasperated sigh. “If a guardian is walking around in the whiteness, we can’t exactly pinpoint their location. Tanaka has grown quite fond of you, to be honest. And Tsukishima was worried as well.”

Akaashi blinked at the folders, feeling something soft bubble in his soul.

“Did something happen?” Kenma asked, pulling up his knees to his chest. “Usually, if you’re wandering around in the light for that long, you were probably trying to head to someplace quiet to think rather than come directly back here.”

“…yeah,” Akaashi admitted, making a chair pop up next to Kenma’s and sitting down in it. “Oikawa found his human and I had a lot of questions.”

Kenma stared at Akaashi in surprise. “Oh, I see. We actually sent out Tanaka to find Oikawa, but since everyone was less worried about him, we mostly searched for you instead.”

“I see,” Akaashi said, looking down at his hands. “…thank you.”

Kenma shook his head and looked towards the office desk. “It’s not a big deal.”

They sat in silence for a while longer. Akaashi was glad that Kenma didn’t pry any further into his matters because he himself was still unsure what he wanted to do. He wondered how long Oikawa and his human had known each other and if the two had talked about their relationship in detail. He questioned whether or not guardians were even allowed to become close to their humans and if it was acceptable… would Oikawa had any advice? Akaashi knew he wanted to ask his senior a million things beyond these questions as well once the man got back from wherever he was.

There was a flash of bright light and the two watched as Tanaka stumbled out of the doorway, a folder in his hand. Akaashi stood up from the chair, eager to greet Oikawa, but stopped in his tracks in seeing the panicked look in Tanaka’s eyes.

“Oikawa… his name… I… I can’t find him!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i said this is new content but this draft had been sitting on my comp for months before finally adding the last couple paragraphs or so recently XD //COUGHS
> 
> ANYWHO! thank you for reading!!  
> special shoutout to **namjokes** on wattpad who actually helped me to continue this fic when I was losing motivation XD bless you  <3 ofc as always shoutout to my lovely beta reader who gets mad at me cause of all my angst puwahahaha~


	6. Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Akaashi sifted through the rest of the papers on the desk, coming upon a scrawled list of some sort. Upon closer inspection, he realized it was Oikawa’s notes._
> 
> _There seemed to be notes regarding not only each of the individual guardians, but information about their humans as well. On the top of the page, he saw a large note labeled: #1—Make direct contact._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys it's been a while ^^ my health has been all over the place but im def not giving up on my chapter fics! this one will be the first to be completed and then I will go back to finish the others! thanks for everyone who has been patient so far! 2018 will be a better year. at least, that's my hope <3
> 
> have a long chapter! lots happen XD

“Stop, don’t take him!”

“Who the fuck are you?!”

Iwaizumi watched as a kid came barreling through the bushes to grab at his arm, his face set in intense concentration. The man who was holding onto Iwaizumi’s arm recoiled a little at the boy’s sudden appearance.

“Fuck off, kid, or else you’ll get hurt too!”

The kid side-stepped, dodging the man’s lunge towards him and heading towards where Iwaizumi was tied up on the floor, his small, battered body a few feet away from the black vehicle. The three of them were outside in a secluded area, a few trees swaying with the wind and the sun beating down a little too cheerily for the situation.

“Iwa-chan,” the child panted, trying to free Iwaizumi from the restraints. “Does it hurt, Iwa-chan? I’ll save you, Iwa-chan!”

Iwaizumi’s head felt fuzzy. He wasn’t even sure who this kid was nor why he was yelling so loudly. Every sound rang like a bell through his ears. He groaned, feeling a numbness around his arms where the ropes held his limbs together. The kid helped him stand to his feet, yet, he swayed dangerously on the pavement. Blearily, he gazed at his savior and blinked in confusion.

“…who?”

“It’s me, Iwa-chan! It’s—”

At that moment, the man grabbed at the kid from behind and the boy shrieked, sending alarms blaring through Iwaizumi’s head. Too loud. It was too loud. Whatever they were doing, it was too loud.

Be quiet. Be _quiet_. Just, be quiet… it hurts.

Iwaizumi squeezed his eyes shut and when he opened them again, saw the man crouched on the floor, his hands over his stomach, doubled over in pain. The boy stood shaking between Iwaizumi and the assailant, holding something sharp in his hands.

“You little shit—!”

“Run, Iwa-chan! I’ll stop him! I’ll—”

Iwaizumi didn’t hear anything else. He felt his eyes flutter close and his knees buckle underneath him. The last thing he registered before blacking out was a loud crunch as something in front of him crumpled to the floor like a leaf.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

Akaashi felt his mouth go dry.

“What do you mean you can’t find Oikawa?”

Tanaka shook the folder in his hands, looking frantically at Kenma and Akaashi. “Exactly what I said??? I was walking for a really long time, but then I noticed there was something wrong with the folder and…”

Tanaka pointed at the indicator on the file where half a name was scribbled. “What… what was the king’s first name??”

Both guardians stared at the folder dumbfoundedly before looking at each other in equal confusion. Oikawa’s first name…?

“Wasn’t it…” Akaashi began, but stopped, feeling his mind come up blank. “It started with a K…?”

Kenma gave Akaashi a strange look. “I thought it started with S…”

“C for me…” Tanaka mouthed.

The three of them stood there in silence, the light from the doorway a little too blinding for each of their eyes.

“Guys…” Tanaka stammered. “What… what do we do?”

Akaashi wound his hands together and Kenma curled up a little tighter in his seat. Tanaka stared at the two of them with slight panic in his eyes.

“F…first, we should call Tsukishima,” Akaashi started, looking down to pick at his fingers and refusing to meet eyes with the other guardians. “He should know about Oikawa too.”

“G-got it! I’ll go get him!” Tanaka exclaimed, clutching the folder tightly in his hands before dashing out of the illuminated entrance once more.

Kenma and Akaashi sat there in silence after he disappeared. It wasn’t the kind of comfortable silence that the two was used to, but something significantly more… unsettling. Akaashi picked at his fingernail a little too roughly.

As soon as he had left, Tanaka was back, a frowning Tsukishima in tow.

“Oikawa is gone??”

Everyone nodded, and Tsukishima sighed, furrowing his brows and running a hand through his hair. “It… the name started with a T, right?”

It was as if a lightbulb went off in the rest of their heads. Tanaka frantically nodded and Akaashi and Kenma looked at each other with recognition in their eyes. ‘T’ did sound very familiar. Oikawa T.

“If…” Akaashi began, looking at the others seriously. “If we just rifle through common names that start with T, maybe we’ll get somewhere.”

The rest of the guardians nodded, some a little more surely than others. Akaashi picked at his fingers behind his back, suppressing the idea that they wouldn’t be able to find anything.

 

 

 

 

 

“Tadashi?”

Akaashi scrawled the name onto the file indicator after ‘Oikawa’ and watched in anticipation for a few moments before it faded away. He clicked his tongue.

“What about Takeda?”

Once more, he wrote the suggestion down only to find it disappear as the others did.

“Tendou?”

Gone without a trace.

“Terushima?”

Nothing.

“Takeru?”

Akaashi wrote it down and as he expected, found it slowly melt off the surface of the folder. He sighed, placing the pen down and leaning back in the office chair that was once Oikawa’s.

“I don’t think we’ll be able to find him again,” Kenma said softly from his chair.

“Guys…” Tanaka groaned, arms splayed across the table from his position on the floor. “What do we do now…?”

“We’ll just have to follow the assignments we were given, right?” Tsukishima stated matter-of-factly from his position against the wall. “That’s… all we can do, right?”

Everyone seemed to agree. There wasn’t a point sitting there for who knows how long worrying about someone who may have disappeared off the face of the earth. For all they know, the king was happy where he was, away from the rest of them, freed from the shackles of being a guardian.

“What do we do when we need a replacement though?” Tanaka voiced, concern ringing throughout the room.

“Just… pick a folder off the shelf?” Kenma suggested.

“Any folder?”

“Isn’t that what Oikawa did?”

“I think he had a more complicated system than that” Akaashi mumbled, looking up at the shelves in the room that now seemed to reach skybound heights.

“Either way,” Tsukishima cleared his throat, glancing at the rest of the guardians in the room. “There should be a temporary leader for this.”

Everyone seemed to nod in agreement and all eyes turned to the person they all believed would fit the role best. Akaashi blinked in response to all the stares.

“Me? No, wait, I’m the newest here. If anything, Tsukishima or Kenma should take over!”

Kenma shook his head, curling into himself. “Too much work.”

Akaashi turned with pleading eyes to Tsukishima. The blonde shrugged, looking away. “Too much effort.”

As a final resort, Akaashi looked towards Tanaka who immediately recoiled, waving his hands frantically. “What?! No, are you crazy? I’m not the leader type.”

Akaashi ran a hand through his hair, suppressing a long sigh. “Really? I’m the only one?”

Kenma smiled a little apologetically. “We’ll help when we can.”

Tanaka nodded, giving Akaashi a brisk thumbs up and Tsukishima looked ready to leave the room.

“It will make it easier if we don’t switch out humans,” Akaashi began, swallowing thickly. “Just… don’t kill anyone.”

Everyone agreed, getting ready to set off to do their own things. Akaashi closed his eyes, bringing his fingers together tightly before concluding their meeting with one last remark.

“…unless you absolutely need to.”

 

 

 

 

 

“It’s about time you showed up.”

Tsukishima blinked. He wasn’t expecting to be greeted by Kuroo the moment he stepped out of the whiteness. And yet, there he was, standing there in the college classroom, his arms folded over his chest.

It’s not like it wasn’t already crazy enough with Oikawa’s disappearance and suddenly, his human could see him as well? This was getting to be too much of a hassle.

“I’m sorry, I think you have the wrong person,” Tsukishima started, ready at a moment’s notice to shake the contents of his folder and make his escape. “I’m afraid we’ve never met.”

“That’s true, but you’re my guardian, aren’t you?”

Tsukishima froze, taken aback by the straightforward accusation. He looked straight at Kuroo and hoped that the man didn’t see the panic in his eyes. “I… don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You sure?” Kuroo asked, moving an arm to scratch at his head. “Pretty sure Bokuto said my guardian was a tall, blonde guy.”

Tsukishima silently cursed Akaashi’s human with all his might before sighing, feeling a little too ragged and worn for this entire conversation.

“Yes, yes I am.”

“Really?” Kuroo’s eyes widened in surprise. “I totally thought he was pranking me or something and yet, once I looked closer, there you were, just standing right next to me. I must have been blind or something!”

“Not blind,” Tsukishima murmured. “Just sane.”

Kuroo laughed, leaning back on one of the tables. “I suppose. I know Bokuto had a hard time when he first saw his guardian.”

The room went silent after that, Kuroo giving Tsukishima a thorough look up and down while Tsukishima stared at anywhere but his human. The guardian felt his fingers intertwine in his nervousness.

“Well, if that’s all, then I’ll be on my way—”

“Hey, wait,” Kuroo interjected, holding out a hand as if to keep Tsukishima rooted to the spot. “I didn’t even get your name, Blondie.”

Tsukishima flinched at the sudden nickname. “Don’t call me that.”

“Then, your name?”

“…Tsukishima.”

“Tsukki, then,” Kuroo hummed. “Tell me more about being a guardian.”

“Shouldn’t you have heard the details from Bokuto-san?”

“Mm, ‘-san,’ huh?”

Tsukishima sighed. “I’m pretty sure the two of you are older than me—since the age of my death at least.”

Kuroo stopped, going silent and seating himself more comfortably on the table he was leaning against. “…was it painful?”

“What?”

“Was dying painful?” Kuroo repeated.

 “It’s… just a part of life.”

“What, dying?”

“Yeah.”

Kuroo laughed aloud at this, his grin reaching his ears. “You’re saying that _death_ is a part of _life_?”

Tsukishima frowned, a bit frustrated that his human was seemingly poking fun at him. “Yes, isn’t that a given?”

“You make a valid argument,” Kuroo chuckled, inviting Tsukishima to sit down on one of the chairs. Kei didn’t budge an inch at the invitation. “I guess it’s easy to talk about life and death as someone who controls both.”

Tsukishima paused. “You don’t think it’s contradictory?”

“No?” Kuroo stared back matter-of-factly. “Isn’t it obvious that mortals are conscious of their mortality? Life and death are a part of the same coin.”

“You’re smarter than I gave you credit for, Kuroo-san.”

“Wow, what, that’s rude,” Kuroo teased, a smirk on his lips. “How dumb did you think I was?”

“Well, you hang out with Bokuto-san a lot…”

“Ah… Bokuto causes a lot of trouble, but he’s smart in his own way, I’d like to believe.”

“Huh,” Tsukishima voiced, with a hint of doubt in his voice.

The two of them went silent once more and Tsukishima felt he needed a compelling reason to leave. It was a lot easier to talk to his human than he originally thought, but he felt he was walking down a dangerous path. Although, maybe he should have talked with his previous humans instead of just erasing them from—

“So, Kuroo-san,” Tsukishima began, shaking himself out of his own thoughts. “Do you really have nothing better to do than loiter around an empty classroom in search of fantastical, fairy tales such as guardian angels?”

“Excuse me, Tsukki,” Kuroo retorted with just as much sass. “For your information, that ‘fantastical fairy tale’ turned out to be true—I mean, look who’s standing right in front of me now.”

“Or you could just be talking to yourself like a crazy person.”

“Let’s hope not,” Kuroo smiled, getting up and starting to head towards the door. “Well, I’ll be off then to make my guardian proud—you know, be a productive member of society and all. Let me know the next time you’re around, okay, Tsukki? I want to know more about you.”

“I don’t know why you both—” Tsukki started, but was cut off as the door swung closed behind the bedhead. He sighed, running his fingers down the folder before shaking its contents in order to head back home.

It was a strange thing getting to talk with someone other than the guardians. He hadn’t had actual “human” contact in a long time and the last time he did, it hadn’t been a very pleasant one. There weren’t many negative feelings with the memories surrounding his life before death, but frankly, Tsukishima didn’t feel much in the way of anything while he was alive.

Maybe that’s why this feeling in the depths of his soul felt strange. It was prickly, lukewarm, and uncertain. Tsukishima wondered if it was just because he wasn’t sure what he was doing as a guardian or if this was the first step to his disappearance. Either way, he didn’t like it. He brushed it off as quickly as it came, cursing the fact that he couldn’t kill Kuroo as he did his previous humans. Despite everything else about the job that he found manageable, he hated the silence in the lounge and the office more than anything. He would keep the human if only to get some relief from the nothingness.

In thinking about it, Kuroo’s dreams weren’t overly bothersome. They mostly involved things with school or work—very mundane and repetitive. Sometimes, they would be a bit more exciting—a date with someone he liked or a sports game with his friends. Those, Tsukishima enjoyed. Actually, if he was being completely honest, he liked all the dreams Kuroo had but, mostly because he himself hadn’t…

Tsukishima shook his head. He was thinking too much and consequently, he was probably taking too long to get back home. His previous life wasn’t like this. He didn’t have to mull over too much; he only had to calculate exactly what he needed and finish it in order to continue living. Being a guardian was so much easier than that lifestyle so what made this job any more difficult?

 

 

 

 

 

Akaashi didn’t think the office could get even quieter and yet, there he was, sitting all alone in the chair as the silence suffocated him.

He didn’t know where to begin. He didn’t even know what Oikawa-san did while he sat here alone for hours, weeks, months, years… Akaashi looked up at the bookshelves and sighed, feeling something weigh heavily on his shoulders. No wonder the king looked so tired all the time.

To start, Akaashi set about to organizing the files on the desk. He moved files he didn’t know anything about to the right and moved those he recognized to the left. He paused upon reaching the one with Oikawa’s name on it—or rather, the one with half his name on it.

Out of curiosity, Akaashi opened the folder and was surprised to see the king’s information was still intact excluding his first name. Akaashi saw Oikawa’s birthdate, his favorite color, his favorite food, and other information about him while he was alive. He read down further to see the man’s description:

 _Died: Age 23, in a coma_  
            Oikawa —.  Took a fatal blow to the head by a kidnapper when he was 6-years-old. This hit incapacitated him, sentencing him to spend the rest of his days unconscious in the hospital. Rushed out to save a friend, and ended up stabbing the man.  
            Crime: Unnecessary violence against another human being  
            Sentence: Guardian

_Number of humans that have been in their care: 1_

Akaashi stared incredulously at the ‘crime’ Oikawa had committed. Unnecessary violence? The boy had literally put his life on the line to save his friend and he was punished for it? This was some kind of injustice…

Akaashi couldn’t stop himself from sliding over to the cabinet with blank folders, writing each of the guardians’ names in turn. He needed to know what else they had done to land themselves here and if Oikawa was the only one being unfairly punished by some higher power. He knew this was an invasion of privacy, but given that the others had given him authority, he figured he had some right to know, right?

He quickly scrawled Tsukishima Kei on the first folder, watching the contents glow once in sync with the door before a single piece of paper appeared inside. Akaashi flipped it open and skipping the general information, scanned the material until he found the description.

 _Died: Age 16, slit neck_  
            Tsukishima Kei. Took a moderate cut to the neck as he was on his way to gather supplies. He bled out in silence in an alleyway in the middle of the night. The man who targeted him wanted revenge for an assassination.  
            Crime: Homicide  
            Sentence: Guardian

_Number of humans that have been in their care: 11_

Akaashi nearly choked. He knew Tsukishima didn’t have any qualms about killing other people, but he didn’t know that it was because of a past history in assassination. Although he didn’t know the details, Akaashi was sure it couldn’t have been pleasant for a teenager to live that kind of life.

Quickly, as if on a time constraint, Akaashi jot down the next name.

 _Died: Age 19, execution_  
            Kozume Kenma. Was arrested and prosecuted for theft. Stole food and water from nearby grocery stores and was caught in the act after several years of committing the offense. Store owners had him tried and executed for his actions.  
            Crime: Theft  
            Sentence: Guardian

_Number of humans that have been in their care: 5_

Akaashi was appalled at the disparity of crimes in these folders. For Tsukishima, he was being punished because he had killed someone, but Kenma was also being punished with the same sentence even though he merely stole food to get by. Akaashi didn’t really think it was fair for them to be penalized for things outside their control; he was sure that these teenagers did not have much of a choice doing the things they did to survive. In fact, Akaashi flipped the papers over as though there would be more detailed information on the other side. He wondered if Kenma was even from Japan. Maybe he lived someplace far where poverty and crimes lay rampant across the country. Regardless, it all seemed pretty unfair.

Akaashi rubbed his temples in frustration. Were his crimes of a similar caliber? He wondered what kind of offense he had committed in order to be forced to become a guardian for the rest of time. He shook his head, writing out Tanaka’s name on a new folder and hoping that it made some logical sense at least in comparison to the others.

 _Died: Age 20, beaten to death_  
            Tanaka Ryuunosuke. Beaten to death by a couple of college students after he went and attacked them for hurting someone he cared about. He infiltrated the gang hideout on the outskirts of town and started hitting the leader for raping his older sister. His body was left to rot in the dumpsters outside.  
            Crime: Unnecessary violence against another human being  
            Sentence: Guardian

_Number of humans that have been in their care: 5_

Frowning and feeling a twinge in his soul, Akaashi moved on to his own folder. He would have to give his condolences to Tanaka-san later. Given the man’s carefree nature, Akaashi had assumed that his crime would be something of a similar caliber—nothing serious. And yet, Akaashi felt some kind of guilt. He wasn’t sure if it was because he felt sorry for the man, but he definitely felt like his previous demeanor towards him was… unbecoming.

With the final folder, Akaashi found himself bracing though he knew that he wouldn’t find anything of use.

_Died: Age 22, -- ----- -- --- ----  
            Akaashi Keiji. ---- -- - -------- ---- -- ----- ----------…_

Akaashi didn’t even bother trying to decipher the rest because it was blurred, muddled up and smudged against the paper. In desperation, he tried to rub the writing so that it would clear, but it stayed the same. Sighing, he moved down to read his crime and sentence.

_Crime: ------  
            Sentence: Guardian_

Akaashi groaned, laying his head into his hands. He was nowhere closer to knowing why he was sent here than the first day he arrived. At least he knew why the four of them were there—to atone for their crimes on an illogical justice system. He breathed heavily. Knowing that was a start.

After setting their folders aside, Akaashi sifted through the rest of the papers on the desk, coming upon a scrawled list of some sort. Upon closer inspection, he realized it was Oikawa’s notes. There seemed to be notes regarding not only each of the individual guardians, but information about their humans as well. On the top of the page, he saw a large note labeled: #1— _Make direct contact._

Akaashi figured that these papers would help him solve a little more of the mystery surrounding their existence, but of the meaning behind their purpose as well. He gathered the notes and set about reading them in hopes that the king had figured out more than he had.

 

 

 

 

 

Kenma wasn’t sure how he got here.

Scratch that, he knew exactly how he got here; he was just bewildered by the fact that his human had managed to knock him out cold. He didn’t even know guardians could pass out until he found himself blinking blearily at the gymnasium ceiling, fighting a fuzziness in his head.

“Ah, you’re awake!”

Kenma jolted upright at this exclamation, knocking heads with something and recoiling with a whimper. He held his head in his hands, also wondering if guardians could get bruises given they didn’t have normal body functions.

“Hinata, boke!”

“Aghhh, shut up Kageyama! H-hey, are you okay?”

Kenma fought back the wetness in his eyes and looked up to see his human staring down at him with concern. The two locked eyes, brown to amber. Kenma blinked back, feeling heat rise in his ears.

_Run._

The word blared alarms through his head. And yet, Kenma sat frozen, unable to move an inch, rooted to the floor.

“He’s probably some kind of spy from another school,” the tall, intimidating guy behind Hinata spoke, wiping sweat off his chin.

“Really?” Hinata asked before turning back to Kenma. “Hey, what school are you from?”

“U-uh,” Kenma mouthed.

Hinata frowned, turning back to his friend. “Kageyama, you’re scaring him.”

“Hah?!”

“Go practice over there,” Hinata shooed his teammate away. Kageyama looked irritated, but complied, shuffling over to the other side of the gym with a volleyball in hand. Kenma felt his nerves quell slightly.

“Hey, what’s that?” Hinata pointed at something on the ground next to Kenma.

Kenma followed his human’s finger to find the folder labeled ‘Hinata Shouyou’ next to him, its contents splayed out close to the file. Kozume jumped, moving forward to collect the papers and shove them back in before Hinata could get a closer look, but a moment too late.

“Wait, that’s me! You really are gathering intel!”

“Ah, no, that’s—”

The moment his human picked up the piece of paper, it vanished into thin air. The two of them stared at Hinata’s hands, at a loss for words.

“Where did it—”

Out of the corner of his eye, Kenma saw that the folder had gained a new sheet, and his shoulders slumped in relief. “It went back.”

“Back?”

“Oi, Hinata, are you done yet?! We have to practice your spikes!”

“Ah, yeah, I’m coming!” Hinata exclaimed, leaping up and readying to run off towards the court. “Sorry for hitting you—feel free to join our practice sometime! Even if you’re from another school, it’d be nice to have a blocker!”

With that, his human sprang away, a ball of boundless energy to his partner who was eagerly anticipating his arrival. The two exchanged a few words regarding Kenma’s arrival—the taller of the two players debating letting the coaches know while Hinata pouted, asking what the big deal was. Kenma didn’t want to stick around too long. Quickly gathering the rest of the papers, he gathered them into the confines of the folder before giving it a brisk shake. He watched as his surroundings dissolved around him and once he felt safe in the whiteness, he heaved a heavy sigh.

His human saw him. Kenma knew that that was only the start of other problems to come. He wanted to get to the lounge as quickly as possible and rest, but he knew that his fatigue was one that couldn’t be resolved by laying down and trying to sleep it away.

He sighed once more, wanting nothing more than to sit down where he was and do nothing for the rest of time.

_What a pain._

 

 

 

 

 

Akaashi walked into the lounge to see the rest of the guardians there, doing their own respective things—Kenma on his video game, Tsukishima listening to music, and Tanaka reading his comic books. Akaashi stood in the doorway with a bundle of papers in hand, a little unsure of what to do to grab everyone’s attention.

On the couch, Tanaka gave Akaashi a side look before dropping his books and sitting up straight. “Akaashi, do you need something?”

“Ah, yes,” Akaashi stammered, watching as Kenma turned to look at him too and Tsukishima seemed to be listening from behind his headphones. “I need to talk with you all.”

Fighting the urge to return to the office and barricade himself under the desk, Akaashi cleared his throat, gesturing to the documents he held. Everyone made an effort to gather a bit more closely to him and listen attentively to what he had to say.

“I went through Oikawa’s notes… and I also looked into each of your backgrounds.”

“What?”

Tsukishima took off his headphones, his eyes slanted.

“I’m… I apologize for doing so without your permission, but I thought it would help me figure out more. I know my apology can’t bring bac—”

“No, not that,” Tsukishima said, moving over closer to join the others. “What did his notes say?”

Akaashi blinked. “I… you’re not upset that I went through your file?”

“I mean…” Tsukishima looked at the other two guardians, avoiding eye contact with Akaashi. “Of course, I’m annoyed, but you’re sort of our leader now so you should know the most, right?”

Kenma and Tanaka seemed to agree, the former humming while the latter shook his head up and down vigorously.

“What we want to know is everything the king has been writing,” Tsukishima continued. “It was probably after the loss of his human that he became way too secretive and refused to share anything with us. But, we’re all doing the same job so we deserve to know.”

Relieved, Akaashi nodded. “I agree. Looking through all the notes Oikawa-san had made so far…”

 Akaashi dug through the papers in his arms and pulled out a single sheet of paper that had Oikawa’s handwriting scrawled over its surface. “Contact. Direct contact is key.”

“Contact?” Tanaka voiced.

“Yes, such as talking with your human.”

“Does making eye contact count?”

Akaashi frowned, shuffling through the notes. “I don’t think so—though it is a good start in establishing direct contact with your human.”

“I… made eye contact with my human once,” Tanaka murmured. “Does that mean it’ll be easier for me to talk with him?”

“I’m not sure, sorry.”

“I already made contact with my human… he gave me a concussion.”

Everyone turned to look at Kenma with wide eyes. The guardian shrugged.

“On my most recent outing, he hit me in the head with a volleyball when I was out of bounds.”

“Wow, he must have been a grade A idiot to knock you out like that,” Tsukishima smirked as Tanaka suppressed a laugh. Akaashi smiled at the memory of the short, excitable redhead he saw with Kenma the last time. ‘Interesting,’ Kenma had called him.

“What about you Tsukishima?” Akaashi asked, remembering the messy bedhead of a human Tsukishima had.

Tsukishima scowled slightly. “He’s alright.”

“No, I mean, have you made contact with him yet?”

Furrowing his brows and looking away, Tsukishima put his hands behind his back. “…yes.”

“Great, then we’ve all made contact with our humans, correct?”

“Uh, actually,” Tanaka spoke up, scratching his head bashfully. “The only time I made contact with him was that one time we saw each other and I freaked out.”

“…and left me behind.”

Tanaka winced. “And left you behind.”

Akaashi gave a small snort, remembering the exact moment quite vividly. “That’s alright. Maybe the eye contact will make it easier for you to actually speak with him.”

“R-right…” Tanaka slumped, looking disheartened. “Are you sure we need to make contact with our humans though? Can’t we make contact with… someone else?”

Akaashi narrowed his eyes. “If you’re thinking about that girl, then forget it. Besides, nobody other than your assigned human can see you, remember? That means that you can’t interact with anyone else either… it’s just not possible.”

“Alright, alright…” Tanaka droned, giving the impression that it was _not_ alright. Still, he complied and didn’t push the issue any further.

“…hey, wait,” Kenma started, looking slightly confused. “My human’s friend could see me.”

Akaashi blinked. “What—really?”

“I think so. He thought I was a spy from another volleyball team.”

“I…” Akaashi scratched his head, flipping through some of the papers in vain. “I’m not sure about that… that’s the first I’ve heard of that—even in Oikawa’s deeper notes.”

“Wouldn’t that mean Kenma-san has two humans to look after?” Tsukishima inputted.

Kenma made a face. “Please, no.”

“I don’t think that’s the case so please rest assured, Kenma,” Akaashi stated, matter-of-factly. “Once a guardian is assigned a human, they cannot be given another one or else both folders end up disappearing. In order to be assigned a new human, they must first reshelf the file onto the bookcase and choose a different one.”

“Then, why is Kenma-san able to communicate with two humans?” Tsukishima pressed, frustration clear on his face.

“I don’t know.”

“To be fair, I didn’t really talk with him,” Kenma added quietly. “Does that help?”

Akaashi shook his head, bewilderment clear on his face.

The four of them went silent. Even though they had learned the first step, it still rose more questions in the end. What in the world was up with Kenma’s human? Is it possible to speak with more than one human? Akaashi shook his head, clearing his throat.

“A-anyways, the first step is to make contact with your human. Then, you must become closer to them.”

“Close to them?” Tsukishima asked, incredulously. “In what sense?”

“It…” Akaashi’s memories flashed back to Oikawa and Iwaizumi on the couch, embracing in a way too close to be platonic. “It doesn’t specify.”

Tsukishima narrowed his eyes. “You have an idea, though, yes?”

Akaashi shuffled his feet. “I do have an idea. But, I’m not sure if Oikawa-san’s case is… a prime example to take into account. Plus, there’s also the issue of how that kind of thing would work in Kenma’s case… given his human’s friend can surprisingly see him as well, but is not subject to our documentation.”

“Either way,” Akaashi started up more confidently, looking around at all of them. “Just work on those two things for now. The details afterwards were fuzzy based on Oikawa-san’s notes, but doing everything should lead to our future… disappearance.”

An eerie silence swept through the lounge. The four of them were still unsure what to make of disappearances, but if there was _some_ kind of progress, then…

“Alright then,” Tanaka groaned, getting up from his seat and stretching. “I guess I’ll be off to get closer to my little film nerd.”

Kenma nodded in response to this, curling into himself and summoning his console into his hands. Akaashi gave him a look; Kenma returned it with a shrug.

“I’m not sure what the deal is with my human and I’m not particularly keen on getting knocked out again so I’ll stay put for now.”

Akaashi smiled. “Alright.”

Addressing the others, he raised his voice a little louder. “Please document as you have been doing!”

Tsukishima sighed, watching Tanaka disappear through the doorway into the whiteness. Intending to follow after, he sent his headphones away, making the machine disappear with a pop. Akaashi heard Tsukishima mumble something along the lines of ‘a pain’ before the taller man left the room for the office as well.

Heaving a sigh, Akaashi lay down on the couch Tanaka was in and closed his eyes for a brief moment.

“I’m worried about Tsukishima.”

Kenma looked up briefly from his game. “Why?”

“He hasn’t… he hasn’t had genuine human contact in the longest time. Actually, the most human interactions he’s ever had was probably with us.”

“What makes you say that?”

“His background. It…” Akaashi searched for the right words to say, but found none. “It’s sad. I just hope his human is a nice guy. He seemed kind of sleazy when I first saw him.”

Kenma frowned at something on his screen, tapping the controls a bit more vigorously. “I think Tsukishima has had a bad track record with his previous humans.”

“Obviously,” Akaashi murmured, recalling the number of humans that were previously in Tsukishima’s care.

“You should sleep,” Kenma’s voice sounded from far away.

“Mm,” Akaashi responded.

“Must be tiring.”

“Yeah.”

“…and thanks for finding things out for…”

Akaashi didn’t hear any more as he felt his consciousness slowly drift away. For some reason, he felt particularly exhausted. Was this how Oikawa felt? Was this the price of knowing the truth? And yet, he would have to continue down this road if he wanted to make any progress—whether good or bad.

Yawning, Akaashi turned over. He wondered what Bokuto was doing. He wondered if his human missed him or if he even felt the guardian’s absence while Akaashi was gone. He wondered if it would be alright to go see him again—if it would be okay to see him the same way Oikawa saw his human. He wondered if that was a dangerous thought to have.

Regardless, Akaashi knew that he had to do _something_ or else everything would stay the same. Even if that meant he would be more tired as a result, he wanted to move things into action. He had the nagging feeling that his human counterpart wanted something similar. What exactly, he didn’t know, but at the very least, going forward with this motion was a start.

With this resolve in mind, Akaashi let himself enter the realm of Bokuto’s dreams.

 

 

 

 

 

Tsukishima figured that it was probably a good thing that his human chose to speak with him. At least, with this new information, he knew he was on the right track. He would just have to talk with Kuroo and get closer to him somehow…

Bringing his fingers together, Tsukishima bit his bottom lip anxiously. If anything, he now knew what to do. If anything went wrong or things got uncomfortable, he could just kill Kuroo and put the blame on his past temperament as an assassin. Akaashi would probably just give him a sad smile and assign Tsukishima a new human right away. Yes, he had nothing to worry about. Nothing at all.

And yet, he wondered why he was feeling so nervous.

Tsukishima bent his folder back and watched it spring forward to add another page. He sighed, making sure his suit was on properly before heading out the entrance to the brightness ahead. He knew it wasn’t opportune at all, tucking in his clothes like this, but he couldn’t help the habit he formed a long time ago. Tsukishima sighed. It wasn’t hindering him so who cared, really?

It wasn’t long until he noticed his surroundings materialize around him. He blinked as sunlight hit his eyes and raised his arms to shield his vision.

In the distance, he spotted two men sitting at a park bench, one hunched over sadly while the other seemed to be attempting to brighten the mood. Tsukishima started making his way slowly over to their side, immediately noting the physical features of Kuroo and Bokuto.

“Bokuto, don’t sulk, I’m sure he’s just busy.”

“I don’t know, I thought that if I just wished he were here, he’d be here, you know?”

“Dude, if that were true, I would’ve seen my guardian a hundred times by now. Besides, isn’t it good that we’re not seeing them much? That must mean they have less reasons to ‘guard’ us.”

“Mm.”

“Loitering around this park won’t help, you know,” Kuroo insisted, brows furrowing.

“How do you know? Maybe it makes it easier for him to find me or something.”

“That’s not true!” Kuroo continued, moving his hands as he spoke as if the action would further support his argument. “My guardian told me that it’s actually harder to find us if we’re in the same place we were before!”

Tsukishima stifled a laugh. “Kuroo-san, you shouldn’t lie.”

Kuroo jumped up in surprise, looking up at Tsukishima with wide eyes. His cheeks turned a deep red.

“Ah, Tsukki.”

Standing confidently in front of his human, Tsukishima smirked. Even if he did feel uncertain and scared about this whole ordeal, he definitely didn’t want to show it in Kuroo’s face. “What was that about me telling you something?”

Blushing an even deeper shade of red, Kuroo rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Ahah… caught red-handed.”

He pouted, hunching over so that his physique resembled that of a cat. Tsukishima thought it was strangely endearing. “I just wanted to make Bo feel better, you can’t blame me, Tsukki. In fact, it’s your fault for not telling me anything about you guardians.”

Tsukishima scoffed, a hand immediately resting on his hip. “How is that _my_ fault? I didn’t _want_ to talk with you—you’re the one who made first contact with me.”

Kuroo mock rolled his eyes, laughter in his expression. Bokuto blinked, sitting up straighter. “Is… is your guardian here, Kuroo?”

“Ah, yeah, he’s a cheeky little shit,” Kuroo crooned, a teasing smile on his lips as he gazed up at Tsukishima’s figure. Kei felt himself bristle with irritation.

“I could say the same about you.”

Bokuto stared, wide-eyed. “What’s he saying?”

“Nothing important,” Kuroo hummed, giving Kei a side eye. Tsukishima could feel his blood—or whatever guardians had running through their godforsaken excuse for a body—boiling. Would it be completely disrespectful to Akaashi if he decided to kill his human right here, right now? ‘Cause, damn, this snarky bastard was testing him.

Tsukishima huffed, taking a deep breath to compose himself. “Well, if I’m not doing anything of importance, then I guess I’ll be off.”

Kuroo started, nearly leaping out of his seat. “Wait, wait, what?”

Kei started to walk away, folder clutched tightly in his hands. Whatever this interacting thing was, it wasn’t working and he wasn’t going to waste any more time on it. The next time he saw Kuroo, he could just push the man off a cliff and be done with it. Something in his soul fought against the very thought, but Tsukishima brushed it off, shaking his head.

Maybe his next human would be a bit more manageable.

“Wow, you really screwed up, Mr. provocation master,” Bokuto taunted. Although he couldn’t see what was happening directly, he definitely caught the panicked look in Kuroo’s eyes--the same one he got whenever he said something that crossed one line too far.

“Wait, Tsukki,” Kuroo voiced again, running ahead to block off Tsukishima’s path. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hit a nerve. I was serious about wanting to get to know you more.”

“Right,” Tsukishima responded as he made his way around Kuroo, sarcasm dripping from his tone. “And I’m elated that you feel that way. Truly. Honestly. I’m flattered.”

“Ouch,” Kuroo winced, continuing to make an effort to stop Tsukishima from leaving. “Just give me one more chance! I don’t want to lose my guardian right after I found out about him.”

‘ _Oh, you’re not just going to lose me_ ,’ Tsukishima thought bitterly. ‘ _You’re going to lose your life, you inconsiderate overgrown m_ —”

Kuroo bowed, his hands clasped together tightly. “One more chance!”

Tsukishima hesitated, looking down at the unruly mess of black hair. To be completely honest, he wasn’t sure if he had ever been shown this level of respect in his life. Heck, had he ever been bowed to before… ever?

Kei coughed awkwardly, his hands holding onto the folder tightly behind his back. “I… I guess once more is fine.”

Kuroo perked up, a light in his eyes that seemed a little too pure-hearted to dwell on his roguish features. “It’s a date then!”

Tsukishima nearly choked. “A date?!”

In all his afterlife, Tsukishima had not expected to hear that word associated with him. Heck, even while he was alive, that word was only something of fantasies, trivialities the masses partook in in a futile effort to waste time and subject themselves to the shackles of capitalism.

“What do you mean by a _date_?”

Kuroo blinked, standing up straight. “Exactly as it sounds like. Dates are the best way for men to show off their charm, don’t you think?”

Stammering, Tsukishima narrowed his eyes, ignoring the heat rising to his cheeks and looking towards Bokuto who was staring at Kuroo with beady eyes. Tsukishima coughed, giving Kuroo a demeaning glare and responding in a way he hoped kept his composure.

“That is stupidest idea I’ve ever heard—and I thought _you_ were the smart one.”

“Hey,” Kuroo smirked, sending Bokuto a glance before looking back at Tsukishima. “According to you, I have to be plenty stupid to spend a minute with him at all, right?”

 

 

 

 

 

Ennoshita was a bit taken aback when a man appeared out of thin air and demanded they get closer. At least, he was pretty sure that this hooligan had magically showed up given that he was literally sitting in a locked bathroom stall, about to take a leak.

“Holy shit, I’m so sorry, fuck, this wasn’t a good time, I’ll just—”

The man didn’t get to continue as Ennoshita had grabbed the nearest item—in this case, a toilet brush—and smacked him over the head with it, simultaneously yelling at the top of his lungs.

“Get out?! Are you crazy?!”

“AHHH, I’M SORRY!”

“Director?” A man’s voice echoed through the bathroom stalls, stopping right outside the door. “Are you alright?!”

“No, there is a crazy person inside this stall with me,” Ennoshita called over Tanaka’s attempts to shush him. “Please have security carry Mr. Baldy out.”

“I’m telling you, nobody else can see m—”

“Right away! Please open the stall.”

After making sure he was properly dressed, Ennoshita reached over Tanaka and unlocked the door. The theater personnel peered into the stall, confusedly looking around.

“The… where’s the culprit?”

“Can’t you see him? He’s right here,” Ennoshita gestured to Tanaka who was giving a sheepish grin in the stranger’s direction.

“I… um…” the staff member scratched his head. “Is this a joke, Ennoshita-san?”

Ennoshita blinked. “What?”

“There’s no one there, director.”

“I’m…” Ennoshita frowned. “I’m pretty sure a cladly dressed man in a kimono is standing right next to me right now.”

“I-Is that the plot for your next screenplay?”

Ennoshita gaped, at a loss for words. The theater member awkwardly wished Ennoshita well in taking care of the rest of his business before shuffling away, leaving the restroom.

“How did you do that?” the director demanded, the moment the staff was out of earshot.

Tanaka held his hands up in defense. “I swear I didn’t do anything!”

“Hey, wait a minute…” Ennoshita squinted, giving Tanaka a thorough look up and down. “You’re… you’re that guy I bumped into that one time! I thought I was going crazy!”

Tanaka perked up, lowering his hands. “You remembered?”

“Yeah, of course I remembered—your little act had me on edge for the rest of that week! You’d better explain yourself right now, you... odd-fashioned stalker!”

“Hey, I’m not a stalker!” Tanaka retorted, huffily. “If there’s anyone I’d want to serve as a guardian for, it’d be that beauty in your production crew!”

“Beauty? Who—never mind that—don’t you dare lay a finger on any of our… wait, guardian?”

“Ah, it’s a long story…”

Ennoshita looked as if he wanted to say something, but shook his head, pushing Tanaka out of the stall with him. “I don’t know what’s going on, or why you’ve decided to make my life a living hell, but please leave. We have important things to get done.”

Tanaka stammered. “I know! I know all about those things! There’s that one part you’re struggling to write, right? And there’s this one scene the actors keep screwing up and another where you’re frustrated with that actor with the bleached spikey hair and—”

“Okay, please stop talking, you are not making it easier on yourself as a self-proclaimed innocent.”

When Tanaka made an effort to explain using some kind of mangled excuse for proper Japanese, Ennoshita sighed, rubbing his temples.

“Look, apparently you have a lot… and I mean a _lot_ of explaining to do,” the director concluded, resigning himself. “Why don’t we go grab a cup of coffee over it—your treat since you are the one who got a look at my—”

“Ahh!” Tanaka yelped, screwing his eyes shut and waving his hands out in front of him. “I swear I didn’t see anything!”

Ennoshita smirked, a rosy flush fading from his cheeks. Tanaka wondered if he had only imagined them. He thought it was kind of cute.

“Alright then,” Ennoshita said, running a hand through his hair. “Since you know everything about me—still your treat, Mr…?”

“Tanaka Ryuunosuke! And I… uh, I don’t have money though…”

“Are you serious?” Ennoshita stared intently at Tanaka’s kimono pockets. “Fine, next time, your treat. I’m not getting you anything.”

Tanaka grumbled, begrudgingly agreeing. Ennoshita laughed before directing Tanaka to where the bathroom exit was.

“I thought we were going to get coffee?”

“If you remember, you kind of stopped me in the middle of something so just wait outside.”

Tanaka flushed. “A-ah, right.”

Ennoshita rolled his eyes, a teasing smile light on his face. “Get moving, you shady-looking character.”

“I’m not—!” Tanaka started, but stopped upon seeing Ennoshita had already made his way back into the bathroom stall. He sighed, scratching his head and making his way outside. Was he doing this ‘getting closer’ shtick correctly? So far, it has felt like a complete disaster. He wanted to get closer to Ennoshita, but not… like that. Tanaka winced. Hopefully this meeting was not a precursor for more troubles ahead.

 

 

 

 

 

The coffee was spilling.

Akaashi watched as Bokuto added another cube of sugar to the overflowing cup. The man kept stirring, seemingly unaware of the fact the contents were dripping all over the place. The liquid trailed over the saucer, onto the table, flowing into the river of coffee beneath their feet.

Akaashi wasn’t sure why he hadn’t stopped his human from stirring. Bokuto’s erratic circular movements with the spoon seemed to be making the stream of coffee even worse—the waters soaking the two of them, the liquid flowing up to their waists.

And yet, Bokuto wasn’t aware of his surroundings. Instead, he merely stared straight ahead, mumbling something soft under his breath and periodically adding more condiments to the drink in front of him. The air was filled with a nervous tension that Akaashi couldn’t place.

“Bokuto-san?”

Bokuto twitched, his stirring slowing. His eyes seemed to focus on the mess that he had created in front of him.

“W-woah, what’s all this?”

At once, the river faded, leaving the two of them seated in a pleasant café booth of some sort, a quaint cup of coffee steaming in front of Bokuto.

“Akaashi?”

Akaashi nodded in response, giving Bokuto a small smile.

“Akaashi, are you there?”

“Yes, Bokuto-san, I am right in front of you.”

“Akaashi, you must be there, right?”

Bokuto didn’t seem to be able to see Akaashi, but strangely enough, was able to sense the guardian’s presence in the confines of the dream. Bokuto paused briefly, looking down solemnly at his cup of coffee. A quiet voice that Akaashi recognized as Bokuto’s rang out softly through the air.

‘ _It’s warm_.’

Akaashi blinked, unsure what to say or do.

“It’s warm,” Bokuto voiced aloud, taking a spoon to stir the contents of his drink. “Not too hot to burn you, or too cold to freeze you… it’s just right.”

He took a sip, wincing at the bitterness. Bokuto laughed, the sound echoing through the emptiness.

“It’s just like him.”

Akaashi fidgeted in his seat. Was this warmth in his chest normal?

Bokuto sighed, moving the coffee aside to lay his head on the table. “Akaashi…”

‘ _Come home._ ’

A breath caught in Akaashi’s throat and something ached deep within. There was something about seeing the man vulnerable that moved Akaashi. He had seen the boy grow up whether directly or indirectly. He had seen him through both his good and bad times and most of all, he had seen him as he is now in the present, a blundering irresistible mess of a man.

Akaashi leaned forward in his seat, unsure himself what he was going to do until he did it. Slowly, his lips met the top of Bokuto’s head, and there they stayed, a moment too long.

“I’m coming,” Akaashi breathed, feeling his very being shake from the inside out. “I’m going.”

Bokuto hummed. Whether in his sleep or in recognition, Akaashi wasn’t sure, but soon enough, the guardian found himself blinking back the whiteness from the lounge.

Slowly, Akaashi sat up, feeling lighter than normal. His legs, his arms—everything felt tingly. Akaashi looked down at his hands. He wondered if he only imagined it, but he thought he saw his fingers disappear from view for a moment or two, his body losing visibility momentarily. Was he disappearing?

‘Come home,’ Bokuto had said.

Akaashi thought back to the folder in the office with the indicator reading Bokuto’s name.

‘It’s my ticket back home,’ Akaashi had told Bokuto.

‘It’s nothing important,’ Akaashi had said.

Bokuto had hummed in response.

‘ _Home_.’

Akaashi felt like an idiot. The folder was his ticket back home. Yet, the ‘home’ he was thinking of and the ‘home’ the folder actually led to were completely different places. How had he not realized it sooner?

A flash of light illuminated the lounge as both Tanaka and Tsukishima entered the lounge, the both of them looking as if they had long days.

Akaashi looked up and met Kenma’s concerned gaze before locking his eyes on those of the other two guardians. Time seemed as if it were standing still.

Making sure he had everyone’s attention, Akaashi held up his shaking arm to show his near-transparent limb.

“I don’t have all the answers, but, everyone,” Akaashi whispered, as if speaking any louder would break the spell over him. “I got it. I know how to disappear.”

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

“Are you sure you’re the one who’s supposed to be taking care of _me_? Isn’t it the other way around at this point?”

Oikawa burrowed his face into Iwaizumi’s shoulder and the doctor sighed, running a hand through the guardian’s hair. The reception room was quiet save for the occasional ticking from the clock on the wall. It had been several minutes since Bokuto had left, but it felt as if they had only been holding onto each other for a few seconds.

“You…” Iwaizumi began, swallowing thickly. “You didn’t even let me think of an answer back then.”

“I thought ‘I don’t know’ _was_ your answer.”

“Look,” Iwaizumi sighed. “I’ve been thinking.”

“Wow, that’s new, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa retorted with a breathy laugh, shoulders tensing in anticipation. “Don’t want to think too hard now or your brain will short circuit.”

Iwaizumi pulled back from their embrace and glared daggers at his guardian. “Are you still doing that shit? You know I hate it when you pretend like things are fine when it’s not.”

Oikawa blinked before feeling his expression soften. “One-track-mind like always, Iwa-chan.”

Iwaizumi scoffed. “You act like that’s a bad thing around you.”

Oikawa shook his head, swallowing thickly. “It’s not so bad.”

“I had a dream,” Iwaizumi began, a little hesitantly. “It… was something from the past, I think. I don’t remember too much of my childhood because there was a point where everything was all white… I was hospitalized for a long time. I don’t even remember what for…”

Oikawa listened without saying a word so Iwaizumi continued slowly after taking a deep breath.

“Was it you? The one who saved me from getting kidnapped?”

Oikawa laughed into Iwaizumi’s shoulder. “Iwa-chan, that’s unfair.”

“Hey, it’s unfair if you knew all this time and didn’t tell me at all.”

Oikawa hummed. “I guess it is.”

“Wow, you ass.”

Laughing lightly, Oikawa sighed, clinging onto Iwaizumi tighter. “It’s… it’s good to be back.”

Iwaizumi huffed, looking away. “W-welcome back. You’d better not leave again.”

Oikawa shivered at the thought, shaking his head resolutely. Iwaizumi smiled.

“C’mon, we can’t just stay here forever,” Iwaizumi murmured, getting up from the couch and gesturing for Oikawa to follow. “Let’s head back home.”

_Home._

Oikawa nodded, feeling the weight of several years loosen off his shoulders. That’s right. He was going home. He wasn’t going to an office or some lounge… he was going home.

Oikawa felt his soul shiver, his hands, his feet, his everything fading away. He laughed heartily. He had known all this time. He knew. In fact—Oikawa grabbed Iwaizumi’s hand loosely as his human squeezed back—he already _was_ home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We can talk abt gay owls @ my twitter tetsookie and tumblr greendoodle~ ! thank you for reading!! I actually had this chapter finished LONG ago I just hadn't felt very motivated to update it til now. if youre still keeping up w this I thank you a lot <3


	7. Graduation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _“You know, it doesn’t really make sense that we’re being punished as guardians.”_
> 
> _“Why do you say that?”_
> 
> _“If you think about it, our crimes aren’t really crimes,” at Akaashi’s stare, Tsukishima coughed, resolutely looking away. “Well, most of us anyway. But, how could a punishment be ‘look for your home’? Doesn’t make sense.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I wonder if anyone still remembers this fic, it's been a hot minute xD  
> Here's the very last chapter for this fic! I feel like _I've_ personally graduated from it, goodness. *wipes brow*
> 
> Anyway, hope you enjoy! Lots of sweetness, particularly with krtsk haha (but ofc w/bkak as well)! <3

The others didn’t take too lightly to the news.

“What defines  _ home _ ?” Tsukishima narrowed his eyes.

“Sounds embarrassing…” Kenma murmured in the background as Tanaka leaped up, brows furrowed in confusion.

“Yeah, yeah, also, what about Kenma? It still doesn’t explain his situation where two humans can see him!”

Akaashi felt his cheeks redden at Kenma’s input about embarrassment and coughed roughly. “I’m not sure, but, the definition may be different for each individual.”

Tsukishima scowled, palms upright to summon his headphones which appeared with a pop. As if to prove a point, he fit them over his ears and leaned on the back of the couch. “This shitty lounge is my home.”

“Yeah,” Tanaka added. “I mean, it’s not too comfortable, but whenever we’re tired, we come back here to rest and chill. Isn’t that what home is?”

“I can play games here,” Kenma chimed in quietly.

“See?” Tanaka pushed, looking at Akaashi as if he had proven his point. “I don’t think it’s anything we lack here that’s the problem.”

“But, doesn’t it feel like something’s missing?” Akaashi retorted, feeling a bit frustrated. “Like, those comic books you read… isn’t it always the same set of books every single time?”

“Yeah, but I mean…”

“And, Tsukishima,” Akaashi continued. “I’m more than certain that you haven’t had a wide selection of music to listen to.”

Tsukishima clicked his tongue, avoiding eye contact. “I have enough.”

“How many?”

“…one song.”

“See? And Kenma,” Akaashi turned to the guardian in question who seemed to tense up at the sudden attention. “Haven’t you been playing the same game for who knows how long?”

Quietly, Kenma muttered. “I could always restart it.”

Akaashi looked around at all of them. “I honestly don’t understand why this is so difficult to accept.”

“Because there’s still loopholes,” Tsukishima nearly spat, his temper running thin. “What about Kenma? Is disappearing actually a good thing or are we all just deceiving ourselves with pretty, little lies? What do we do if we become closer to our humans and nothing happens. What then, Akaashi-san?”

“You can deal with that once it actually happens,” Akaashi started a bit falteringly. “I mean, Kenji was obviously spending more time with his human than with us and he got to disappear.”

Scoffing, Tsukishima lay a hand on his hip before shooting Akaashi a look that could freeze water instantly. “For some of us ‘criminal’ types, getting ‘close to someone else’ is near impossible. It’s easier said than done—and I don’t want to hear otherwise coming from someone who doesn’t even know why he’s here.”

Akaashi snapped his mouth shut, feeling anger boil inside him, but unsure of what to say in response. After all, it was true he didn’t know why he was there to begin with. Was he there for a reason like Oikawa’s or one like Tsukishima’s? Or was it something else entirely? Since he had no way of knowing, there was nothing he could say. The guardians glared at each other, Tsukishima the more confident of the two. The tension that simmered in the room was thick enough to cut with a knife.

“W-well, I mean, it won’t hurt to try, right?” Tanaka chimed in hesitantly.

Everyone turned to look at him and they reluctantly agreed together. Despite the questions that continued to plague each of their minds, it was easier to just continue doing what they were doing—even if they had to invest a little more effort into their jobs than they did previously.

Akaashi sighed, running a hand across his temples.

He wanted to go  _ home _ .

 

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Despite all the resistance, Tanaka was the first to go.

Just like that, he left them without another word, half his name fading on the blank folders whenever the others tried to find him. There was some kind of irony to it, but Akaashi didn’t push it further. Even though it wasn’t explicitly stated, the guardians silently acknowledged that they were definitely on the right track now that one of the four was no longer with them.

It was infinitely quieter without Tanaka around. Akaashi, Kenma, and Tsukishima all seemed to make the room a little bit colder whenever they were present—not because of any instance of tenseness, but a problem of not knowing what to say while the others were there.

None of them would admit it, but they missed Tanaka.

Only a  _ little _ though.

Although there was a certain emptiness that surrounded the guardian’s name, it didn’t feel as dire as Oikawa’s name. After all, they were certain they had collectively called him by ‘Tanaka’ and nothing else.

…right?

Akaashi wondered why it was so easy to bring up his insecurities to Bokuto.

“So, you guys disappear randomly?” Bokuto’s eyes bulged, his legs ceasing to swing on the park bench. “Isn’t that kind of scary? Where do you even go?”

Keiji sighed, mindlessly running a finger along the sides of his folder. “Honestly, I don’t know anymore. It is kind of ominous when I think about it, but thinking about it doesn’t really solve anything so we just accept it happens.”

“Akaashi…” Bokuto stared at Keiji with concern shining in his eyes. Akaashi turned away, cheeks beginning to turn red.

“I—don’t worry too much about it Bokuto-san. I’m sure we’re meant to disappear anyways.”

“But, I don’t  _ want _ you to disappear! I want you to stay with me forever and ever, Akaashi!”

Akaashi flushed, unable to hide the rosiness of his face. “Wh—don’t be ridiculous, Bokuto-san. There’s no way that’s possible.”

Bokuto seemed to deflate like a balloon. “Is that what you want?”

Akaashi turned to him. “Huh?”

“To disappear?”

The guardian looked down at his hands that were glowing underneath the sunset. “Even if I wanted to disappear, I’m not certain I can.”

“Why not?”

“I think my body tried to a while back, but something was holding me back.”

“What?!” Bokuto leaped forward, leaning into Akaashi. “When?!”

“Bokuto-san, space, please,” Akaashi murmured, holding his hands up in front of his face to hide his twitching smile. Bokuto gave a short whine before sitting back down on the bench with a huff. “You were having a dream where you were stirring some coffee.”

Bokuto perked up immediately. “Were you there?!”

Akaashi gave the man a fond smile. “Yes, I was there.”

“Did you do something to make the bad feelings disappear?!”

Keiji blinked. “N-no, I don’t think so. But, you mentioned something about me and how you wanted me to come back to…”

Feeling really hot under his kimono, Akaashi meshed his fingers together as a defense mechanism. “Anyway, it did something and I felt myself getting lighter and lighter—my hands and feet disappearing slowly, but something stopped me.”

“Something?”

“I think it may be something to do with my past, but because I don’t know anything about my life as a human—” Akaashi’s memories flashed back to his conversation with Tsukishima which seemed to be forever ago. “I don’t know.”

“Akaashi, don’t cry…”

Keiji jumped at this, gently pushing his fingers onto his face to find that he was indeed collecting tears in his eyes. “What…”

He brought his sleeve up to wipe it away. “I don’t understand.”

“Akaashi…”

“I don’t understand.”

“You don’t have to understand. Heck, I kept chasing after you even if I didn’t fully understand, right? Isn’t… isn’t that the same thing?”

“I don’t know,” Akaashi shook his head, feeling the wetness gather on his kimono. Not knowing was hard. Yet, knowing was harder. What was the right path? He wasn’t sure. Would he ever be sure? “I want to understand.”

Akaashi felt himself being pulled into a hug and he felt a wetness that wasn’t his land on the back of his robes.

“Don’t cry, Akaashi… don’t cry. I don’t know how to fix it.”

“Bokuto-san, why are  _ you _ crying?”

“I don’t know. I noticed you crying and I started crying,” Bokuto sniffed, holding Akaashi tighter. “It hurts.”

Akaashi grasped the back of Bokuto’s jacket. “What does?”

“Something—I don’t know. The bottom of my heart.”

“How strange, we’re hurting in the same places,” Akaashi near whispered, as if he was about to lose something he just discovered. “I didn’t feel like this when you broke your arm though.”

“Didn’t you feel bad for me?”

“Not particularly.”

Bokuto pulled back, a pout forming on his lips. “Mean, Akaashi.”

Akaashi exhaled a laugh. “Sorry.”

“Hey!” Bokuto exclaimed, looking down at his chest area. Akaashi blinked in surprise. “It’s gone!”

“What?”

“The pain is gone!”

“In your heart?”

“Yeah!” Bokuto suddenly gasped, looking at Akaashi with stars in his eyes. “Is this why you started crying when you met me again after all those years?”

“Huh?”

“Maybe our hearts are connected!”

“I don’t…”

“C’mon, Akaashi, we’ve both cried when one of us have been sad. It makes sense, right?”

Akaashi paused, mulling it over. Even though it was weird to admit it, Bokuto did have a point. Akaashi didn’t even know Bokuto too well until he got to hang out with him after his high school years, and yet, after their first meeting, Akaashi had greeted Bokuto with fresh tears in his eyes, crying for a reason he himself wasn’t sure about. Akaashi felt light-headed.

“Are you sure it’s not just you being clingy?”

Bokuto pouted. “You cried first.”

“I did,” Akaashi responded, feeling a featherweight lightness enveloping his body. “But, you cried with me.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kenma wasn’t sure what to do with the new information Akaashi had given them that morning. He knew he had to get closer with Hinata which was difficult enough already, but he also had to do his job all with the realization that he shared hearts with his human? What did that even mean?

Tucking his folder under his arm, Kenma set out again for his human’s location—probably the gymnasium if he was going by process of elimination. He was surprised when he ended up right in front of Hinata and Kageyama kissing in his human’s room.

Well, surprise wasn’t the right word—at least, not for him.

“Kenma?” Hinata half-shrieked, half-yelped, throwing his arms over his face and hiding a blush behind his cheeks.

“Hi, Shouyou.”

“I didn’t know you were coming!”

“I didn’t think I’d end up here either.” Kenma murmured. He looked at Kageyama who was beet red, even more so than Hinata. The taller boy seemed constipated, his eyes looking down and away from Kenma, brows furrowed.

Hinata laughed sheepishly and rubbed the back of his head, shuffling away from his boyfriend, to Tobio’s discontent.

Kenma gave his human a soft smile. It had been a while since they had first met—back when Hinata had knocked the guardian out with a volleyball to the face. Since then, he’d become quite close with the redheaded teen, watching him grow up, watching him graduate… He had watched the boy become closer with Kageyama and was present when the two confessed their feelings for each other—feelings that were way too obvious, to be completely blunt. Kenma didn’t understand how both of them were oblivious to the fact, but he digresses.

It felt strangely nostalgic, being able to share these memories with Hinata, but not be directly involved in the boy’s life. Although he approved of Kageyama, he didn’t know what to say around the taller man. Even if Kageyama could see the guardian, there were still limits to his capabilities.

For one, Kageyama could see Kenma, but he could not touch him. This was strange because no other human could see Kozume other than the two lovebirds in front of him. Try as they might, Kageyama could not bring himself to touch Kenma. His hand seemed to phase right through him or he lost his sense of balance halfway towards contact. They tried numerous things such as having Kageyama toss a ball in Kenma’s direction, the guardian albeit standing a little shakily in anticipation of the impact. But, no matter what they did, nothing worked. In contrast, Hinata casually wrapped his arm around Kenma from time to time and invited the guardian to play video games with him every now and then. Although Kenma himself found it difficult to mash the controls—feeling tingly when doing so—it was a nice change of pace from playing that one video game over and over back in the lounge.

There was also the issue where Kageyama did not see Kenma all the time. In most cases, this wasn’t true because Kageyama was most definitely present whenever Hinata was around. After all, the two were inseparable when it came to volleyball. Kageyama more or less accepted whenever Kenma showed up, and Kenma was content with the conversation gap that Hinata filled between Kageyama and the guardian. Neither of them were as extroverted as the redhead after all.

Yet, there were a few off days. Mostly these took place whenever the two had a big fight. Whenever Kageyama yelled and Hinata screamed back, fighting about things that seemed trivial, Kenma flitted in and out of focus in the taller boy’s eyes. Kozume wasn’t sure why that was, but after hearing Akaashi’s explanation, he had a hunch.

Those nights were hard and sometimes, Kenma asked whether or not being in a relationship was worth all the trouble. The pain that prickled his human’s heart had pierced the depths of his soul as well, much to his disagreement. Was it truly all for the best? Wouldn’t it be easier to let go? Was it worth all the hurt?

Hinata had smiled sadly under his bedsheets and curling up harder, simply responded, “I miss him.”

Kenma felt a pang of regret for asking after seeing that face.

One thing was for certain. The two had a special connection that Kenma could not even begin to meet.

But, strangely enough, he wasn’t jealous or upset.

Kenma had known what kind of relationship Oikawa had had with his human and he had also known why it was so easy for Akaashi to come up with the conclusion of ‘home’—as if it were something obvious that he knew all that time, but never managed to pinpoint its meaning until that day.

Yet, Kenma was positive that this relationship he had with his human was something entirely different. It wasn’t one where he should feel jealous or upset, though he did feel a certain  _ something _ akin to possessiveness.

Some of Tanaka’s last words had echoed through his head. “Is it something like a threesome?”

Kozume had shown his immediate disapproval of that idea. It might have worked for another guardian, but for Kenma, three was a crowd. Tsukishima had stifled a laugh behind his hands, pretending to be occupied with something he was listening to. Akaashi had rested his head in his hands, thinking about the feasibility of such a relationship for guardians.

No. It wasn’t that.

It wasn’t a ridiculous notion like the one Tanaka proposed for the quiet, reserved guardian. That much was for certain.

‘ _ Home _ .’

What defined that? What made his human home as well? Kenma certainly wasn’t destined to define home as ‘being a third wheel for all eternity.’ At least, he should hope not.

“Did you want to go somewhere, Kenma?” Hinata chirped.

Kenma blinked, his thoughts shifting away from the notion of ‘home.’ He shook his head, a finger pointed towards the door. “I’ll leave you two in peace.”

“Are you sure? We could totally play something!”

“Boke, just let him go.”

“Hah?! Why do you need to insult me every single time you talk? Is your vocabulary really that small?”

Kenma watched as the two commenced their little spat and shrugged to himself, making his way to leave through the sliding panel entrance. There were still a lot of things that were unclear to him and it was hard to think while the two lovebirds were glued to each other. He’d come back another time. Preferably, when Hinata had a mouth to talk to him with.

 

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tsukishima had avoided this “date” for the longest time.

Heck, he had personally made sure that his human was occupied before making an appearance, whether he be busy with work or play—he chose to show himself only after it was clear Kuroo couldn’t go anywhere or do anything about it.

And, it was obviously driving the bedhead insane.

“Tsukki,” he pleaded for the umpteenth time that month. “Can you  _ please _ time your appearances better? I’m in the middle of class right now.”

“I know.”

Kuroo gave Tsukishima something akin to an exasperated sigh before patting the guardian on the back and leaping away to fulfill his assignments. “Promise me!”

Tsukishima smirked as he watched his human run off and definitely made the mental note  _ not _ to promise anything.

After all, it wasn’t in his contract to baby his humans, much less go on  _ dates _ with them. The very idea was absurd, preposterous even.

Heck, he could probably get closer to Kuroo just by observing the man. After all, Tsukishima did know more about Kuroo than he did about any of the previous humans he has had. He was already on the right track. Right?

Tsukishima frowned. What was he even second-guessing for? Of course, there was no doubt he was doing his job effectively and didn’t need any miscellaneous ‘social activities’ to prove it.

Looking over at Kuroo, Tsukishima saw the bedhead lock eyes with him a moment, wink, and then drop some type of green liquid into a beaker in his gloved hand. The mixture bubbled for a moment before giving off a soft fizzing noise and becoming still once more.

Sighing, Tsukishima leaned back in his stool. As exciting as this lukewarm display of chemistry was, he was ready to leave for the safety of the lounge at any moment. Standing up and grabbing his folder, Tsukishima made to shake its contents when Kuroo barreled himself into the guardian.

“Kuroo, what the hell—”

“Tsukki, wait!” Kuroo held his hands up in defense as if he didn’t mean to slam right into Tsukishima’s side with the force of a panther. “Let’s have our date this Saturday!”

Tsukishima inwardly groaned. “You don’t want to have a date with me.”

“Don’t be like that; it’ll be fun!”

Kei scowled. “Fun is subjective.”

“I know you’ll probably make a huge scene of not coming, but I’m planning some dangerous activities for us to do, so you  _ have  _ to come to make sure I’m alright, right?”

Tsukishima clicked his tongue. He remembered the last time a guardian was sucked out through the portal because their human decided to be an idiot and jump right into a vat of snakes. ‘It’d be fun,’ the idiot had said. ‘I’m going to play more than anyone else at this festival!’ His guardian was a kind soul who was patient enough with him to make sure he got out alive, but boy, was she exhausted afterwards.

“What time?”

“Ten in the morning! So, is that a yes?” Kuroo grinned, ear-to-ear. Tsukishima found it embarrassing to be completely honest, that someone could smile like that.

“That’s only if you don’t have to take remedial classes.” Tsukishima smirked as the table where Kuroo was brewing his concoction made a popping noise and hot flares started spewing out of his transparent flasks, landing on nearby students and desks.

“Crap!” Kuroo yelped in alarm, looking back at his work and sprinting to reach his brew in time. Tsukishima nearly burst out in laughter at the sight of it all. Kuroo definitely was the one who teased others easily, but the guardian felt a certain satisfaction in seeing the normally composed man fumble.

With that pleasant thought in mind, Tsukishima resolutely gave his folder a firm shake, watching as his surroundings vanished around him. The last thing he heard above the noisiness of the classroom was a final farewell from his would-be date.

“See you then, Tsukki!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Whiteness.

Akaashi blinked rapidly in order to clear it, but to no avail. Was he in the doorway, headed someplace far away? Yet, his feet stayed, chained to the floor, as if he were laying down with a weight on his chest that was preventing him from moving.

Eventually, the scenery cleared and he found himself in a bed somewhere. Things began to materialize. His head felt woozy, and he still couldn’t bring himself to move around, though his eyes were free to wander.

Akaashi saw a few things with this cleared vision. A television, a barred window, some railings that were attached to the bed where he was laying. Wait, railings?

Looking closer, Akaashi saw that there were indeed bar-like structures erected, keeping him getting up or rolling off accidentally. Akaashi tried to move his hand to feel the supports, but his arms seemed to lay uselessly at his sides, chained to something. Slowly, gradually, a steady beeping noise sounded nearby.

He tried shaking his body, and saw something out of the corner of his eye sway back and forth like vines. What?

This was definitely a dream. Of that much, he was sure. But, it didn’t seem like a dream that Bokuto would have. In fact, the entire scene seemed very familiar, but he couldn’t place why.

Was this… his past?

There was a fuzziness in his brain he couldn’t shake. He felt himself drift, his eyes close, his limbs lose all feeling until Akaashi found himself laying back on the couch in the lounge.

Gingerly, he sat up, feeling a bit foreign in his own body. He clenched, unclenched, and then clenched his fingers, wondering if the static-like sensation was a result of his disappearance. His limbs seemed to be quite tangible. Akaashi frowned, a million questions flittering through his mind.

As much as he wanted to ask Bokuto what the dream was about, Akaashi felt like it was one experience he didn’t want to talk about. Strangely enough, he wanted to process it on his own. It felt personal to him.

He stood up and stretched, deciding that heading to the office to clear his mind would be the best course of action.

Upon reaching the room, he was surprised to find Kenma quietly digging through the shelves.

“Changing your human?”

Kenma started, looking up to see Akaashi before his shoulders drooped, the tension fading. “No, I’m just looking at other descriptions.”

“Descriptions?”

Akaashi sat down next to Kenma on the floor, watching as the shorter man shuffled through a few folders before frowning and shoving the files back in their rightful places.

“What kind of descriptions?”

Kenma muttered something incoherent to himself before speaking up louder so that Akaashi could hear. “Of home.”

“Ah, right.”

The two stayed together in silence save for the rustling of paper from Kenma’s search. Akaashi wondered what the difference between his home and Kenma’s home was. Akaashi put his arms around his knees, resting his head on top of them.

“What is your human to you, Kenma?”

Kenma paused, thinking, hand halfway reaching for another file. “He’s… my friend.”

“Are you sure about that?”

The shorter man nodded. “Positive. He’s a warm person. My friend.”

“Nothing more, nothing less?”

“Nothing more. Nothing less.”

“And, what is home to you?”

“I don’t know,” Kenma began, slowly grabbing a couple more folders from the bookshelf before resting his hands on his lap. “When I was alive, my physical home wasn’t exactly someplace I would look forward to going back to.”

Akaashi looked straight ahead, mindlessly staring at the gap between a few of the bottom files. “That must’ve been hard.”

“Not really,” Kenma shrugged, flipping through the folders he had collected once more. “I didn’t know anything else.”

“What was it like?”

Kenma stopped, humming in recollection. “Really shitty.”

Akaashi laughed, wondering if it was even appropriate to do so. “I can imagine.”

“I don’t really remember my mom because I was on the streets with several other kids my age for as long as I can remember. We took turns going out and stealing food, water, and daily necessities. But, one day some kid decided to take everything for himself and we all got into a huge fight. From then on, I worked alone.”

“How old were you?”

“I don’t remember. Probably 14 or 15 or something.”

“That’s horrible.”

The shorter guardian shrugged, shelving the folders again. “I didn’t get the shortest end of the stick.”

Akaashi stared at him incredulously. “You got  _ executed _ .”

“That was later.”

“Still.”

“It was my fault for getting caught. Usually, the store owners let kids off for stealing food, but I was legal by that time. I should have gotten a respectable job, but I was still stealing things.”

“It’s hard to get a respectable job if you’re starving.”

Kenma exhaled, a sad smile on his lips. “I guess.”

“There was no orphanage to go to or a place you could stay permanently?”

“No, I think our backwater town was going through a long period of financial debt. A lot of us did come from the bankrupt orphanage.”

“In Japan?”

“No,” Kenma murmured as if he was unsure himself. “Somewhere far. It’s kind of hard to remember where you’re from if you hated being there.”

“I’m sorry.”

Kenma blinked, turning to look at Akaashi’s hands that were twiddling uncomfortably. “Why?”

“I don’t know, I just am.”

“That’s silly.”

Akaashi snorted even though he found nothing funny. “I guess so.”

Separating his fingers, the guardian reached forward to help Kenma with his task of looking for any mentions of home in the human files.

“Do you ever get jealous of the lives your humans have?”

“Not really. Shouyou lets me do what I want.”

“But, do you ever feel… sad?”

Kenma stayed silent, putting more files away. Akaashi figured that that was his answer.

“What comes to your mind when thinking of him?”

“He’s loud. Excitable. But, he feels like a warm hug. He always knows what to say when I run out of topics of talk about.” Kenma began, a faint flush in his cheeks. “He’s… like the sun.”

“But, not romantically?”

“No. He already has someone. It’s probably why he can see me.”

Akaashi tilted his head in confusion.

“You said it yourself, right? Our hearts are connected. Rather, it’s more like, because we don’t have human organs ourselves, we borrow the organs of our humans. That’s why we feel pain whenever they feel pain and we feel joy whenever they feel joy.”

“Right,” Akaashi responded. “But, why do they feel our pain and joy as well?”

“I think it’s only after a certain point. It starts off as a one-way annoyance and then turns into a two-way obligation.”

Akaashi smirked. “Both those words technically mean ‘nuisance,’ you know.”

“Anyway,” Kenma replied, a hint of amusement in his voice. “Because his heart belongs to his boyfriend, it’s only natural he sees me too.”

“Makes sense,” Akaashi mused. “Would you like him romantically if he didn’t have someone?”

“No. I think it’d get tiring.”

“And yet, you can find  _ home _ in him?”

Kenma halted, as if considering this feasibility. “…yes.”

At this, the shorter guardian stood up, placing the folders in his hands away before grabbing the one labeled ‘Hinata Shouyou’ and heading towards the door. “Well then.”

“Have a safe trip.”

“Yeah,” Kenma offered Akaashi a smile. “You too.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Kozume was a thinker.

Given his past life, it was something that was ingrained into him. He had to do everything by himself, for himself because after all, he was his most important person. He didn’t have anyone else to lean on—not in this life or the next.

Well, that wasn’t completely true.

There was one person he knew briefly who provided for him when he was young. gvHis name… Kenma forgot. He only called him ‘Tora.’ It was too long since then, but he did remember a mean look and a shaved head with a bleached middle. The man took everyone in—those from the orphanage and those who weren’t. And he cared for them the best he could.

Kenma probably bleached his hair because of him. The man was kind of awkward, and thug-like, but he stayed after the orphanage was demolished and everyone had lost hope. He was the only one who stayed. Nobody knew where he came from, but wherever he was from, he made it clear he would rather stay with them.

The days it got too hard, he went out and got provisions for the rest of them, always making sure his portion was the least as if Kenma didn’t notice. He was a bit of an idiot, to be completely honest, to opt out of eating like that.

Scratch that—very much an idiot.

Yet, he cared and he stole for them. He was like a big brother, the way he laughed, the way he smiled, the way he made sure they were all surviving. Whenever he pet Kenma’s head, it felt weird, unnatural. Kozume brushed his arm away, complaining every time, but in actuality, it wasn’t that bad.

One thing Kenma was grateful for was Tora being the reason he got interested in video games. The man had gone out and come back with consoles the kids had never seen before ranging from small handheld devices to gigantic gadgets that needed to be hooked up to a television. Tora had taken Kozume aside and handed him the most expensive handheld game, telling the boy to keep it their little secret. The two had something akin to a tight bond, though Kenma didn’t notice it himself until it was too late.

One day, one of the older kids stole all the backup food for himself. Tora got into a fight with him and not long after, it turned into an all-out fist war. No one was happy with the amount of food he or she was receiving. They turned on Tora.

That night, it was probably the closest Kenma felt to losing family.

Even so, life goes on. Kozume carried onwards without looking back. Life on the streets didn’t allow him to cry or mourn.

Should he have defended the man? Should he have done something more? There’s not much he remembers from that night, except feeling an emptiness in his stomach, and a gap in his chest.

Kenma wondered. Was Tora  _ home _ ? This person he looked up to as a big brother was definitely one of the only people he cared about. Did he think of Shouyou as a sibling to look after? Was that what his definition of ‘ _ home _ ’ was?

“Agh, I forgot to bring my wallet!”

Kenma watched as his human dug into his pockets frantically, eyeing the meat buns in the store with an amusing kind of primal hunger. The two of them were on their way back home, passing by a small convenience store before heading up the mountain. Upon realizing he didn’t have the cash, Hinata sighed, shoulders slumping. “Guess I’ll go home and eat.”

“…Shouyou, wait here.”

“Hm?”

But, Kenma was already off, sneaking into the store and grabbing a few of the heated dough treats off the shelves before making his way outside. He handed one to Hinata, the guardian’s cheeks flushing with the exertion of thieving once more.

“Here, eat it,” Kenma huffed, looking pleased with the fruits of his labor.

Shouyou, on the other hand, did not look happy at all.

“Why’d you do that, Kenma?”

Kenma blinked. “Huh?”

“You can’t just steal something you want like that!”

“Why not?”

“It’s not… it’s not right!”

Kenma nearly bristled. “I told you about my past.”

“That’s different!”

“How’s that different? I was hungry so I stole, and you’re hungry so I stole. It’s the same thing!”

“I’m not  _ starving _ !”

“I don’t know, you could’ve fooled me,” Kenma near-spat, uncertain why he was so angry. “Sorry for doing my job and caring for you.”

Hinata stammered, looking half-upset and half-concerned. Kenma buried his face into his kimono. It was winter now, but thankfully, their clothes adjusted to meet the seasons. It felt nice to feel the softness of the thick, fluffy cloth. Even if he couldn’t feel the cold, it definitely  _ looked _ cold so Kenma probably subconsciously felt it in the depths of his soul.

Telling Kenma to wait outside, Hinata went back in and apologized to the store manager for taking the buns. The worker seemed upset, but was happy enough to see Shouyou was attempting to mend the wrong. Kenma shuffled his feet in the snow, taking interest in the way the ice crackled under his feet. He hadn’t really noticed how pretty snow was while he was alive. Winter usually came with a whole slew of troubles that he didn’t want to deal with. Summer was also bad, but at least there was sunlight.

There was a ding from the bell on the swinging door and Kenma looked up to find Hinata jogging towards him, a small smile on his face.

The walk back was quiet. Even though Kozume appreciated the finer joys of silence, this kind of hushed trek home was a bit unsettling. More than once he thought about shaking his folder and leaving the boy to walk back alone. He wasn’t sure what was holding him back—maybe the fact that he’d feel worse about appearing again if the last conversation they had was a fight. Not that that’s stopped him before.

“Kenma, wait outside a minute!”

Kozume stopped, watching as Hinata made a dash into his house. Kenma stared at the name template engraved on the stone that read ‘Hinata Household.’ Soon, Hinata came bounding out with a couple of scarves and his wallet.

“One for you!” Hinata chimed as he wrapped the red scarf around Kenma’s neck. The guardian felt his nose nuzzle with the silky fabric.

“Guardians don’t get cold.”

“You never know!”

“I do…”

“C’mon,” Hinata chirped, taking Kenma’s hand and setting off back down the road to a different, closer convenience store. Once the two arrived, Hinata gave a breathy grin and they walked in together where they were greeted with a curt ‘welcome.’

Kenma followed Hinata as the redhead walked around the store, eventually picking out two meat buns and bringing them to the cashier. After paying, the two left, a paper bag of warm pastries in hand.

“Here!” Hinata exclaimed, pulling a bun out and handing it to Kenma.

“Why?”

“What do you mean, why? Because I wanted to share with you!”

“I’m dead, Shouyou. I don’t need to eat. You should eat both.”

Hinata looked sad, his arm dropping a bit. Still, he continued to insist. “C’mon, just a bite!”

Kenma watched the stream rise from the bun. When was the last time he’d had food like this when he was alive? Hesitantly, he took it into his hands and took a nibble, wondering a little too late whether or not guardians could digest food.

It was warm. The dough was soft and the inside was hearty, the two mixing together in a neat package, filling an emptiness in his stomach Kenma didn’t realize he had. He took a bite, and then another, and another, until he couldn’t stop eating, finishing the entire bun by himself.

“Kenma, are you okay?”

Kozume started, noting tears falling from his cheeks. The tears were warm against his skin, they were salty against his lips, they were ultimately not supposed to be there at all.

“If you like it that much, I could get more!” Hinata said, concern in his voice.

The guardian shook his head, wiping the tears on his sleeve.

He didn’t want more, he wanted less.

Kenma was a thinker, not a feeler. Yet, all at once, he felt. And, it was too much.

“Shouyou, why do you care so much?”

“Eh,” Hinata tilted his head in confusion, as if the answer was obvious. “Because you’re my friend Kenma!”

Kozume laughed breathily, his voice coming out in rasps.

“Has… anyone told you that you’re like the sun?”

Hinata hummed in thought. “Am I?”

“You’re warm, you’re soft… you give life to those around you.”  Kenma continued, knowing that he was rambling and finding that he couldn’t bring himself to stop. “You inspire others with your hospitality, but you’re strong on the inside. You’re like this meat bun.”

“Oh, that’s…” Hinata furrowed his brows. “Cool? I think? I think being like the sun is cooler though!”

“Honestly, you’re kind of like Tora. Though, a bit clumsier.”

“Tora?”

“He was… something like my hero. Though, a stupid one, at that,” Kenma took a deep, shaky breath, closing his eyes and willing the tears to stop. “He did a lot of dumb things because he cared. …is that what home is?”

“Kenma?!”

Kozume opened his eyes to see his limbs starting to fade away.

‘Ah,’ he thought. ‘I get it now.’

Your care, your love, your friendship. That was home.

Home didn’t have to be romantic, nor familial. Tora was temporary, but Shouyou gave him something permanent that he never thought he’d have. Not after the fights in his ravaged hometown, not after the spats with people who lived close to him but, couldn’t have been farther away. Not after living on his own for years, and years, and years.

“Kenma, what’s happening? Are you disappearing? No, wait, not yet!”

Kenma moved forward to hug Hinata, feeling the boy’s warmth envelop his body.

“Thank you,” the scarf rested comfortably on Kozume’s neck, soft, warm, and very much like everything Shouyou was, is, and was destined to be. The snow fell like feathers around them, beautiful and fleeting.

Kenma felt like he was taking flight. He breathed heavily, a whisper the last words on his dissipating lips.

“Thank you for being my  _ home _ .”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“You know, it doesn’t really make sense that we’re being punished as guardians.”

Akaashi blinked, looking up from the files on his desk. Tsukishima was sitting nearby at the side table in the room, his headphones snugly fastened around his ears. The taller man was not making eye contact with him, but by the tone of his voice, seemed to be making conversation with Keiji.

“Why do you say that?”

“If you think about it, our crimes aren’t really  _ crimes _ ,” at Akaashi’s stare, Tsukishima coughed, resolutely looking away. “Well, most of us anyway. But, how could a punishment be ‘look for your home’? Doesn’t make sense.”

Silently, Akaashi moved aside the blank folders labeled ‘Kozume’ finding that he couldn’t help himself from agreeing. Rather than punish them, this guardian job seemed to be doing the opposite. For what reason, he couldn’t fathom why.

Akaashi sighed, setting the files aside and placing the one for his human on top of the stack. “I mean, we’re never sure anything makes sense, right?”

“Like, why  _ you’re _ here.”

“Don’t remind me,” Akaashi rolled his eyes, getting up to shelf some of the folders he didn’t need. “It’s not like I don’t wonder about that every day.”

“Usually those who can’t remember their previous life had some kind of brain issue before they passed.”

“Brain issue?”

“Like a concussion or brainwashing—that kind of thing.”

“That doesn’t sound familiar,” Akaashi made a face as Tsukishima shrugged.

“Of course it wouldn’t if your entire memory was altered.”

“Uhuh,” Akaashi responded blankly, grabbing Bokuto’s folder and heading towards the door.

Tsukishima gave Akaashi a look. “You going?”

“Yeah, I think Kozume is gone for good, but please keep looking for the other half of his name.”

“Sure,” Tsukishima murmured, looking like he was definitely  _ not _ going to be doing that.

Akaashi sighed, but didn’t push it further, making his way out the entrance. He knew that Tsukishima was feeling nervous in his own way about his meeting with his human. Akaashi had faith though that the man would be able to pull off their arrangement with efficiency. After all, it wasn’t anything like a date, right? In the nothingness, Akaashi watched as the light enveloped him from head to toe once more.

He didn’t need to walk far before finding Bokuto at the convenience store, buying some onigiri at the counter. The man turned around and nearly yelped upon seeing Akaashi’s sudden appearance.

“A-Akaashi!”

Keiji smiled. “Hello, Bokuto-san.”

Bokuto laughed, making his way out of the store. “When did you start calling me that, again?”

Akaashi blinked. “What?”

“‘-san.’”

“Hm… I don’t remember. Do you not like it?”

“No, no, I like it!” Bokuto grinned, gesturing for them to head to a table in the sun. “It feels very natural.”

“How so?”

“I don’t know.” Bokuto mused, a hand on his chin. “Familiar somehow!”

“Familiar… speaking of which, Bokuto-san, were you in a hospital before?”

Bokuto stopped unwrapping his onigiris to stare at Akaashi. “Yeah, I’ve been in hospitals before—hasn’t everyone?”

“No, no, I meant—have you been hospitalized and bedridden?”

Bokuto furrowed his brows, handing the unwrapped mess of rice and seaweed to Akaashi. “Not that I remember. Other than when you were there.”

“Oh,” Akaashi said, taking the meal into his hands. “Because, I had a dream… I don’t… guardians don’t get dreams so I thought it was something to do with you.”

Bokuto slurped up some rice that fell from his lips. “What happened in the dream?”

“I was lying in a bed and everything was white. The sheets were white, the wall was white, the sunlight that streamed through the window was white. I was hooked up to some IVs and it was hard to move. It felt oddly familiar.”

“Maybe that’s something from your past!”

“I…” Akaashi took a bite of his onigiri. Salty. “I wonder.”

“Is there anything else you remember? Any other details?”

Akaashi squinted as if that would help his memory. “My head felt fuzzy.”

“Good fuzzy? Bad fuzzy?”

Keiji snorted. “There are different types of fuzziness?”

“Of course, there are! There’s like, ‘oh, I’m falling asleep it’s so nice and soft’ kind of fuzziness and then there’s ‘wow, I worked too hard today I’m falling over’ kind of fuzziness!”

“Bokuto-san, it’s worrying how you described both. Does that mean you’ve done both? Hopefully not within the same time frame?”

“A-anyways!” Bokuto nearly choked, pounding on his chest a little to invite air into his lungs. “Which one was it?”

“It felt like a combination of both, to be completely honest.”

Bokuto hummed, chewing thoughtfully (which Akaashi wasn’t sure was a thing that existed until today) before responding. “Were you sick?”

Akaashi paused, feeling a strange  _ something _ swirl in his stomach. His breaths seemed to come out in short spurts. “I…”

“Maybe you got sick and that’s why you were tired, but the doctors gave you medicine which made you feel sleepy and soft!”

“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi choked out, his head spinning. He clutched his head in his hands, the onigiri he was holding falling to the floor. Bokuto was immediately at his side.

“Akaashi?! Akaashi, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”

Akaashi shook his head, unable to do much else. Bokuto’s questions were drowned out by the thudding in his ears. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to organize the flood of memories that were creeping in, overflowing, overbearing. He was drowning.

‘Sick.’

‘Medicine.’

‘Hospital.’

‘Sick. Medicine. Hospital.’

‘Sickness. Medication. Hospitalized.’

“That boy, always pretending he has it harder than the rest of us. Why doesn’t he consider how  _ we _ feel?”

“Does he  _ know _ how much these fees cost? Honestly, he should carry himself in a more refined way. He comes from our prestigious household after all!”

“It’s all her fault. How could she do such a thing?”

“It’s a shame. He could have done  _ so _ much more if it weren’t for his temperament. It truly is a goddamn shame.”

“Honestly,  _ good riddance _ .”

Coughing violently, Akaashi clutched onto Bokuto. A voice? A memory. Something was resurfacing and he didn’t want it. He was scared. Was he going back? To a time he had no recollection of, to people he didn’t know?

“Akaashi? Akaashi, stay with me, Akaashi! Agh, fuck, what do I do?”

“Bokuto…-san.”

“Akaashi! Akaashi, deep breaths! Crap, I gotta stay calm too. Don’t worry, Akaashi, I’m here, everything will be okay, just hold my hand. Just hold…”

Clutching onto Bokuto made the pain more manageable, though the rapid beating in his skull was still there. Akaashi slurped the air around him greedily, trying to regulate his breathing, trying to regulate his everything. He didn’t know what he was doing. He wanted to know, but at the same time, he didn’t.

And suddenly, he was there.

After a moment of black, there he stood, many years younger, hands behind his back, hair neatly tucked behind his ears, looking up at his parents apprehensively.

“Keiji, this is aunt Kaori. She will be taking care of you until you finish high school.”

“It is nice to meet you, Kaori-san.” Akaashi bowed.

“Wow, it’s true what they say, he really is the perfect child! What manners! I’m impressed!”

“Thank you, Kaori-san.” Akaashi bowed once more.

“Does… does he show any bit of emotion at all though? He seems a bit robotic, don’t you think?”

“Oh, it’s fine, as long as he succeeds the family properly, isn’t that right, Keiji?”

“Yes, father.”

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Kaori look down at him with worry etched in her features. What a weird person, he had thought. What a weird person, indeed.

The scene changed and he was in middle school, his dress shirt prim and proper, walking through the aisles of his new school. His parents were too busy to deal with him so his aunt was taking care of him at a small country home on the outskirts of the city. She had gone to lengths to ensure he led a ‘normal’ life for a kid. Whatever that meant.

“There he is, that uptight kid,” a voice echoed through the halls.

“You’re right, wow, he’s kind of creepy, don’t you think?”

“Apparently, he was rich, but now that his parents hate him, he’s gotta fit in with us  _ commoners _ .”

“Ew, I don’t wanna catch the Keiji!”

“Please don’t let me sit next to him in class. He’s a weirdo.”

“Look, look, he’s coming!”

Akaashi passed by the students, giving them a curt nod before continuing on his way. He would not show fear. He would not show weakness. That would not be becoming of his family. His heritage. It would not make father happy. It would not make mother proud.

Without realizing it, he started picking nervously behind his back at his fingers.

Now he was in his room with Kaori and his father who had come to visit to speak about financial affairs. In a quiet voice, Keiji whispered.

“Father, I don’t want to go. I want to stay with aunt Kaori.”

“Excuse me?” his father roared, his eyes ablaze with rage. “No son of mine will say such useless things in my presence. You will continue your extra curriculars—all of them—is that clear? And you will do them under our strict guidance. That is what it means to lead the Akaashi household.”

“Please, he’s just a child,” Kaori begged. “Give him more freedom to breathe.”

“I  _ did  _ give him freedom and what has that done? He is being picked on by the other kids?! This is what happens when a country bumpkin takes care of children. You have corrupted my boy!”

“It’s not his fault he’s being bullied!”

“Yes, that fault lies solely with  _ you _ .”

His dad grabbed his arm and Akaashi felt himself being roughly yanked away. He watched as his relative’s face contort into one of grief and sadness. He closed his eyes. He’d never see his aunt again.

This time he was in front of a school desk, surrounded by his parents on both sides, the principal heaving a sigh in front of them.

“As I said, I believe your child requires medical help. His essays have been proof his mental health issues need to be addressed as soon as possible.”

“Ridiculous. Keiji, tell the principal that you’re feeling fine.”

Akaasih opened his mouth and something caught in his throat.

“Keiji, dear, you need to tell your principal that you’re fine or he won’t let us leave.”

“Now, don’t pressure the lad. He’s in high school, he can make his own decisions,” the man started, but was stopped by Akaashi’s voice.

“I’m fine, sir.”

“Are you sure? We can get you psychiatric help if you need.”

“It’s fine, sir.”

The principal’s face softened. “Is that so? Well, feel free anytime to come visit the nurse’s office. This may be a prestigious school, but we value our students’ health more than wealth or status.”

“That’s nice to hear,” Akaashi’s father said, getting up from his chair and gesturing for the rest of his family to do the same. “I will keep that in mind as I decide where next to send my son. I will not allow my boy to attend a school where they accuse him of being mentally ill. That is absolutely absurd and highly unprofessional.”

The principal rose from his seat as well. “Now, just wait a minute—”

Akaashi’s head burned and the scene changed for the last time. It was the same place he had seen in his dream which he now knew to be a recollection. Whiteness enveloped all sides, his clothes, his bed, everything around him.

Groggily, he looked over to read the label on the IV which read ‘overdose patient.’

‘Huh,’ Akaashi thought, his mind unclear, foggy. ‘How about that.’

His brain went dead.

“Akaashi?”

Akaashi blinked back the sunlight hitting his eyes. From his position, he seemed to be laying on someone’s lap and looking up, Keiji found himself staring into Bokuto’s golden, golden, golden eyes.

“Koutarou.”

Bokuto laughed a little, choking back tears. “Oh, thank god. I didn’t—I didn’t know what to do, Akaashi. I didn’t… I didn’t know.”

He leaned in, embracing Akaashi in a tight hug. “Don’t do that again.”

“Hah,” Akaashi exhaled breathily, his voice coming out raspy and shallow. “I’m not even sure I could if I wanted to.”

Akaashi sat up, shaking the stars out of his eyes. Bokuto hands hovered nearby, ready to catch him if he fell. “Y-you okay, Akaashi?”

“Yes,” Keiji smiled, turning to look at Bokuto. “Thanks to you.”

“What happened?”

“I think I had a bit of a vision about my past.”

“A vision?”

Akaashi spent some time accounting his memories to Bokuto. The way he grew up in a rich, strict household, the way he was bullied for the lofty way he spoke in middle school, and the way he was ostracized for making contact with commoners in high school. Bokuto listened intently through it all, brows furrowed for most of the recollection. And finally, Akaashi relayed how he ended up dying.

“At a certain point, it just wasn’t worth it anymore so I just…”

“You swallowed all those pills.”

Keiji nodded, feeling a numbness in his brain. It was nice to know the truth, but it was still sad to hear about the type of life he led before his eventually suicide.

Bokuto buried his face in his hands, looking past Akaashi incredulously. “I can’t… I can’t even believe it.”

“Yes, it was probably a bit of a dramatic way to go,” Akaashi agreed.

“No, not that,” Bokuto shook his head, giving Akaashi a look that screamed sadness. “I just can’t believe you were hurt by others just because you talked a little differently than them.”

“It wasn’t entirely that, Kou--Bokuto-san.”

“Still! That’s… that’s horrible.”

Akaashi felt a certain disconnect with his human’s sentiments. Was this how Kenma found it easy to talk about his death? Since it had already happened? “I’m sure it was horrible at the time, but I’m alright.”

“Are you sure, Akaashi?”

“Yes, Bokuto-san, I’m sure,” Akaashi smiled, squeezing the man’s hand. “It’s easier to forget the horrible things when I’m with you.”

Bokuto seemed to be on the verge of tears. With a jerk forward that signaled his hesitance, the human leaned in closer and took the guardian’s face in his shaking hands.

“Akaashi.”

Keiji closed his eyes. He knew this was coming for a long time. He hadn’t figured it would happen under these circumstances, but he definitely wasn’t going to complain.

After all, Bokuto Koutarou was his  _ home _ .

If Akaashi’s home was unpredictable, if it was sweet and firm and strong like him, then, that was all he wanted.

The kiss tasted of ten percent seaweed, forty percent salt, and one hundred percent Bokuto. It was perfect.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Is this what you meant by dangerous?”

Tsukishima looked around at the surrounding amusement park with a scowl, his feet set on turning right around and leaving before the bedhead could drag him into another one of his deluded fantasies.

“Hey, you never know!” Kuroo asserted, a smirk clearly visible on his lips. “What if I fall off the rollercoaster, Tsukki? Who will save me then?”

The guardian clicked his tongue. “Fall off the rollercoaster then.”

“Wow, okay, uncalled for,” Kuroo retorted airily, extending his hand towards Tsukishima. 

Tsukishima paused, looking at the outstretched arm. “What?”

“I want to hold hands.”

“Hah?!”

Kuroo smirked, wiggling his fingers, but refusing to retract his arm. “C’mon, Tsukki, don’t leave me hanging.”

Tsukishima spluttered. “Why do we have to hold hands?”

Kuroo looked at him with a glance that rivaled a child’s innocence. “Why not?”

Kei scowled, folding his arms and making sure his hands were out of reach. “I’m good.”

Kuroo blinked before his eyes softened and he withdrew. “Alright then. But at least humor me a little today, won’t you Tsukki?”

Tsukishima mumbled something low in response and Kuroo smiled, pointing towards the teacups.

“Let’s do that first, yeah?”

“What does that do?”

Kuroo stared at Tsukishima, befuddled. “You’ve never been on teacups before?”

Kei fiddled with his hands. “No, is that so strange?”

“We are going on the cups  _ now _ .”

And Kuroo was off, sprinting forward to grab a space in line. Tsukishima followed shortly after, a bit wary and unsure of himself. Did this count as getting to know his human better? He looked around at the amusement park a bit apprehensively. He was more than positive his ‘home’ was not a haven of screaming children, sticky fingers, and gag reflexes.

Kuroo was bouncing on the balls of his feet when Tsukishima arrived. “Quickly, quickly Tsukki!”

“What’s so exciting about teacups?”

“Tsk, tsk, tsk,” Kuroo chided, a finger held in the air. “You are missing the beauty of the experience, good sir.”

Tsukishima watched as a group of kids spun around and around in their rides, all of them individually screaming at different octaves. The entire thing seemed to be… less than enjoyable. “I don’t think I want that experience.”

“Nonsense!” Kuroo exclaimed as they reached the front of the line. He turned to the worker there and handed her two tickets. “One teacup for two please!”

The lady stared at the stubs and then looked behind Kuroo in order to confirm that there were indeed two people. Tsukishima awkwardly picked at his fingernails, refusing to make eye contact with the girl.

“Two tickets, sir?”

Kuroo blinked, then found himself facepalming. “Ahh, that’s right. They can’t see you. I didn’t need to buy two tickets after all.”

“You actually bought two tickets?” Tsukishima teased, a goading smile on his lips. “Isn’t that expensive?”

“Gosh, Tsukki, cut me some slack, I was really excited about today, okay?” Kuroo grumbled, grabbing the extra ticket and shoving it into his pocket. He walked onto the ride and strode briskly to a golden red teacup, his cheeks tinted pink. “Now I’m going to look like the weird one riding a teacup alone.”

“You act as if you weren’t weird before.”

“Get in, you bully,” Kuroo opened the latch so that the two could sit inside. Making sure Kuroo couldn’t tease him for not knowing how to ride, Tsukishima stepped in with an air of confidence. His human followed him in, shutting the door tight.

“So, does it spin automatically?”

“Nah, you have to turn this”—Kuroo gestured to a white, circular metal dish in the middle that was attached to a stick—"if you want it to go faster. The entire ride does move the teacups around gradually, but it’s really fun if you spin it yourself.”

As Kuroo explained, an announcement rang off about fastening seatbelts. Both of them complied and soon, the teacups started moving.

“Like this!”

Kuroo grabbed the wheel and started turning it faster, and faster. Tsukishima felt his eyes bulge, and his knuckles nearly went white from clutching the edge of his seat so tightly. The world was swirling around him at a dizzying rate. His surroundings were a blur, Kuroo’s breath was short and ragged, diligently working to keep the ride moving constantly. They seemed to be going at a speed that was probably inadvisable, given the other park-goers were spinning around leisurely next to them.

Tsukishima was certain that if he were not already dead, this ride—no, this entire experience would have been the death of him. He wanted to tell Kuroo to stop so the two of them make their way towards the exit, never to return to this godforsaken place again.

Yet, through the momentum, Tsukishima caught a glimpse of Kuroo’s flushed, smiling face and he thought that even though this wasn’t exactly his cup of tea— _ heh _ —maybe it wasn’t all bad.

As if to put an end to those thoughts, there was a loud clank and the wheel groaned. Kuroo lifted his hands up defensively, away from the metal dish, but it was too late. Their teacup ground across the floor, derailed off the predetermined crevice in the ride and slammed right into the announcer’s booth, cracking a portion of the window.

“Shit,” Kuroo coughed, getting up from the wreckage and dusting himself off. Nobody seemed sure what to do except for Tsukishima who was laughing his ass off at the whole thing.

“Th-that’s a dangerous situation, alright!” Kei snickered, his eyes collecting tears at his merriment. “You didn’t even need Bokuto-san’s help to create this disaster!”

“Tsukki, this isn’t—”

“Sir,” the attendant who had walked up to Kuroo seemed to be hiding a mixture of disappointment, scrutiny, and mild panic in his eyes behind his cool exterior. “If you could please leave the premise.”

Kuroo turned bright red and he nodded frantically, grasping Tsukki’s hand and leading them away from the ride.

Tsukishima couldn’t stop laughing. “That was very exciting, Kuroo-san.”

“Oh, shush, you,” Kuroo grumbled, his ears refusing to return to their normal skin color. “That usually doesn’t happen.”

“Given your excitement, I find that difficult to believe,” Tsukishima smirked, minding a little less that he was being dragged around as long as he was entertained like that. “I thought Bokuto-san was the high-strung one.”

Kuroo grumbled something in response, pace quickening as he made his way to the other side of the amusement park. Tsukishima stayed mostly silent then, laughing to himself as he recounted the entire incident. Only when Kuroo started walking with a newfound sense of purpose towards a line of people nearby did he speak.

“What dangerous situation are we tackling next?”

Kuroo glanced at him with a look that channeled more confidence than ten minutes ago. He pointed up at towering pillars above them. “The rollercoaster!”

Looking up at the structures that reached the sky, Tsukishima’s stomach did a double flip. He made a face. “Must we?”

“Just like the teacups, rollercoasters are a classic, Tsukki!”

“By whose standards…” Tsukishima mumbled before realizing that the two were still holding hands. He didn’t know why but, the contact made him feel warm. Maybe it was the adrenaline talking though. He coughed once, staring directly at where their fingers were joined.

Kuroo blinked, then looked down after following Tsukishima’s gaze. He grinned, half-sheepishly, curling their fingers closer together. “Not bad, right?”

Tsukishima sputtered. There was a warmth spreading to his cheeks and he didn’t like it. He didn’t know why merely holding hands made him react in this way, but he pulled weakly to withdraw. Kuroo didn’t put up any resistance as their contact ceased. Though, as he pulled away, Tsukishima thought he saw a flicker of sadness flash across Kuroo’s eyes.

“Alright!” Kuroo stretched, squeezing his eyes shut and then giving Tsukishima a wink. The line moved forward a bit. “Ready for another dangerous adventure, Tsukki?”

Tsukishima stared up at the rollercoaster once more. A quick thought of pushing Kuroo off the highest point flitted through his mind for a brief moment before being replaced by a feeling of emptiness at the idea. The teacups were a disaster, but he undoubtedly enjoyed himself watching Kuroo exert himself. He wondered if there was more to it than the amusement though.

The guardian saw Kuroo watching him closely. He felt a soft warmth in the depths of his soul. He shrugged, a small smile fitting onto his lips. “I guess it wouldn’t kill me.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When Akaashi got back to the office, he found his folder waiting for him on the desk as if summoned by force of will. He slowly made his way to the chair and sat down, reaching for the contents and opening them with apprehension, though he already knew that the mystery was over.

_ Died: _ Age 22, overdose

Akaashi Keiji. Died in a hospital tied to blood transfusion tubes. Had depression and high anxiety; these symptoms hindered him from living like others his age. Did not feel life was worth living and swallowed a fatal number of pills.

Crime: Apathy

Sentence: Guardian

_ Numbers of humans that have been in their care: 1 _

The guardian leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes. It was clear now that the guardians weren’t here to be punished for anything. In fact, some higher power seemed to be trying to make amends for the wrongs that were made during their time alive by giving them a second chance. A chance to find home, but this time, while they were dead.

_ How cruel _ .

It was misguided kindness, at best. To know what they could have had through the lives of their humans, and giving them the warmth they wanted in life  _ now _ as opposed to then. Yet, Akaashi didn’t feel too upset over the fact. It was twisted and at the whims of non-human forces, but if it lead to Bokuto, then…

It didn’t seem all that bad.

He felt a twinge of sadness and he clutched the folder in front of him like a lifeline. Now that he knew the truth, it was only a matter of time before he disappeared. All this time, the guardians had viewed disappearance as this scary unknown, which still held true. But, now that Akaashi knew he would be gone permanently, he didn’t know if he wanted to go.

The thought of leaving his home was painful.

The thought of leaving Bokuto was painful.

He shook his head, staring blankly at the illuminated doorway in front of him. It had to happen eventually. He knew. And, he would have to deal with it.

All people died, and he would have to die legitimately this time.

No matter how much it hurt.

Akaashi turned and observed the tall wall of shelves behind him with little interest. He would wait for Tsukishima before he went out again. Even though the two hadn’t gotten along too well when they first met, Akaashi had grown fond of the blonde, and felt that he was one of the only things left in this place that kept him there.

Once he returned, Akaashi would leave and hopefully never come back.

This office wasn’t home after all.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Despite his protests, Tsukishima enjoyed himself on the date. Kuroo definitely put on a façade of bravado as he buckled his seatbelt on the rollercoaster, giving the blonde a thumbs up before screaming his head off for the entirety of the ride.

Tsukishima didn’t know it was possible for the raven’s bedhead to get worse, but it was quite a sight to behold. He snorted as Kuroo sheepishly pat it down and reached for Tsukishima’s hand once more.

The guardian took it without thinking. He figured it didn’t hurt as Kuroo was shaking a little from the exhilaration of the ride.

“Why’d we even ride if you can’t handle it?”

“I can  _ too _ handle it!” Kuroo had asserted, intertwining his fingers with Tsukishima’s a little more forcibly than need be. “I’ve been practicing with Bo!”

“Practicing?” Tsukishima lifted an eyebrow.

Kuroo pouted, scuffling his shoes as the two made their way to their second destination. “I’m… not the best with heights.”

Tsukishima blinked. “That’s surprising.”

Kuroo laughed. “Yeah, it’s kind of embarrassing. I’m not totally acrophobic, but I do get a little shaky.”

“So, when you said it’d be dangerous, that was mostly for your nerves.”

“Tsukki, you’re supposed to be my guardian angel. Aren’t you supposed to ground me in these situations?”

“There are many ways I could have grounded you on that rollercoaster and I’m not sure you would’ve preferred my primary method.”

Kuroo cackled and Tsukishima felt something soft and foreign enter his chest. “That’s fair. I’m still glad you stayed with me though.”

“I couldn’t have left even if I wanted to…”

“Sure,” Kuroo smirked, pointing at the folder in Tsukishima’s free hand. “You totally couldn’t have shaken that and left.”

Tsukishima stammered. “H-how did you—?”

Kuroo hummed. “I’m pretty observant. And with how quickly you leave from time to time, there’s no way I wouldn’t have noticed.”

The guardian watched as Kuroo made his way to another attraction—this time, it seemed to be an enclosed circle with miniature cars that had exaggerated shiny bumpers attached to the fronts and backs. His human made his way to the line, asking the worker there something that Tsukishima couldn’t hear.

There was a strange tightness in his chest. When Tsukishima was alive, he would do anything to avoid getting noticed. It was part of his job description after all, avoiding people and cutting them out of his life, mentally and physically.

The first time he realized he’d been spotted, his nerves were alight as if on fire, and it was the most unpleasant month of his life. He had to double check behind doors to see if anyone was following him or spying on him. He didn’t want to be seen because that would mean certain death. He probably couldn’t even count the amount of people who wanted him dead.

His job was simple and easy. He would take an assignment, head out, complete it, and come home with enough food to eat and a place to stay. He was good at his job, but he hardly wanted recognition for it. Recognition was a career ender. It had been his downfall after all.

It was too late when he noticed that night. A man had come at him from the shadows, aiming directly at his throat. He jumped back, crashing into some trashcans, engaging in a small scuffle that he was sure he would win.

He didn’t.

It was quiet and calm when the assaulter left the scene, leaving Tsukishima on the ground in a puddle of his own blood. All Tsukishima could think of then was how warm it felt as he lay there. How he wouldn’t have to go get suitable winter clothes that year because it was warm, so warm.

It was the most warmth he felt in his life.

Then, nothing.

Tsukishima had no family nor friends. He had a partner he worked with briefly--his older brother who he wasn’t sure he was related to biologically, but one day, the man had disappeared, and Tsukishima found himself alone again. It didn’t matter to him. This job didn’t afford him emotions. And, Tsukishima felt no qualms about feeling none.

So Kuroo noticing him should have alarmed him. All past experiences have told him that attention was dangerous. He needed to avoid it. But, instead, the warmth in his chest said otherwise.

It was uncomfortable and hot, and Tsukishima wasn’t sure if he liked it.

There were more little things throughout the rest of the day.

Kuroo would turn back to see if Tsukishima was still following him, he would make sure his seatbelt was on securely though it hardly mattered as the guardian was dead, and he would steer them away from the majority of crowds because Tsukishima seemed uncomfortable with them.

The guardian hadn’t said anything about his dislike for crowds.

By the time the sun was setting and the two were lined up for their last ride, Tsukishima was exhausted. More than the physical exertion which wasn’t much in the grand scheme of things, he felt mentally fatigued for reasons outside of his comprehension. 

As the pair got into their Ferris wheel car, and the doors closed, Tsukishima lay back on his seat across from Kuroo’s, feeling his eyelids droop.

“Tired?”

Tsukishima hummed, refusing to open his eyes. Kuroo’s ridiculous amount of care was unfair and unnatural. If this is how normal people lived their lives, Tsukishima didn’t know if he felt bad for his past life as an assassin. It was easy and all he knew. It was all he needed to know.

“Kei.”

Tsukishima blinked, sitting up as a hot wave of embarrassment coursed through his veins. “Wha—”

“Look,” Kuroo breathed, not looking at him.

The guardian turned to see where Kuroo was looking and felt his breath catch in his lungs.

He didn’t know how well Kuroo had planned this day, nor did he know how normal this kind of thing was on a so-called ‘date,’ but, as Tsukishima looked out of their window at the glowing hues of red, orange, and yellow, all thoughts left him.

Tsukishima was never able to stand by and watch something like this idly. If he wasn’t in the confines of his home, he wasn’t safe, and even then, he never settled. Being able to see a view like this with no fear of getting stabbed for loitering too long was in and of itself breathtaking.

The lounge was comfortable. He was already dead so what did it matter if someone jumped him there? He could relax, listen to music, and stay there, in the quiet for as long as he wanted. It was more of a home than any dwelling had ever been.

But, as he watched the last few rays of the sun illuminate the city around them and seem to set the world aglow, he felt inexplicably sad for his former self.

Kuroo turned to watch him and although Tsukishima could see him out of the corner of his eye, he didn’t register the human until the raven reached forward to swipe a finger under his eyes.

“Hey, are you okay?”

A wetness rolled down his cheek. He didn’t understand it. “No.”

Kuroo seemed to wince a little. “Was the date that bad?”

Tsukishima snorted, and it sounded full of snot and tears. He shook his head. “It didn’t kill me.”

Kuroo smiled, a small gesture that resonated in Tsukishima’s heart. “I thought the goal today was to keep  _ me _ alive.”

“My mistake, I must’ve forgotten,” Tsukishima exhaled, a laugh on his lips. 

Kuroo was still smiling. He had reached forward at some point to grab Tsukishima’s hands. The guardian had taken them on instinct, as if it was natural.

“Tell me about you.”

“There isn’t much to tell.”

“That’s unfair, Kei, you know all about me, I would assume given that folder you carry around all the time.”

“It’s blank.”

“Is it really?” he sounded slightly disappointed.

Tsukishima laughed. “No.”

Kuroo looked elated. “So?”

“So, what?”

“Will you tell me?”

“It’s not… a happy story.”

“That’s okay, it’s your story.”

_ You’ll hate me,  _ the thought rang out in Tsukishima’s head. How stupid. When was the last time he’d cared about what other people thought? Plenty of people hated him when he was alive.

“Okay, then, let’s play a game.”

“A game?”

Kuroo tapped his chin as if in deep thought. “What did you like when you were alive?”

“What I liked?”

“Yeah, like, your favorite food.”

Tsukishima didn’t have to think long. “Strawberry shortcakes.”

Kuroo beamed. “Really?”

The guardian felt flushed. “It’s weird, I know.”

“No, no, it’s great!” Kuroo said, leaning forward. “How’d you know it was your favorite?”

“On one of my assignments, I had to infiltrate a fancy dinner party. They were serving it and I treated myself to some. Nothing else has compared since.”

“Is it cause it’s sweet?”

Tsukishima hummed. “I  _ do _ like sweet food.”

“Good to know,” Kuroo smiled. “What else?”

“…dinosaurs are cool.”

“Dinosaurs?”

“They were my fascination since I was little.”

“That’s really cute, Kei,” Kuroo said with no hint of teasing in his voice.

Tsukishima wondered if it was too late to shove Kuroo off the Ferris wheel. “Being a first-rate murderer isn’t something most people consider cute.”

Kuroo blinked. “Like, an assassin?”

Tsukishima suddenly felt like their hands were too close, too clammy. He wanted to pull away and end it. “Yes. Does that scare you?”

“No,” came the reply, confident and instant.

Tsukishima peered over, confused. “Why not?”

“Because it’s you, Kei.”

_ But, I’m nobody important. _

The sun set past the horizon and their car reached the bottom of the wheel. They got off the ride and Kuroo seemed to be patiently awaiting the moment Tsukishima left.

He didn’t know why he couldn’t.

Instead, they walked hand in hand out of the amusement park and into the city, watching the lazy lights of Tokyo blink back at them in greeting.

Kuroo came to a stop abruptly as they walked and Tsukishima halted next to him.

“Do you want to stop by here?”

Tsukishima followed the man’s finger to a small café, the display stands glowing softly in the windows. His eyes raked over the strawberry shortcake a moment longer than needed. Kuroo noticed.

Of course, he did.

“Guardians don’t need to eat.”

“But, can you?”

Kuroo took Tsukishima’s silence for an affirmative.

The two entered the café, and Kuroo immediately ordered the strawberry shortcake. Tsukishima trailed behind him, unsure what to do with this charity. He thought he’d never get to taste the fluffy pastry again, and yet, there he was, sitting in a dimly lit establishment, a fork in hand, ready to eat it once more.

He took a bite and instantly recoiled.

Kuroo startled, taking his own portion before making a face as well.

“Oh my god, that’s disgusting,” Kuroo spat, grabbing his cup of water to down the nastiness. “Sorry, Kei, I didn’t realize—”

Tsukishima took another mouthful, then another.

“Kei?”

When Tsukishima looked up, Kuroo was looking at him with a soft expression. “Was it that good?”

“It wasn’t.”

Kuroo blinked. “Then, why?”

Tsukishima didn’t know how to explain to the man that even though the cake itself tasted terrible, the company spent made it somewhat bearable. It made the cake taste sweeter.

Instead, he shrugged. “I didn’t want to waste your money.”

“That’s thoughtful of you,” Kuroo seemed beside himself with joy. “You didn’t have to force yourself, but… I’m glad. I’m happy we got to spend today together. I’m happy I got to know more about you.”

Tsukishima didn’t know how to answer, the sweetness clogging up his systems.

They exited the café, vowing never to return. Tsukishima continued to turn Kuroo’s words around inside his head. Finally, he spoke.

“I was a nobody.”

“Hm?” Kuroo turned to look at him as they continued to walk back to his house.

“Nobody cared about me and I didn’t give a damn. It was fine being a nobody. It was easier than…” Tsukishima gestured to nothing. “Today.”

Kuroo stopped. “Kei, did I—”

“I used to want things. I wanted to do something that made me happy, but instead I got stuck with something that I needed to survive. Then, I couldn’t quit because I was in too deep. Then, I was murdered and forgotten. A nobody.”

Kuroo was quiet for a moment before he spoke, voice barely over a whisper. “In an alternate universe, I’m sure you have friends who love and care about you.”

Tsukishima waited, a longing strong and painful in his chest.

“And, then we would meet somehow and get closer too,” Kuroo laughed softly. “I would bother you as often as I could, and we could get strawberry shortcake—the good kind—whenever you wanted.”

“Heh,” Tsukishima couldn’t stop the tears anymore. “That’s so lame, T-Tetsurou.”

Kuroo froze and Tsukishima took the opportunity to release his hand from his human’s, reaching up to wipe at his leaking eyes. 

“Kei?”

“Thank you,” Tsukishima managed, his heart filling in places he didn’t even know were empty. “It hurts, but, it’s…”

Kuroo said his name again, more panicked this time, but Tsukishima could hardly hear it. It wasn’t long before a sense of peace rushed over his entire being and settled in the depths of his soul. His tears had dried, and his heart was free. He found it.

_ Home. _

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Quiet.

It was quiet.

The isolation itself wasn’t scary. It was more frightening because Akaashi could hear his own thoughts echoing against his ears. He didn’t know how long it had been since he had been sitting there in that office chair, but he knew one thing for certain.

Tsukishima was gone.

Akaashi hadn’t bothered to check the folders, he just knew it somehow in the depths of his soul. He was the sole guardian left.

Silently, he stood, grabbing Bokuto’s folder. He had no intention of disappearing so soon, but he didn’t know if he wanted to come back to the office and lounge in the lonely brightness. With a final look at the place, and clutching his home in his arms. He made his way out the doorway, resolving to stay with his human for as long as it was possible.

Unfortunately, it was on the fourth year that his resolution broke.

It wasn’t a huge incident that set it off. The two lay in Bokuto’s living room, resting on top of the couch as Akaashi flipped aimlessly through some tv programs they had seen the day prior. Akaashi was between his human’s legs, flipping through a magazine before Bokuto spoke up, subdued and worried.

“Keiji?”

“Hm?”

“Are you okay?”

Akaashi blinked, then leaned up to place a soft kiss on Bokuto’s cheek. “Yes, I am, why, is there something wrong?”

Bokuto sighed, flicking the television off before nuzzling his head in his guardian’s shoulders. “I don’t want you to go.”

“I’m not going anywhere, Bokuto-san.”

“That’s not what I mean.”

“What do you mean, then?” Akaashi pushed, setting his reading down onto the coffee table in front of them.

“What happens when I die?”

Akaashi stiffened. “What?”

“I mean, what happens to you after I die? Do you die too? Do you get a new human? What happens, Keiji?”

“You won’t die, Bokuto-san. I’m in control of that, remember?”

“Yeah, but Kuroo will die, right?”

Akaashi was silent, fitting his fingers into Bokuto’s mindlessly. “Yes, he will probably die.”

“Didn’t he have a guardian too?”

“He did.”

“Did his guardian quit? Did he disappear?”

“He disappeared,” Akaashi stated, matter-of-factly.

“But, then who will kill Kuroo then?”

Akaashi paused, considering. “I…”

“I don’t think—and don’t be mad, ‘Kaashi, I’m just wondering—guardians kill as you think they do. Kuroo is going to get old and then die, and I’m going to be the same.”

“That’s ridiculous, Bokuto-san.”

“Even if I’m wrong, what happens when I get old, Akaashi? If you keep me alive forever, I’m not going to be able to do anything. I don’t want to be alive if I’m just a vegetable.”

Akaashi considered. It made sense and the truth seemed to settle firmly into his bones. “You’re… you’re right.”

“Like,” Bokuto elaborated, raising his hands to demonstrate. “I’m sure guardians can kill people because it’s happened before, right? But, when people get old, I think they just die without the guardians doing anything. Because otherwise, it’s really sad you know? Being a really old guy, forever and ever.”

He took a large, shaky breath and Akaashi knew what was coming next. “And, I don’t want you to suffer without me.”

Akaashi laughed nervously. “I’m not going to suffer if you’re still alive and well, Bokuto-san.”

“Am I still me if I can’t do anything that makes me, me?”

Akaashi looked down at the floor, biting his lower lip. “I don’t want to imagine a world without you.”

“But, you’ll have to. Eventually.”

“I don’t know where I’m going or where you’ll go.”

“I don’t know either, but probably the same place as you, right?” Bokuto smiled, and the gesture was so genuine, it tugged at Akaashi’s heart.

“You don’t know that, Bokuto-san.”

“But, I don’t  _ don’t _ know that, right?”

Akaashi opened up Bokuto’s hand, tracing the lines of the taller man’s palm. “I’m scared. I’ve never… wanted to live before.”

Bokuto blinked, and his silence prompted Akaashi to continue.

“You know how I passed away. It was hard because I did not have anything to look forward to in life, but now,” Akaashi felt his eyes prickle. “Now, I have something to live for. And, you’re telling me that I can’t even live for that? That, I need to prepare to lose you too?”

“Keiji,” Bokuto mouthed as the guardian took a shaky breath.

“You showed me so much life. I want to live it with you. But, you’re right,” he admitted, looking away. “We’re not okay. I was a kid with the same brain I had when I died and similarly I’m an adult with you with that same brain as well. What happens when you’re a grandpa and I’m still twenty-two?”

“It’s scary,” he continued, voicing his worries aloud as he had gotten more accustomed to doing around Bokuto. “I’ll look the same as you, but you’ll forget things, you’ll grow weaker, and smaller. But, I’ll be okay.”

Akaashi shook his head, a bitter laugh welling up in his lungs. “But, I won’t be okay because of you.”

_ Do you think guardian angels stay with you forever? Or is it only for a small part of your life, when it matters the most and then they’re gone, but they’re still there, in your heart? _

The words echoed in Akaashi’s head, remembering one of the first questions that Bokuto had asked him. Akaashi hadn’t known the answer at the time, nor had he wanted to know.

Now, he knew.

He wasn’t meant to be here.

He wasn’t meant to be at his home.

Kuroo remembered the other part of Tsukishima’s name. Whenever he said it though, there was silence and Akaashi couldn’t figure out what it was. Kuroo couldn’t remember the name ‘Tsukishima’ either.

Akaashi didn’t want to fade from Bokuto’s memory.

But, in remembering that empty office and lounge, he didn’t want to stay forever, either.

“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi choked, fighting back tears. “Will you forget me?”

Bokuto’s reply was instant. “Never! I’ll always remember and I’m going to find you in my next life too! And, the next, and the next, and forever!”

“You didn’t…” Akaashi sniffed, clutching his chest. He knew he was being ridiculous. “You didn’t find me in my last.”

“That’s ‘cause this was the first time I met you! Now that I know, I’ll never lose you!”

He was dead. His time here shouldn’t matter. He had already spent his time alive. Now, he had to leave. He had to.

But, Bokuto was still here.

He wanted to live.

He wanted to stay, but he knew he didn’t have a say in this. He could feel the same transparency he had felt in the office years back, when he first discovered he could leave, but he didn’t want to. That want was stronger than ever. He couldn’t stop crying.

Bokuto cupped Akaashi’s face in his hands. “Keiji. I’ll find you.”

“Please find me,” Akaashi whispered, as feeling left his body. “Thank you for—”

“No,” Bokuto near shouted and Akaashi was filled with adoration for the man once more. “Thank  _ you _ for finding me first! Keiji, I love—”

Then, there was nothingness, but the feeling of home.

  
  


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Akaashi bowed as the coach introduced him to the rest of the team. He gave a polite smile to all of them, then turned to leave the gym.

Before he could get very far, a broad-shouldered man burst in through the door, knocking him to the floor.

“Crap, ah, I’m sorry! I was late so I was panicking and I ran and didn’t see—” the man yelled as Akaashi cradled his nose in his hands. It felt like it was bleeding, but he wasn’t sure he wanted to check.

“That’s alright,” Akaashi began as the man paused, looking him over. His golden eyes kept Akaashi in place.

“Are you new?”

“Yes, I’m a setter.”

“Setter!” the man bellowed before enveloping Akaashi in a tight hug.

Akaashi heard the reprimanding yells of his upperclassmen around him as the strange looking boy continued to embrace him, but he focused on the feeling of comfortability he felt instead. The man’s arms were wide and warm and the feeling of Akaashi’s chest against this person’s felt familiar. It was soft and painful, and it made Akaashi feel as if his heart was being wrung out like a towel. His heartbeat thudded in his chest.

_ Was he gay? _

“I’m Bokuto! Bokuto Koutarou!”

“Akaashi,” the first-year said quietly, trying to pin the name to something. “Akaashi Keiji.”

Bokuto blinked and it was as if he felt the pull himself too. It lasted for only a brief moment before he beamed, stepping back and resting his hands on his hips. “Well, I’m glad you found the Fukurodani volleyball team, ‘Kaashi!”

“Sorry you got stuck with us,” one of the upperclassmen, a tall, lanky boy with dirty blonde hair spoke up, pointing to Bokuto. “And stuck with him.”

“Hey!” Bokuto yelped, glaring at the man as he scampered away.

“Yes,” Akaashi said, ignoring the whole ordeal, but feeling a smile tug on his face anyways. “I’m glad I found you too.”

Bokuto paused momentarily, then, raised his hand to scratch behind his head. He looked down at the floor, contemplative and shy, uncharacteristically so. “Yeah.”

“Bokuto-san?”

“Nothing!” He responded, louder than needed for the gymnasium. He smiled at Akaashi, looking like he wanted nothing more than to embrace him again. Akaashi didn’t think he would have minded it. “Ignore Konoha, he’s a butt sometimes. You might need to get used to it though. Our team will hang out so much, it’ll feel like a second home to you!”

The word home lingered for a moment longer before disappearing from Akaashi’s thoughts completely. He gave his upperclassman a look that was weighted with more emotion than he had intended, surprising even himself. Bokuto looked back at him with just as much softness.

“I’m looking forward to it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had 80% of this draft sitting in my wips for a year, and I finally decided to just end it. There's a lot of things I wasn't happy about mostly in regards to my writing overall, but I've definitely improved now. So if you're willing to give my other newer fics a go, please do! I promise they are so much better than this xD
> 
> Regardless, I'm still happy with how I've concluded the fic. When I first started writing, I had no clue other writers separated ships and had different series for different things and just--I was VERY disorganized as a newbie xD Now that I know better, I definitely want to keep writing, but as for this fic and its AU, it's concluded. I hope you've enjoyed throughout the ride and if you've stuck with me this long, then thank you??? I'm so grateful.
> 
> Anyway that's all I'll ramble on about! You can find me below, as always! Thanks for reading!  
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/tetsookie)  
> [Tumblr](http://greendoodle.tumblr.com/)


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